Never leaves the house

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I went out of the house (apart from school) all the time when I was a teenager, however it was always by myself (expect if I was going with parents) to places like the library, maybe go around Melbourne, window shop, go to the movies and etc.

Every day, since I was 15 and started to go to regular school with other children. And I wished I
could stay out longer.

I was never too much of an indoor person, and my teen years were no exception. If anything, I was more sick of being home than ever, because the situation with my parents had become so tense. It just wasn't cozy or secure enough to want to stay there. Once I was out, at school or at university, I hated the thought of having to come back in the evening to be shouted at - I didn't know what could it be this time, but I was sure *something* would crop up, and it did. If I wanted to feel myself, in the full sense of the word, and get a sense of privacy and peace so that I could reflect on things, - or just relax, - I had to go outside. This became a habit and I continued to go for long walks even when things got better.

I used to walk most of the way from our new university building in Baltupiai, one of the newer districts on the outskirts, down to the old town (those who know Vilnius will understand what I'm talking about) - there and back, every day. I had to have my Walkman with music on, and I let my mind wander in the usual way; sometimes I came up with ideas for poems or paintings as I went along, or else, I simply explored my own worlds and enjoyed the sights around me and the color patterns from the music.

I also liked to wander the neighboring stretches of forest. Much later, when my mother found out, she was horrified at how much danger I'd put myself through. She thought I could've been attacked and raped or something, but that didn't enter my mind at the time. And I wouldn't trade the wonderful sense of peace I got for anything.