my social difficulties seem different than many of yours

Post Reply New Topic

I just think that most people are quite...ummm..stupid If I may call them that and Im so sorry for saying that out loud.
Like they dont "get" things and cant think on a deeper level.
Im not comfortable with socializing in big groups and tend to make a fool out of myself when I try,mostly because I tend to say things and then regret it later wondering what the heck came over me.
Eye contact I dont like either and I hate that about myself because it makes me feel dumb that I always look away and dont know why.
Ive had anxietyattacks in the past but dont have them anymore.
However 1 on 1 or in small groups I can talk the ears of anyone,almost literary ....but then instead I tend to talk about myself alot and forget to listen,so even then,in a way ,there's something wrong...

and I think I just did it again*LOL*
sorry about that :-/ heh.

I'm not very egotistical, but I know what you are talking about. I do find many NTs very simple minded and not of much depth. Most seem so identical in thought, actions, opinions, etc. that they all seem one group person rather than interesting individuals. I'm not overly good at social games or social politics but even when I get it, don't like to be a part of things in that manner. I find it boring and at times exhausting and end up feeling that I'm not being true to myself. I'd rather just be me, take me as they may.

I think most people just cant think outside of the box,get a feeling they've been preprogrammed in life and never question anything.
Like people without personality that just go with everything people teach them and assume thats its right and true.

Hmm I would take this test http://similarminds.com/personality_disorder.html

I completely agree. People seem much too accepting of the adage "that's just how it is" and seem very programmed, unable to see things in any other way...

I've always questioned everything.

This always got me into trouble while growing up in a very strict, authoritarian religious background. It didn't put me in good standing with the church or it's leaders when growing up, as they expected everything taught to be accepted in faith without question. I would frustrate them to no end continually questioning all the aspects of religion that made no logical sense to me whatsoever.

I took the perosnality disorder test. Nothing suck out. Slightly above average schizoid/schizotypal, but no surprise there, being an aspie and all.

That's what I think, too. If I could add up all the times I've received a blank stare for questioning the statis quo, I'd have one really long blank stare that would probably last close to a week. "Uh, gee, I don't know, dude, but does it really matter?" What really annoys me is how then later, when you get into college, all of these people suddenly start discovering remedial philosophy and political science and start going around thinking they're freaking intellectuals because they know what existentialism is. I really don't see how it's possible not to hate people.

Anyway, I feel like what the original post said described me pretty well. I've never noticed that I've had a problem reading body language, faces, peoples' motives, sarcasm, irony, whatever. I just have problems responding to it, or caring enough about it to respond to it. I wouldn't say I really feel superior to most people, just very, very different. I don't have the same social drives that they do.

That never made sense to me either. That's one of the main reasons why aspies don't fit into society so well, in my opinion: if you're not dumb enough, then depending on how tolerant you are, you may well have a lot of trouble. I never could allow myself to sink to the level where I was prepared to give up my own learning and study so I could lower myself to the prescribed, spoon-fed teachings that filled the exam papers.

In response to the initial post, I think that a lot of social "correction" is imposed in the earlier years of your life, and throughout your life to a lesser extent. Not only is your logic working hard, it's accompanied by the background knowledge that certain categories of action would get you yelled at or otherwise punished when you were young. I used to angrily refuse cakes and presents on my birthday because I was far too busy doing things that actually mattered to me, and was not interested in their ludicrous material distractions. I still don't really understand it, but I now know to accept the random imposition of unwanted gifts, lest I bear the brunt of social wrath.

And of course, I have an ego the size of a major stellar entity.

We should make an egotist aspie cult.
It would be the end of the universe.

haha I've often thought of starting my own cult. I think I could pull it off. Brainwashing isn't as tough as it sounds

can't fool em all... but a little goes a long way

bump

I think the hardest part of discovering my Aspiness was in relinqushing that same attitude. To put ego aside and finally admitting that the problem( and there is a problem) is actually me and not them. And I'm sure I'll be working on that realization the rest of my life, ego being what it is. Oh, it's a hard row to hoe. Forty years ago I scored high on a I.Q. test and that's why I'm different? Think again.
I couldn't care less if Einstein was autistic or Michaelangelo poked Chinese mice.
I mean, it's who we are, what we are able to contribute to society in our own way, and no one is better than anyone else.
Soapbox safely stored away.

Be careful. Many of those I've known in the past who, like you, considered their powers of observation so great weren't that perceptive at all. It hard to dislodge a persons belief in their abilities when they think so highly of themselves. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy in that anything that goes against their perception is deemed incorrect. Most people are far too complex to be judged quickly and harshly on a very small amount of observed information.

Well said Marcus

Well, as I'm gaining back some of my self-confidence, I'm finding myself quick to peg people. Generally, I can tell a lot about their personality just by how they move. I find myself watching people think sometimes...really more like watching the outward manifestation of when they do a double-take due to heightened arousal, stop to watching how often they stop to process information, etcetera. I can read things like that. Those who have OCD are quite easy to recognize. When entering a room, they tend to to a lot of double-takes, overthink their steps, and so forth.

Anyway, my response to the OP is that, basically, I generally find myself liking most people. I really don't stop to evaluate their intelligence or how I feel about their interests. I just like talking to them. I find that they're...really very nice people. I'm not sure how they feel about me, but I'll have their company anytime.

86% schizotypal. Yay! I get to talk to myself! Yippee!

Last edited by Griff on 04 May 2007, 9:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.