Are you fed up with autism. Or not?

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The other poster might really be depressed.

Or he might be trying to have fun at our expense.

Gray's Anatomy is SO comprehensive! You learn about every nook and cranny of the human body!

And this was a work which was first produced in the 19th century.

If you could remember every bone, every ligament, every tendon, every organ, etc., I would think that you've accomplished a great feat.

Do you like the feeling of "real books," or does reading online serve the same purpose as reading books?

I'm going to read Gray's Anatomy tonight in bed, it is really an absorbing and fascinating textbook.

I prefer real textbooks. Hardback textbooks are my favourite. I have so many textbooks in my study room that I am considering to insure them in case of fire etc.

Insuring them might not be a bad idea--provided that you could afford to do this.

I think reading Gray's Anatomy is a great idea! It's very productive reading.

No need to apologize for posting about what's making you miserable. Not everything is happy and positive. Some things just suck and there's nothing wrong with saying so.

Sometimes I get fed up. I don't like being 28 and still unable to drive (executive functioning issues). I don't like being on disability (I like it a lot better than being homeless and starving, but I would prefer being able to work). I don't like having so much trouble communicating with people. I don't like the trouble I have remembering things or how long it takes me to do things that other people do in a fraction of the time. I don't like having sensory sensitivities (well, usually). I don't like having so much trouble self-regulating and I hate having meltdowns.

I mostly just accept that I have the brain that I have, that there are good things and bad; I dislike the things that suck, I like the things that don't suck/are positive, and I have mixed feelings about the things that are a mix of good and bad.

I'm more likely to get fed up when things are going badly or I'm dealing with a lot more stuff-that's-made-harder-because-I'm disabled than I usually do.

I relate, am 40 and unable to drive.



I relate, am on disability as well.
I do voluteer work when I am able to.



Last week I went to a shopping mall. Entering it I needed time to process the mechanism of the doors and people passing it, needed to find the pattern. During that time people started yelling at me, saying how stupid you must be to not being able passing the door.


Me neither. It is hard.



I have self-regulating issues strongly, but no meltdowns, am more prone to shutdowns.

I am not always fed up but sometimes wished some things would be easier or people more understanding, as people tend to react negatively on me. Then it hits hard as I do not perceive myself "among people" that much, and some sharp voice or action is entering my inside world.

Not sure if I'm fed up with autism or a bunch of other trife BS that the world throws at me. I've been a pretty capably independent person. I'd be scared to death of having a living assistant (oh dear god).

I'm mostly fed up with school and feeling a prisoner inside my own body, but it's not autism that's causing that.

Thanks kraftiekortie and animalcrackers.

I'm sorry to hear you all suffer too.

Processing the doors is similar to me standing at a road, trying hard to cross but just standing there seeing electric colours zooming past me, and blobs of colours, all coming at random angles. Noises all blend into this deafening buzz / drone. Eventually I hold my breath and run madly across the road, hoping I won't have someone hoot at me, or worse, cause an accident.

I wear sunglasses all day at uni, but when I'm in a lecture the mildest thing can throw me off my concentration: a light that suddenly gets brighter (one of my lecture halls has slightly dodgy lighting and my support worker has complained multiple times), someone crackling a sweet wrapper, someone whispering, even someone scrolling down their screen on their laptop (if it is in my view). I always am zombified for two hours after getting home from uni.

I am trying to get funding for more support but it may not happen due to budget cuts.

I'm going to try and go to the park that doesn't require any scary road crossing (it's round the corner from my house) today, but it's a Saturday and I just know that local youths (aka ignorant bullies) will be about.

Why should you care, in fact why should anybody care? It will only be a matter of time before I find the shells that I need, I hope that they are in 1 of these boxes, even if t was slow & painful, even that, would be too kind for me, oh, wait a minute, I knew the shotgun shells were in 1 of these boxes, well, I am now going to clean the shotgun, so that it can fire properly.

I'm sorry you are having such an unhappy time, Steel Maiden. How is your self care going? Are you eating a balanced diet? Getting the rest you need? Do you have anyone to talk to who really 'gets' you and doesn't rush into judgment, just listens?
Is it autism per se or co-morbids that are causing you the most distress just now? These feelings of fed-upness tend to go in cycles, so I hope that there is a better cycle coming soon. Have there been any specific triggering events lately?

