Does anybody here have a problem with empathy?

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I fall into both camps - don't get it at all, and over-empathise as well.

It can take me forever to figure out if someone's upset... or angry... or just tired. So yep, there's been plenty times I should have been more caring or comforting but wasn't. And there's at least a few people who think I'm the biggest, hardest, meanest b*tch on the planet.

BUT... if I do know how someone feels - say they've actually said "My boyfriend's left me and I feel so rejected and alone... sniff sniff waaaah!", or maybe for once I've managed to figure it out properly myself - then I can overcompensate to the point I feel so bad on their behalf I'm as big a sooky mess as they are.

Then then there's feeling empathy versus showing empathy... I suck at knowing how to do that. In which circumstances is it appropriate to put your arm around someone, for instance? Or offer them a tissue? Or is it more polite just to ignore it and not make a scene?

I have a little bit of trouble. Some times, I get it, some times I don't

I don't care whatsoever about any one's problems or tragedies, even my own parents. For example: My mom told me she had cancer, I didn't feel any remorse. Isn't that f'ed up or what?

Though I feel bad if I'm the cause of somebodies problem or if I hurt or offend somebody. I am incapable of being -intentionally- cruel to others. Even if I hate them.

Emotions suck, they are irrational and unpredictable.

I do feel empathy and feel TERRIBLE if I hurt somebody. But I'm hopeless at showing it, if someone cries I'll just sit there uselessly and I don't like crying at all. I'm like "get over it and shut up already." I have no time for tears. I also often expect people to just get on with things and stop whinging.

when your at something like a funeral, try thinking about the sadessed thought you can think of, its cheating, but it does get some tears out.

Sometimes I'm lacking in empathy, even with a good friend. I know it & it makes me feel bad. If I'm not feeling genuinely empathetic I can usually muster some up out of guilt. On the other hand, I tend to see things very objectively & my friends come to me because of that. My close friend calls me her 'reality check.' Which is good, because she's incredibly emotional & often needs one - at least she knows it!

It depends on the situation. I empathise to an excruciating degree with distressed animals.

It depends. I didn't cry when my grandfather died, I cried straight for 2 hours when my hamster did. I wouldn't care if half of the world's population suffered, but I'd get upset if my best friend doesn't feel well. In other words, I CAN be empathetic if there's a reason to be.

I have too much empathy for animals, plants and inatimate objects.

Yes, I rarely feel empathetic unless they present something to me appealing that would initiate a connection, even than its normally very shallow and weak and it doesn't last long at all. My grandfather even though when I visited I followed him around and learned things through watching him work on the building he supervised he died on my birthday from a heart attack, we were talking and he stopped, turned it off, smiled at me and dropped. I just kind of stared and wondered how I should present this to my grandmother which just ended up as, "I think grandpa died."

There's been a lot of times where I probably 'should' have been upset over a course of action I chose but wasn't in the least.

I wouldn't either.

I do sound for the news and every goddamn day there's a story about benefit dinners and dying children and I just want them to get the hell out of my broadcast. That's not news. I don't give a f**k.

I'm also I'm not much of a crime commiter. I don't do the whole breaking and entering thing and I don't steal from cars like my friends used to or shooting out windows out or pulling street signs or any of that. However I take pleasure in causing potentially harmful chaos and confusion in other's people lives. I've pulled eviction notices, tow away warnings, notes from businesses explaining why they are closed or what door to use. That's a mildly sadistic I suppose.

Nothing wrong with sadism.
Most tragic happenings are pretty hilarious even when applied to myself though when its usually applied to myself I'm less reactive and just work through it.

I have problems with empathy. I have trouble feeling it and showing it (although over time the latter has improved). I can empathise with someone feeling physical pain when I am not inflicting it on them; in some cases I can also empathise with emotional distress although I often wonder if this is something I have learnt through experience.

My emotions sometimes feel dead. I find that I have to pretend I feel things that I don't really feel; I've learned to make my facial expressions look more sensitive, but don't know if I am really all that successful. Occasionally, I also used to (and sometimes still want to) do things that might hurt other people to see how the would react; for example pressing a hot metal spoon against my partner's hand to see how the skin underneath would look afterwards and what he would say.

I tend to find very sudden changes in people's facial expressions funny (so if someone bursts into tears, I often want to laugh even though I don't find their pain funny).

I am not unfeeling, though. The idea that I might really hurt someone's feelings really torments me. I also cannot understand how I can feel so much pain for myself, but so numb towards other people. I feel quite guilty about that; I suppose I have empathy in that sense.

I also have trouble showing empathy to others. I often think I feel empathy, but it just sits in me and makes me feel even more uncomfortable. I seldom cry, but when I do it is usually while watching a movie or reading a book.
My mom having cancer, my great-grandma dying nothing, just an acknowledgment of the fact. I did cry a little after my guinea pig and pet rat died. Heck I even felt a bit down when the praying mantis we caught died.

I can have empathy if I can intellectually understand a situation.
Most often I don't feel anything (or can find things funny).

Case in point:
I felt nothing when my grandmother (who I loved and she was around me up until adulthood) died and the funeral was also an empty experience for me.
When my cat died I was distraught, though.

I feel that funerals are an intellectual experience because the person who died isn't there.

I get called "cold" and "callous" a lot. Can't say I'm bothered by that.

I didn't cry after many family members died, but I did cry over the demise of the Routemasters, around a certian date of each month, up until two months ago.