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babybird
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18 Jun 2014, 3:18 pm

Joe90 wrote:
Welcome to Wrong Planet! :D


:D


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skibum
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18 Jun 2014, 3:27 pm

Yes , Welcome. We are glad to have you here.


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HarmonySeptember
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18 Jun 2014, 3:35 pm

Not at all. Welcome! :)


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18 Jun 2014, 3:54 pm

Absolutely, stay. There have been several NTs I made friends with here and wish they were still around. If I wasn't an Aspie, I would probably feel the way you do in being abe to relate better with them then other types of people.



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18 Jun 2014, 8:07 pm

IncredibleFrog wrote:
I hope this doesn't sound silly, but would it bother anyone here that I use this website occasionally even though I don't have an ASD diagnoses? I was diagnosed with aspergers when i was a kid, but my doctor told me recently (I'm now 19) that I "outgrew" it, which I didn't think was possible, but...

I signed up because several of my friends have aspergers, and possibly my dad. I ended up liking the site so much that I stuck around.

My point is, I like this site and I feel comfortable here, but I feel bad using the site when I might not even have aspergers. Does it bother anyone that I'm here?


I am technically NT, but have some traits on the spectrum and my whole family is ASD. I feel comfortable here. I have wondered if others don't think I should be here though. I am glad to hear I am also welcome.


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IncredibleFrog
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18 Jun 2014, 9:46 pm

thechameleon wrote:
IncredibleFrog wrote:
I hope this doesn't sound silly, but would it bother anyone here that I use this website occasionally even though I don't have an ASD diagnoses? I was diagnosed with aspergers when i was a kid, but my doctor told me recently (I'm now 19) that I "outgrew" it, which I didn't think was possible, but...

I signed up because several of my friends have aspergers, and possibly my dad. I ended up liking the site so much that I stuck around.

My point is, I like this site and I feel comfortable here, but I feel bad using the site when I might not even have aspergers. Does it bother anyone that I'm here?


It sounds like your doctor is another ignorant one that isn't good at his job. You can't outgrow it, you can be misdiagnosed, but you can't outgrow it.

There's definitely NTs here, it's always good to have their side, especially when in need of an NT opinion.


I guess I should have worded that differently. He said I may have been misdiagnosed, but he also said I could have "outgrown it", by which he meant I had learned to socialize and read social cues well enough that if I had aspergers it was no longer obvious to others.

That being said, I often feel like I have more trouble with socializing than others do, and I often have to "fake" my reactions so that I seem more "normal". As a kid though I had no idea about socializing, but I sort of studied other people as a teen in an effort to make friends, and I have gotten much better. I was bullied a lot as a kid for being different, and doing "inappropriate things". Like if I liked someone I would just go up to them and kiss them, and if I disliked someone I would try to scare them off by barking like a dog. I also had a lot of sensory issues, and to this day certain sensations bother me, although at least I can wear jeans now.



IncredibleFrog
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18 Jun 2014, 9:47 pm

Toy_Soldier wrote:
Absolutely, stay. There have been several NTs I made friends with here and wish they were still around. If I wasn't an Aspie, I would probably feel the way you do in being abe to relate better with them then other types of people.


Thank you! I figured it was probably ok since NT is an option when you sign up for the site, but I'm glad to hear no one minds.



kraftiekortie
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18 Jun 2014, 9:50 pm

This was my life as a kid, Incredible Frog!

Inappropriate utterances, bullying, howling in the subways LOL.



IncredibleFrog
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18 Jun 2014, 10:01 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
This was my life as a kid, Incredible Frog!

Inappropriate utterances, bullying, howling in the subways LOL.


Hahaha! And here I thought I was the only kid who growing up thought I was a dog.

One time a guy was hitting on my mom and I got so annoyed I growled at him and chased him off.



IncredibleFrog
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18 Jun 2014, 10:11 pm

Waterfalls wrote:
You can be here either way, this place isn't in my mind a place for people to be excluding others, though people are people and individuals may occasionally do this.

The important thing IMO would be that you get something from being here, maybe give something back. Then it's worth it!

I hope it's ok to ask, do you still identify having any difficulty communicating, or understanding people, or with confusion or sensory problems? If so, I think this is a good place to read how others handle these things and sometimes get a better way of understanding or coping with the world


Thanks! Yes, I still have trouble communicating, although I have learned to fake it to a certain degree, which may be the reason for the changed diagnoses. Not to stereotype, but I feel like I get along better with people who have aspergers because they tend to be more honest and straightforward. Having to constantly interpret social cues is emotionally exhausting to me. When I'm with my friends with aspergers I feel like I can just be myself. When I'm with NT people, I'm more self conscious because I feel like I don't know what's expected of me.