Try not to let yourself get hungry, angry, lonely, tired. Avoid stress, keep your blood sugar even with regular meals, release anger (punch a pillow, stamp your feet), get enough rest (relaxation CDs can help) and also talk about any sadness you are harbouring with a safe person - anonymously on a helpline if there is no safe person in your immediate life. Sadness is often the layer under anger. It may be that you are feeling oppressed by both feelings right now, and that's a heavy experience.

Unworthy, if you were in the UK I'd be calling 999 to ask for the police to do a welfare check on you. I've had it done to me before. I am sorry to hear you feel this way.

Thanks B19. I have OCD so my hygiene is exemplary. Regarding my diet I am trying my best to eat healthy food. I am vegetarian but I need to reduce my cheese intake. As for rest, I keep having bizarre nocturnal experiences (akin to seizures but I've never had a 24 hour EEG done) so my sleep is disturbed and I often dread going to sleep at night.

I have support workers and a couple of friends who get me. I'm not good at communicating orally but they are good with emails and texts.

Autism is disabling me tbh. But OCD and anxiety are awful too. I will have to keep a mood diary or something similar to ascertain if this goes in cycles. I know as a woman I get PMS every time of the month, I am already dreading my next one. I am trying to get the contraceptive pill to stop my periods but I suffer from migraines so it's complicated.

Triggering events. Mostly not being able to go out alone because of road danger and youths in my local area bullying me. Also mum annoying me because she is too social and manipulative; she does not get my autism at all.

Thank you for the advice. I am going to take care of myself. I have a major uni test coming up though which doesn't help. I'm going to get my boxing gloves out and punch something repeatedly (boxing gloves soften the blow).

I am angry. I'm angry at my conditions and illnesses. I am pretty sure my mum's alcohol abuse started just before she became pregnant with me.

I feel posting about being "proud" of my autism is just offering support. It's just trying to be positive about the situation. I'm going to be autistic my whole life and there's nothing I can do about it, so I might as well accept it and be proud of it, right? That's what they teach disabled people because there's no other way around it - I can't not be autistic, not accepting it for what it is will only result in misery.

Fact is, I despise being autistic. I'd give anything to get rid of it or to not be autistic. I feel I'd actually have a social life, I'd actually be more independent and so very much happier with my life overall. I might be able to accomplish more of my life goals rather than spending my life holed up in either my apartment or a semi truck. But I'm autistic weather I like it or not, so I find it counter-productive to dwell on such things like being fed up with it. I can be fed up with it all I want but it isn't exactly going to go away.

Being unable to go out because of the bullies is horrible for you, Steel Maiden, and in your place I would really be angry about the way they were limiting my personal freedom of choice and safety. Can anyone else who knows the UK system suggest some way of dealing with that, eg is there a community constable service you can go to for help? Your safety is paramount, above all else. Could the local citizen's advice bureau offer any useful ideas? Are other residents being menaced too? Could you go to the local police as a delegation together to ask for action to resolve the problem? Being bullied can make you feel powerless; I hate what bullies do and the mayhem they cause to other people.

I'm fed up with my ASD too. I've always wanted to be ''normal''.

OK I am capable of going out by myself and do anything what the average adult can do, but my emotions make things difficult. Like in a supermarket I get so agitated when people stand in my space and are looking at the same items on the shelf as I am. I just cannot concentrate, I don't like strangers right near me, they get on my nerves and they make me feel like I have no business there or something. I sometimes have to walk away and return a bit later, which makes me take forever in a supermarket, or I just grab the nearest thing and put it into my basket. Also I cannot stand toddlers screaming. 99% of times I go into a supermarket there is always someone's brat having a tantrum over something stupid or even nothing at all, and it drives me insane. I completely lose concentration because the enormous din from this small human is causing distress for me, and it makes me despise toddlers (sorry for those who have toddlers of your own, I don't personally despise your kid, I just hate toddlers in general). I have the same self-awareness as the average NT, so I don't meltdown or anything, although I feel like it. Instead I just feel annoyed inside and if I'm in a really bad mood that day I show my frustration through body language.

So, yeah, I hate being so stressy and anxious inside all the time. It's that what prevents me from doing stuff. I keep thinking something will go wrong, and I'm going to look stupid. My pathological fear of embarrassing myself (maybe also known as social phobia) is an affliction. I wish I was more confident and less sensitive to other people's thoughts and feelings. Sigh.