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skibum
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11 Jul 2014, 7:43 pm

Laddo wrote:
skibum wrote:
Laddo wrote:
. Kind of ironic considering the most evil drug is the world, alcohol, is legal
That is also really scary when we consider how many have lost their lives to alcohol abuse. The hardest thing about it is that in small quantities certain alcoholic beverages like good red wine, for example, can be very healthy. But it's hard to figure out what to do when there is so much abuse of alcohol.


It's the same for all drugs. Opium is a great painkiller, yet it's horrifically addictive and destroys your respiratory system. Methamphetamine and MDMA are great for treating PTSD and ADHD, yet meth rots your face and both rot your cardiovascular system. Mephedrone, I imagine, is great for PTSD too, but that sh** is pure evil when abused...

To summarise, all drugs can have good effects. But wishing you'd done drugs so you could claim your quirks are related to that and not just how you are... that's really worrying. It just proves how negatively difference is portrayed in the media these days. Drug use is still portrayed as the work of bad people, but psychological difference is presented as something almost alien
Yeah, you are right about that. So many things can be good and bad depending on how they are used.

I think DK is particularly overwhelmed right now. I don't mean to speak for you DK so you can correct me if I am wrong. And sometimes out of feelings of overwhelmedness ( I don't think that is a real word :D) we can have these kinds of thoughts without thinking them through very thoroughly. I know I have certainly thought it myself.


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11 Jul 2014, 8:37 pm

I don't think you owe people any kind of explanation. If they see you as quirky, they should accept you that way because it's just the way you are, no explanation needed.
If you want to tell people about your autism, that is up to you.



DevilKisses
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11 Jul 2014, 10:01 pm

skibum wrote:
Laddo wrote:
skibum wrote:
Laddo wrote:
. Kind of ironic considering the most evil drug is the world, alcohol, is legal
That is also really scary when we consider how many have lost their lives to alcohol abuse. The hardest thing about it is that in small quantities certain alcoholic beverages like good red wine, for example, can be very healthy. But it's hard to figure out what to do when there is so much abuse of alcohol.


It's the same for all drugs. Opium is a great painkiller, yet it's horrifically addictive and destroys your respiratory system. Methamphetamine and MDMA are great for treating PTSD and ADHD, yet meth rots your face and both rot your cardiovascular system. Mephedrone, I imagine, is great for PTSD too, but that sh** is pure evil when abused...

To summarise, all drugs can have good effects. But wishing you'd done drugs so you could claim your quirks are related to that and not just how you are... that's really worrying. It just proves how negatively difference is portrayed in the media these days. Drug use is still portrayed as the work of bad people, but psychological difference is presented as something almost alien
Yeah, you are right about that. So many things can be good and bad depending on how they are used.

I think DK is particularly overwhelmed right now. I don't mean to speak for you DK so you can correct me if I am wrong. And sometimes out of feelings of overwhelmedness ( I don't think that is a real word :D) we can have these kinds of thoughts without thinking them through very thoroughly. I know I have certainly thought it myself.

I've actually been thinking of this for a long time. Mainly because being labelled autistic has caused many problems that have contributed to my depression.

My depression makes me look more "autistic", so it's basically a vicious cycle. I don't really think I'm truly autistic. I think it's mostly a combination of other mental health issues and upbringing. I just want to think of a better "explanation" that gets the reaction that I want. While saying that I'm on drugs or did drugs isn't ideal, I think people would treat me more normally. I think they would picture a normal version of me instead of constantly infantilizing me.


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You are very likely neurotypical


skibum
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11 Jul 2014, 10:03 pm

You know what DK? I just remembered that when we turned in that massive rewrite of the US Constitution in to the teacher, I just remembered that he actually said that he had not expected any of us to actually finish it and to actually be able rewrite the entire thing in one weekend. I think he was actually shocked that I managed to do it. The other kids did not get anywhere near close. Some of them did not even do a quarter of it. So in this case I think my Aspie hyper focus really helped me and I was able to do the assignment better than anyone. So sometimes we can use our Aspie quirks to our advantage even in school.