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19 Jun 2014, 12:28 am

If you had Autism when you were a little kid you still have it. You don't outgrow it. You can learn to cope or fake it enough to be functional in society,


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19 Jun 2014, 6:37 am

IncredibleFrog wrote:
Yes, I still have trouble communicating, although I have learned to fake it to a certain degree, which may be the reason for the changed diagnoses. Not to stereotype, but I feel like I get along better with people who have aspergers because they tend to be more honest and straightforward. Having to constantly interpret social cues is emotionally exhausting to me. When I'm with my friends with aspergers I feel like I can just be myself. When I'm with NT people, I'm more self conscious because I feel like I don't know what's expected of me.

I saw in your profile you are female. It is harder for most diagnosticians to recognize females with ASD. Then, also, your doctor sounds like someone treating you for a clinical condition, and might be intending to be encouraging. Plus if they are treating you for something else, they are likely more expert in what they are treating you for then in recognizing ASDs. Just guessing, don't know of course.

From what I have seen, the growing out of thing occurs infrequently if it does, and is still controversial, but is described in children identified as preschoolers who seem to grow out of the ASD by or in the early grades. Have not seen studies that you can grow out of ASD if you have it into the mid and upper grades, so I would not get too caught up in the label. And if it bothers you and you feel you need an answer, you could ask your doctor about being reevaluated for ASD, if there is something that would help with.



thechameleon
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19 Jun 2014, 7:46 am

IncredibleFrog wrote:
"outgrown it", by which he meant I had learned to socialize and read social cues well enough that if I had aspergers it was no longer obvious to others.

That being said, I often feel like I have more trouble with socializing than others do, and I often have to "fake" my reactions so that I seem more "normal". As a kid though I had no idea about socializing, but I sort of studied other people as a teen in an effort to make friends, and I have gotten much better. I was bullied a lot as a kid for being different, and doing "inappropriate things". Like if I liked someone I would just go up to them and kiss them, and if I disliked someone I would try to scare them off by barking like a dog. I also had a lot of sensory issues, and to this day certain sensations bother me, although at least I can wear jeans now.


This is something I've always avidly hated about diagnosis's. The fact that being able to deal with something means you can't be diagnosed with it. I think it's utter BS.

Being able to deal with something and not having the problem in the first place are two very different things in my opinion. The fact that learning to act like a 'normal' person means you 'no longer have it' has always felt like an insult to me. Undermining the effort of the constant struggle and the work involved... But that might just be my opinion.

I'd really like a mind-transfer machine, so that they can try the work out. See if struggling to be 'normal' makes you normal.



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19 Jun 2014, 7:53 am

thechameleon wrote:
This is something I've always avidly hated about diagnosis's. The fact that being able to deal with something means you can't be diagnosed with it. I think it's utter BS.


I agree.

If a person with cerebral palsy gets intensive therapy to the point where they can walk regularly without any assistive device, they don't say that person has outgrown CP. If a Deaf person learns to read lips and speak to the point where many people could have a conversation with her and not know she was Deaf, they don't say she's not Deaf anymore. Why do they do this with autism?



kraftiekortie
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19 Jun 2014, 8:00 am

Excellent, illustrative points.



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19 Jun 2014, 8:25 am

thechameleon wrote:
IncredibleFrog wrote:
"outgrown it", by which he meant I had learned to socialize and read social cues well enough that if I had aspergers it was no longer obvious to others.

That being said, I often feel like I have more trouble with socializing than others do, and I often have to "fake" my reactions so that I seem more "normal". As a kid though I had no idea about socializing, but I sort of studied other people as a teen in an effort to make friends, and I have gotten much better. I was bullied a lot as a kid for being different, and doing "inappropriate things". Like if I liked someone I would just go up to them and kiss them, and if I disliked someone I would try to scare them off by barking like a dog. I also had a lot of sensory issues, and to this day certain sensations bother me, although at least I can wear jeans now.


This is something I've always avidly hated about diagnosis's. The fact that being able to deal with something means you can't be diagnosed with it. I think it's utter BS.

Being able to deal with something and not having the problem in the first place are two very different things in my opinion. The fact that learning to act like a 'normal' person means you 'no longer have it' has always felt like an insult to me. Undermining the effort of the constant struggle and the work involved... But that might just be my opinion.

I'd really like a mind-transfer machine, so that they can try the work out. See if struggling to be 'normal' makes you normal.


So I think it's like this: we think the diagnosis is about understanding some property of an objective reality, but it is not. Medical diagnoses can play that role, but they are also about allocating therapeutic resources and insurance compensation.

In the absence of objective tests for autism, we can't say "this person has this neurological configuration and therefore fits in this group, but is compensating to such a degree that no extraordinary supports are required."I believe that there will soon be a day when we can do some genotyping and brain scanning and say exactly that--and that will increase and enrich our understanding of the phenotypes that now fall under "ASD." But we are not there now.

So you have people who might be compensating well enough to be subclinical one year, but diagnosable the next because some change in circumstance has undermined their ability to cope. This makes sense if we are thinking of diagnosis as a system of recognizing needed support but not if we are thinking of the diagnosis as an objective test of an underlying reality.