Can you hold down a debate?

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Debates, arguments, both cause my mind to lock up. Arguments, much faster than debates. I can't come up with new replies, only repeat the talking points that I have practiced in my head. I keep repeating the same things, stated different ways, while the normal move on to different talking points, leaving me in the dust. I avoid them, and even walk away because it becomes a major effort of futility making me feel belittled. I can handle them in a digital/online/written format as it allows me time to think, asses my thoughts, and come up with new talking points.

We have lots of political and religious debates on my teen forums. I'm not able to keep up with them.

I actually don't like debates (reading them is different than being involved in one) because from my experience, people twist what you say and argue about something you never even said and sadly that is how debates work. I would find them too exhausting and make me very frustrated and my mind freezes up. I mostly ignore what is said to me if someone wishes to argue what I wrote and I move on and let that person think whatever they want. All I know is drama tenses me up and I consider a debate as one. I will say my thing and move on than repeat myself. That is what I mostly see in debates anyway. People go round in circles and I think the argument should have ended a long time ago because no one is going to agree. Besides they happen so fast, it would be pointless for me to say something because A) it's already been said by other people B) people have moved on from that topic and onto something else even though it's in the same thread C) me saying it is not going to make a difference because it's clear no one will change their mind I don't agree with.

You're debating with the wrong people, then. In any serious debate--the kind you might find in a philosophy forum, for instance--people immediately get called out if they knock down straw men, or employ logical fallacies of any kind.

Lot of women were like that at Babycenter and they did it to everyone. Someone told me at AFF that was how debates worked.

Nope, I struggle immensely in debates.

I was part of the debating team at school. However, it very much depends on the subject - if it's an area I have an interest in, such as politics, then it's fine. If the area is a topic picked by the adjudicator then I might get stuck as I don't have the facts to hand.

Debates in writing are very different, although personally it has to be a topic that currently preoccupies me for me to have any motivation to debate online.

This is why I don't display my age.
Usually people who use nothing but age as an argument are grasping at straws and know they are losing.

I usually do the same, lest I be sucked into a damn stupid debate for 3 hours.

Generally just state my thoughts on the matter, say "and it's futile to argue with me, you cant change my mind on this", and call it a day.

Nice and simple.

I don't understand. Even if someone effectively refutes your argument, your mind doesn't change?

I totally relate to feeling like your brain doesn't process things fast enough to have a debate. I find it hard to even have a simple argument. It's like my brain just shuts down and I find it hard to even speak When I see people have fast paced back and forth arguments, I'm like "How are they doing that?!?!?"

I wouldn't say that debating God was a simple subject; quite the opposite. But I do appreciate what you are saying about debating. I often think of things to say but it is too late to say them in real life; though you do often get more time to think about what you are going to say in a forum based debate.

i will not debate with anyone who does not agree with me.

I'm usually so nervous around people that I can hardly think properly or say what I want to say in such situations. I have to concentrate on not letting my voice/body shake. I can't even imagine debating a topic that divides people's opinions.

I tend to be pretty decent at it I think. I don't typically set out to do it on purpose much, but still I end up pulled into them more lately. My downfall in debates I think tends to be that I generally tackle a debate with the intention of convincing the other person and others that happen to be listening that we are BOTH correct and not that I am right. As I understand it, the real point of a debate is generally to win and be seen as right with the other one not so right? I suppose its more that I debate others for the right to be equals on opposite sides of the fence than to truly win them. Actually I find debating others in conversation to be a good way as any to learn to see another perspective on the issue at hand.

Sadly, though I do know this to be a pretty standard trick to winning a debate you might just feel you are losing, I feel like a couple people I know tend to cheat when they start debates with me, arguing I am wrong on a fact I never actually stated in the first place by twisting around a couple of words to change the whole meaning.