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skibum
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11 Jul 2014, 10:08 pm

Maybe rather than coming up with a reason, like Marybird said, you owe it to no one, you could just tell them stop treating me like an infant and leave it at that. Teach them how you want to be treated. You don't need a reason just set the expectation and expect it. If they don't treat you the way you want then try to ignore them. But you don't have to give them a reason for your quirks. If you want to give a reason then just say that you have a neurological disorder but other than that you are no different than anyone else and they should talk to you in an age appropriate and respectful way.


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11 Jul 2014, 10:23 pm

skibum wrote:
You know what DK? I just remembered that when we turned in that massive rewrite of the US Constitution in to the teacher, I just remembered that he actually said that he had not expected any of us to actually finish it and to actually be able rewrite the entire thing in one weekend. I think he was actually shocked that I managed to do it. The other kids did not get anywhere near close. Some of them did not even do a quarter of it. So in this case I think my Aspie hyper focus really helped me and I was able to do the assignment better than anyone. So sometimes we can use our Aspie quirks to our advantage even in school.

I don't have any positive Aspie traits. I do have strengths like everyone else, but they're not related to any disorders.


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11 Jul 2014, 10:30 pm

I have my share of quirks. When they happen I just tell people I for got to take my meds.


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11 Jul 2014, 10:33 pm

DevilKisses wrote:
skibum wrote:
You know what DK? I just remembered that when we turned in that massive rewrite of the US Constitution in to the teacher, I just remembered that he actually said that he had not expected any of us to actually finish it and to actually be able rewrite the entire thing in one weekend. I think he was actually shocked that I managed to do it. The other kids did not get anywhere near close. Some of them did not even do a quarter of it. So in this case I think my Aspie hyper focus really helped me and I was able to do the assignment better than anyone. So sometimes we can use our Aspie quirks to our advantage even in school.

I don't have any positive Aspie traits. I do have strengths like everyone else, but they're not related to any disorders.
Perhaps you can focus on some of those strengths. If you focus on them and feel good about them other people will catch that vibe as well. You can pass negative or positive energy and affect others either way. Even some of the most challenged people will inspire others to treat them with dignity and respect because of the positive energy that they themselves project. The greeter at my local Lowe's is a disabled guy in a wheelchair. Yet he is one of the most loved employees in the store. He always has a genuine great welcoming smile and he is so nice and helpful and just a wonderful guy. You really barely even notice that he is wheelchair bound when you talk to him. I can't imagine anyone being mean to him once they have a conversation with him. And as soon as you walk in the door he just lights up with a big infectious smile and if you were down when you walked in you won't be for long.


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11 Jul 2014, 10:50 pm

A temporary solution to a permanent problem. That idea would be short lived plus circumstances. It is just too bad for them that being more like them would make you feel wrong. Be you. Because your you. Just tell them the truth. Just say " you just think that way about me because you're you, and that doesn't make you right about anything".



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11 Jul 2014, 10:57 pm

I've had my share of weed, along with alcohol and cigarettes. I thank goodness I never tried anything else, because I have a pretty addictive bend. I'd probably be dead by now if I did.



naturalplastic
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12 Jul 2014, 7:46 am

I hear you.
It is tempting to just SAY that you used to be user. Tell peers that "I took some bad acid years ago, and thats why I do such and such". Folks would probably believe you, and might even cut you slack.

In fact I worked with a guy in store who had some mental quirks (he would run back to the stockroom to look for something for a customer, and then forget why he went back to the stockroom when he got there only seconds later).

He would exclaim "I smoked too much Raid when I was young". I thought he was joking. But one time he explained that he was in a teenage gang that would do huffing-including smoking tobacco sprayed with Raid poison. I'm sure he was telling the truth. But a person could certainly make up something like that and be believed.

But you have to be careful who you tell such a story to, and just what you would say.

Never touched drugs in HS. Autism was in the media since I was in gradeschool, but the mild form of autism called "aspergers" that I have was unheard of in the USA until I was middle aged, and I wasnt officially diagnosed until later still. So I didnt have the label of "being on the autism spectrum" growing up. I was just labeled a 'wierdo', or 'sicko', or 'ret*d'. But the idea is the same. you're ostracized for being odd.

