Hand shaking is so stupid

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zer0netgain, Men hug each other all the time.

I carry hand sanitizer.

I guess the frequency of hugs among men in the US depends on the subculture. I prefer subcultures without a lot of arbitrary restrictions on behavior.

All the men I know have no problems hugging each other.

When I was in college, one of the dads of one of the boys in my dorm came to visit him. They had not seen each other in months. When they saw each other for the first time they shook hands like businessmen. I was shocked. I had never seen such a thing. Most dads I know when seeing their sons for the first time after having been apart for months would do at the very least a big hug and sometimes, especially in my family and culture, even a kiss or two. And even the American dads I know and am friends with usually at least hug their sons. And when we see our male friends, single or married, dads or childless, they hug my husband and brother without any hesitation. I never understood this seemingly cold interaction that I saw. It was like he was treating his son like a business man he was meeting for the first time ever.

For years, I avoided shaking hands by feigning having something on my hands or having a cold. Eventually I forced myself to get used to it. Still don't like it, don't like being touched at all by people I don't know well, but I can deal with it.

Now, hugging is another story. I seem to keep meeting people who think the proper way to greet me is to give me a hug. As I've discovered, when you take a step back from someone who is trying to hug you, there's nothing you can say at that point that won't make them hate you

I have never really gotten why that even became how to greet people....however the only time it really ever bothers me is if its someone with a bad vibe and it feels gross having to touch them I guess.

I'm among the older ones here, and I have no problem whatsoever shaking hands (unless, of course, the person's hands are real sweaty----UGH----but you can't wipe them on your jeans, or anything, that's socially unacceptable, but it gives me the willies). I guess because I was taught as a kid that it "shows good character" (I'm a girl, so I wasn't told it would show I'm a good man). I also get a feeling of disgust, really, when someone has a limp handshake----INSTANTLY I have judged them as a weak person-----ESPECIALLY if it's a woman, I wanna smack her (not literally, of course). I have TRIED to re-think that philosophy, however, and just say "they haven't been taught differently, that's all." I haven't been successful, so far, though----like I said ESPECIALLY if it's a woman, I automatically think "Grow a backbone, will ya, already!"

As for the hugging thing: I think there was confusion because the OP seemed to defeat his own argument by giving examples of when men DO have physical contact other than a handshake-----but, there was a point made regarding "friends and family" vs. strangers. I don't know if that was made clear, as almost every proceeding post gave examples of family and friends, hugging. I, TOO, have seen lots of men hugging----but, they all knew each other / were related. I don't think I've ever seen strangers hug each other----unless, maybe, it's some group therapy, maybe, or something like that?

Breathing also spreads germs.

I probably have lower sensitivity to germ phobias than I do to other phobias, but the germ phobic people like to act all scientific and rational in order to make their phobia seem reasonable. People who fear heights or spiders or crowds or clowns or the number 13 don't seem to feel the need to torture logic in the same way.

I just want you all to know that I mentally edit your posts and substitute "cooties" for "germs."

Sometimes I am OCD about germs. I disinfect groceries. But I also know that I can't be paranoid because germs are everywhere and we are in constant contact with them. I just know to wash my hands properly and effectively pretty frequently and before preparing food and eating and after going to the bathroom. I disinfect things more than other people do but I try to just be conscious and mindful but not overly worried.

I'm not a real huggy-huggy type myself. The only people I don't mind hugging are close lady friends.

Even when my father wants to hug me (HE'S a huggy-huggy type, and not an effeminate man), I recoil somewhat.

Limp handshakes irritate me. It's like I'm "shaking" a wet noodle.

Ezra, I am going off topic for just one moment, but I had to giggle because with your new avatar I feel like I want to call you Captain Ezra! (like Captain America)