NT's claiming you're too smart to have AS

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I thought the emotional control part was alluding to that.



That sounds like depression to me and I'm sorry you experience that. My meltdowns are when I can't function because I'm overstimulated. But not being able to function can be due to other reasons like being depressed.



I don't think anyone does, I see that exact same behaviour in relatives and people I've known in the past. Strangely I never cry myself.



When you need a lot of intervention. All your life. That's my definition.

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That sounds like depression to me and I'm sorry you experience that.

There's a lot of people, especially grown women, who didn't get intervention all their lives because they didn't present like the typical autistic kid and Asperger's wasn't really looked at until after a lot of these people (including myself) were out of school. We have had to make do and learn stuff.

I definitely do not have ADHD or OCD or BPD. I could list all the reasons from childhood why AS makes the most sense of my life experiences. This is not the place to do this. I was only trying to relate to the OP about people having this idea that one cannot have AS if they are so smart. I *know* that I cannot really say that I'm an Aspie without an official diagnosis. Some days I am really convinced, other days I am not. But I have made A LOT of adjustments in my life and taught myself a lot of things. I can't go get a diagnosis right now because it would cost 1-2 thousand dollars which I don't have just to find out for sure. I know what I know about myself. And my mother who works with kids on the spectrum as a nurse (as well as with kids with other problems) agrees that I might be onto something. I didn't intend for trying to support the OP to turn into attempting to defend myself, and I will say no more about it.

What do you mean by that?

Okay I've not answered the rest of your post as it's derailing the thread. But I have this one question. Also your two examples of overstimulation don't sound like overstimulation. I was the kid who didn't want the other kid to come over as I found it overwhelming, and your other example sounds like disappointment.

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I am smart, and I am HFA with classic autism/low verbal presentation in childhood, when I was smart too.

I think it was just I didn't say it clear, or perhaps a misunderstanding. But I was trying to say the same basic thing as you. We can not change our nature or stop the tendencies, but we can learn how to moderate or modify our behavior. At least with ASD and its typical co-morbids. If something else is going on, a different condition/problem then I do not know.

Sir.
Maybe that came out a little wrong. I did not mean to offend, or insult anyone, or put anyone on a pedistal. To say you are too smart to have AS in my mind really is a stupid thing to say. It would be no different than saying you are too smart to be a sociopath. Too smart to have OCD. You cannot have a 180 iq if you cannot tie your own shoes. Stuff like that. Besides, I just use the word stupid in relation to everyone one way or another, including myself.

I think that is mainly them not understanding what ASD is or the varied nature of the spectrum. One of the first things you learn about ASD is it does not equate to lower intelligence and an ASD person can, as it is currently measured (with its limitations), be more intelligent then an NT. There are a lot of folks here in the very high to highest category IQ wise.

Intelligence has nothing to do with it.

If it's a "lack" of anything, it's a lack of what is sometimes called "common sense." Even that is pretty much limited to emotional intelligence and "intuitive" social skills.

Your folks are making a common bloody ignorant mistake. Some education-- a few good general books-- might help that. If, of course, they give enough of a crap to bother with education. If they don't, well, you basically can't teach willfully stupid.

Can you learn to do better?? YES. Time and maturity will help-- I was a complete bitchy mess at 13; at 36 I can just about pass for human a good bit of the time. HELP will help more, and sooner.

I'd come back to the "you just want an excuse" line (another common piece of BS, by the way) with, "No, I want HELP from someone who GETS IT so I can learn to do better, and learn it sooner."

It's very hard not to get angry with willful ignorance. If you can keep your temper, though, it will help your case.

Yes, and there is still a huge amount of ignorant Mundies who think Autism is a mental illness - at least in New Zealand I encounter this ignorant attitude even in otherwise seemingly intelligent people.

You mean that it's a stereotype that Aspies aren't intelligent, or that it's a stereotype that they are intelligent?

The stereotype is that Aspies are very intelligent. My therapist said this to me and mental health professionals should know better, I guess not. One of my coworkers said this to me also. But I am in fact intelligent, so this reinforces the stereotype.

I honestly reckon a higher proportion of us at the very least consider intelligence enough of a priority to actually culture it in ourselves... whether we're born with it or not.
And I'm inclined to believe that the two go hand in hand... and that we are more likely to be of higher intelligence.... even if this isn't by any means guaranteed.


Compared that to trying to find an intelligent mundie.
There are no shortage of them who can achieve a lot by working hard, but that isn't even close to being the same thing. You can find mundies with the very highest qualifications who are still basically just blithering idiots. The actual intelligent ones stand out quite brightly... not least because you can tell even at a glance that their behaviour isn't all pre-scripted the same way.

For AS (or HFA), the IQ cutoff is 70-80, so there are people of different intellectual ability from borderline to average to gifted on autism spectrum, as well as people with IQ < 70-80, who are not in the HF category as defined by IQ.

I agree that it's not a foregone conclusion that a given Aspie is more intelligent than average, but the ones I've met, or read the words of, do generally seem rather bright, especially the women. I'd be wary of calling it a stereotype, because to me that implies there's nothing in the notion. I'd say there's something in it, even if it's not universal.

I agree with you Tough Diamond.

See? Intelligence!