when was last time you were happy?

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I said about 5 years ago, but I really can't remember the last time I felt "happy." I do know it's happened, though.

Thank you for those kind words.

You see though, I am not depressed either!

If the poll was 'when was the last time you felt sad'? I would have still voted; 'I don't remember'...'.when did you experience your last emotion?' 'I don't remember'...etc

Lack of happiness isn't depression, just like the lack of depression isn't happiness.

It starts off as depression......as learned helplessness, until it just becomes accepted as the norm and then there are no feelings whatsoever.

When my depression was just past the peak of its worst point, I became like this. It's like I just lost all feeling. I didn't really care anymore... I wasn't happy, but I wasn't miserable. At least, I didn't feel sad. I was just... eh. Empty, might be the best word. It's like I was filled up inside with grey clouds. I could throw myself into special interests and escapes, and I cared about things, but it wasn't the same as really feeling. Now, it's like I'm full of... me. Yellow, pink, and wiggling points of light. I feel sad, angry, and frustrated, but I also feel happy and excited. Colors are brighter, even. I honestly hadn't realized how bad my depression had gotten until I had a serious epiphany about my life and became happy again. I hadn't noticed, because I wasn't "sad." I even stopped taking my anti-depressants, because I thought I didn't need them! I had just forgotten what it was like to be truly happy.

On Friday when I got a call from my job placement specialist. He said that I was going to have a working job interview where I get to be Pea Picker for an hour so the boss at the farm can decide whether the job will work out for me. I know I'll do a very good job at the speed he wants.

That trial is tomorrow afternoon at 4:30. I hope it goes well.

I have two kids and a husband and supportive parents so I have no reason to be unhappy.

A couple days ago when a meeting went well even though I was expecting it to go poorly. I usually feel pretty okay, it's just been a rough few days.

Today/yesterday & pretty much every day at some point or another. This weekend was a river rafting/camping trip with a bunch of high school buddies and some of their wives/gf's/bf's etc. Beautiful scenery, gorgeous weather w/ plenty of sun, good laughs, river rafting, campfire, good food/drink, strippers at a bachelorette party's campfire across the site, good people, nice wood fired sauna, semi-private beach we went to yesterday afternoon, walked under/through a waterfall, bald eagles & stealer's jays flying around etc. Plenty of happy times over this weekend.

Hooooooping to get my work/life/other obligations all taken care of m-f all Summer so I can get out and enjoy as many weekends as possible. Ideally this will include loading my car with gear & driving ~100km to go kiteboarding in Squamish, possibly camping a night or two. 5+ years ago there was a woman in the local scene that would drive up after work on Friday, sleep in her car, kite Saturday, sleep in her car, kite Sunday, then drive back down to town to get ready for m-f work life again. I might try to replicate her weekends if I can swing the time. I'll probably feel pretty gross about not showering lol but might just bathe in the sea, but the happiness of all that good fun far outweighs the ocd of wanting a daily shower.

Even if I don't get out much, I'll be super happy when I do. If for some reason I can't get out much, I'll at least try to spend my time doing other things that make me happy, whether exercising or visiting friends/family etc there's a whole lot to be happy about every single day. Being alive, this beautiful majestic place I live in (seriously, it's no wonder real estate is so expensive here - we're quite spoiled with the mountains & ocean and all the gorgeous features this place has to offer as a city in the rainforest on the West coast of Canada.), health/fitness/ability to do work & sports and have fun, friends/family, goals I've achieved & others I'm working on. Life has gone from pretty unhappy in the past to pretty amazingly happy.

I put one day to one week.
I've been more happy lately.

Things that make me happy:
reading a good book.Planting my vege garden. My husband. My dog. Meeting people who actually accept me as I am. Cooking. Drawing. Exercising. Hiking in nature. Getting drunk and singing along to You tube.

Things that make me sad:
Realising most of my family of origin consider me a disappointing embarrassment, and would not cross the road to help me.
Realising most people are shallow and out for themselves.
Realising a lot of my colleagues are manipulative backstabbers, who watch my kitchen rules and think it's "reality TV".Yeah try David Attenborough , girls.

Today's been a very happy day for me. I got the job as a pea picker.

I cannot believe no one responded to you when you wrote this

I'm sry to hear that your life has been so awful.

Do you have a specific plan to end your life?

I would be happy to talk with you if you need someone to talk to.

I have a strong understanding of the power of these types of feelings.

Pls let me know how you are doing, okay?

Are you refering to brief moments of happiness, or prolonged happiness? If the later, over what amount of time?

I am happy for brief periods when I'm hanging out with Suzie, my stuffed toy. But the last time I was happy in general was two and a half years ago. I was living in another city at the time, but came back to stay at my mother's while I worked a temp job. It was full-time and involved computers, limited interaction with friendly people, and no BS. It was a great summer. I would have kept that job forever if I could.

But it only lasted a month or two. Then I went back to the city, my emotional and mental state plummeted, and I began to realize I had serious psychological issues--what kind, I didn't know yet. I lost my job and had to leave my apartment. I've recovered from that situation, but just barely. Life hasn't been the same since. Not that it was a bed of roses before that. But that was the time I lost hope that I could ever belong in this world.

I am very interested to know what happiness feels like. How would you describe the feeling of happiness? What area of the body is it located in? Is it similar to excitement?

I suppose as a child I was happy (aren't most children?), I'm not sure though. Happiness seems such a subjective thing. I am not unhappy except when depression sets in. Someone actually asked me that the other day and my response was, 'I'm content with my life'. Perhaps that is happiness...I really don't know?

Wife made home made Mexican dinner last night. Followed that with a large piece of dark chocolate.

Happy happy - joy joy. Happy happy - joy joy.

Ohhhh gosh, it would have been YEARS ago....probably when I was 11 years old, prior to my stepfather having to move out of state and take my mom and half-sisters with him, starting a custody battle between the two of them and my father and stepmother that was even nastier than my parents' divorce when I was only 5 and a half.

I loved being 11....people seemed to enjoy being around me, and I around them, my main special interest was the movie Finding Nemo, and I wrote/drew elaborate, fantastical fanfics and songs about the characters, whom I thought of as my imaginary friends. I had a vague awareness that I was different, but since no one made a big deal out of it or made me feel ashamed of it (not yet, anyway) it didn't matter to me that much. I assumed that everyone else was "weird" and I was normal, rather than it being the other way around.