A guy next to me in history class in HS would rib me when I denied using, and would have a knowing grin when he said "you're so spaced out, we all know about you".

That kinda thing made me consider selective nonhonesty with peers. I considered just saying that I was a stoner just get people off my back, and because being a stoner seemed to be more socially acceptable than just being 'spacey' because thats just how you are naturally because you're some kind of wierdo.

Ironically in the summer between HS and college I made friends with a crowd who really were stoners, and did get to sample various substences, but never got as deeply involved with drugs as many peers.

So yeah- spinning fiction about having done drugs might solve some problems in some social contexts (but might cause other problems in other contexts). About actually using drugs- that can definitely cause problems, but thats a whole nother subject.



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12 Jul 2014, 8:56 am

For people to ask you questions like that, because they don't understand you. To tell you, and others around you that they know all about you, and be wrong about it is a very shameful thing. To lable you for being something that you are not is wrong for them to do so.

Those ideals that bad people make up about you that are not true, can turn you into something, or make you believe something that you are not.

Sounds to me like another twisted form of projection transference and control.

People like that helped turn me into a drug addict, and make me believe I'm something that I am not. It had turned me into a bitter person with a chip on my shoulder. Now that im 20 years out of high school I'm better off.

Mr. Naturalplastic. I totally know where you are coming from. You just need to be like johnny, or there is something wrong with you. People go on to lable you or try to understand you, but can't. However whatever they make up, they believe they are right about. Some of the time people try to get you to agree, or prove that somehow they are right.

There is nothing wrong, and you do not need to tell people you are on drugs. Believe it or not, alot of people who are on drugs every day seem to be perfectly normal, and these people who want to lable you think they are just fine to be the way that they are.

These people who ask you what is wrong with you, and make believe there is something wrong with you all the time, are clearly not good people. They like to nitpick, and make fun. Maybe it gives them a blissfull feeling of superiority or something, who knows?



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12 Jul 2014, 9:46 am

DevilKisses wrote:
I don't really want to do drugs. I just want to be able to use them as an excuse for some of my quirks. It seems like most people like to have explanations for quirky behaviors. I'd rather say that I'm on drugs than say I have some disability.


You'll find people are more accepting of a disability than a drug user, and a disability is a good enough explanation as any if your behaviour you don't like is due to such. Besides, being quirky isn't bad. Quirky is just quirky. I'm sure many people find it endearing.

(Not to mention that the typical street drugs won't make you quirky.)



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12 Jul 2014, 9:58 am

I just think it's sad that people (including myself) feel as though they have to come up with excuses for their behaviour.

DevilKisses, I've done it myself. I've told people that it's drugs that did this to me. I told people that because the people who I work with do notice that I'm in a world of my own a lot of the time. However, the people who I work with are mostly drug users anyway and so I knew that I would be safe telling them that and it's something that they would find easier to understand, rather than me having to explain AS and ADHD.

I would be very wary of who I said that kind of thing to because people do discriminate against drug use. I've found that out through bitter experience.

I think you'll probably be fine without having to make excuses for yourself.


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12 Jul 2014, 11:14 am

Dillogic wrote:
DevilKisses wrote:
I don't really want to do drugs. I just want to be able to use them as an excuse for some of my quirks. It seems like most people like to have explanations for quirky behaviors. I'd rather say that I'm on drugs than say I have some disability.


You'll find people are more accepting of a disability than a drug user, and a disability is a good enough explanation as any if your behaviour you don't like is due to such. Besides, being quirky isn't bad. Quirky is just quirky. I'm sure many people find it endearing.

(Not to mention that the typical street drugs won't make you quirky.)


I don't know. I sometimes wonder what people think at times. At least drug usage is a choice and a disability is not a choice. But depending on the people and culture, It may be better to say that it is cause by drugs.



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12 Jul 2014, 11:39 am

If you really want to lie, it would be better to say you suffered from a heat stroke, fell off your bike, or tripped, and did a nose dive into a telephone pole.