Where can I ask questions about autism

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I know but I've only meet him this week and don't get all this I don't want to make things worse

If you listen to the advice being given here, you won't make things worse.

And you have to get your boot back. The kid has to learn what's his, and what's not his.

he ask to see my boots and i was being half way nice to the new kid I know it was not smart and I did not know about the autism or even what it is

I get that put I'm trying to understand him and it's hard for me to think its my place to teach him anything

Parents, neighbors, coaches and friends teach each other all the time. Teachers are expected to teach of course, but they aren't the only ones. Maybe you could be the friend who teaches him. Maybe make a deal with him; offer to help him to do or learn something he wants if he helps you find your boot.

I guess he had a blast feeding cows I like the kid just don't understand him he is very funny

Ahh, a funny autist! The best kind. I wonder if he likes comedies, comic books, maybe even a Comic Con near your community?

he tells okes I don't get them but he tells them someone said something about don't touch him what do they mean

I agree that it's not your place to teach him anything, since you barely know him. I only take advice from people that I trust, which means I know them for a very long time. I feel overwhelmed if a near stranger gives me advice. Maybe this is me though, and not everyone.

From what I understand, the boy was harassing you about your boots, while you were more interested in talking with a girl. Your way of handling the harassment was to give him your boot. I think this is a typical way of handling harassment...but for this boy, maybe it was confusing. He may have thought that you really wanted him to take the boot, and that this was your way of paying attention to him. He might not have understood that your gesture was intended to provide you with relief and allow you to invest all of your attention on the girl.

You have every right to choose where you invest your attention, by the way. It's just that there is a communication gap. I don't know the boy, and all autistic people are not the same. But it might have been better if you had explained to him that you really want to talk to the girl, and maybe offered to show him your boots later on.

Some (but not all) autists don't like to be touched unless they know about it in advance. This is mostly a childhood thing, though. If he is your age, he might only dislike being touched if he is sad, angry or upset. I know I don't like being touched, and if somebody tries it when I am upset ... they might lose an arm.

Here are some questions and answers to help you better understand him.

Q: Why does he behave strangely/funny?
A: Because his mind doesn't quite work like yours, or those of normal people. His mind is different.

Q: Why does he heave a mind like this?
A: He was born this way.

Q: In what way is his mind different?
A: He may have a trouble understanding what other people may think. He may have a trouble understanding how to behave "correctly". He may, at times, seem to be in his own world.

Q: In what other ways is he different?
A: He may find loud noises (like screaming) and touches to be painful. It isn't because he's a spoiled child. It is because he was born this way.

Q: How to behave around him?
A: Try to ask him questions that he can answer with "yes" or "no". Don't accuse him of anything. Don't ever speak aggressively, or loudly with him. Don't push him or touch him without permission.
Also, never try to argue with him. It might just scare him away. It's how his mind works.

Q: Does this all mean that he's stupid, or crazy?
A: No. It means that his mind is different. Some people with autism can't even speak, but are very good at very complicated mathematics. Autism is different for everone. Some people with it are almost "normal", and others are very disabled.


Treat him with respect - he has the same feelings and emotions like you, he just can't express them properly. But also take into account how his mind works, and the advice I gave you.

Well written! Vous avez de bons conseils.

Just wanted to say thanks for the help from everyone gave me

No problem, buddy.

Good luck in getting your boot back.

That story really gave me a good laugh. It was textbook taking something literally. I have read other kids in other forums posting about how they met a kid with autism at school and were not sure how to act around him. They have even sent me private messages asking for advice. Basically he's just trying to make a friend and feel accepted like anyone else. I think the trick is to see the person behind the autism. To try looking past it.

But at the same time take whatever things he is particular about into consideration. Lots of times someone with autism can be a very honest true and loyal friend, unlike you would find in most people in society. I think it's really cool you have shown an interest and I think you sound like someone who could be a good friend/helper to a someone like him. And look, sometimes you might upset him and vice versa no matter what, that's life. You are both human and bound to make mistakes.

If this keeps going, please keep us updated and keep asking questions. Many of us are quite interested in helping you with this, so it's not like you are coming off as any kind of pest. Best of luck.

When you told the kid in a minute, he took it literally thinking you can ask him again in a minute so he did. Then you told him to take your boot so he thought you gave it to him for him to take when you meant "look at it and then give it back when you are done." Next time you give him something to look at, tell him to look at it and then give it back when he is done looking at it.

Also tell him about the misunderstanding and what you meant by taking it and tell him you want it back.