Who are the autistic adults?

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I am a self-diagnosed (or self-identified if you will) Aspie in my early 40s. I have a PhD in chemistry and teach classes/labs at a large university. My life is rather simple to many, it mainly revolves around science in some way. Most of my friends have been married at least once and have multiple kids to deal with. Not me, I can enjoy my solitude when I need to.

When I was growing up, the definition of being autistic was much different than it is today. Only those who were severely affected were diagnosed and unfortunately ill treated. I knew I was different than others from an early age after getting tested for being highly gifted in grade school. Unfortunately, part of my world fell apart when I moved out of state at age 11. I was constantly bullied (both verbally and physically) until we moved from there five years later. It was a very hard part of my life and I still deal with the ramifications from it.

As for my career, it is progressing. I just have to be patient in getting where I want to be, as I have to earn the right to get to a tenure track teaching position. I am not rich by any means, but do make enough to have a decent living arrangement. One of the hardest things that I have found is that I sometimes feel left out in life on the social aspects, but I realize I simply do not have the skills to survive in that arena.

63-year-old Aspie here. I wasn't diagnosed till a few years ago. I'm more or less "normal" by world standards, perhaps viewed by some as slightly eccentric. I held down a job for practically all of my adult life. I got a few minor adjustments for ASD towards the end of my working life. I've been married 3 times, and I don't consider the failure of those marriages to have been particularly down to my ASD. I was a successful parent. I own my home and live independently on a pension I earned through my working. I don't have many friends, but if I felt desperate for more, I guess I could find them. I'm currently in a relationship that's been going very well for 3 years.

My father was also very likely an Aspie, though never diagnosed. He never even knew what ASD was. He had a lifelong marriage, played a full part in raising two children, was always in employment, ended up owning his home, and was perfectly capable of independent living. He had a few friends and was fairly close to them.

There may be something in the notion that the world was more Aspie-friendly back in the day. My early schools were small, calm, orderly places. Bullying was almost unheard of because (I guess) it's easier to watch over a small school. Kids were judged mainly on their academic abilities as individuals, and there was little or no teamwork. Clear, accurate communication was considered very important. And I think the world moved more slowly and methodically. Rather than seeing me as having some kind of medical problem, they saw me as something of a prodigy.

53 year old Aspie here. I was diagnosed at age 50.

I'm 41 and I was first diagnosed as being on the spectrum at the age of 5 and a half. I work at a bank part time and I live on my own.

I have had only one job that paid a double digit wage, which I lost in April, 2008, after a job evaluation (no eye contact, inappropriate behaviour etc) outed me (I was diagnosed after). I currently work for minimum wage averaging about 42-50 hrs a month (yes, month). How do I survive? I'm fortunate enough to have a living arrangement where I provide living assistance and care for room and board. I have had two long-term relationships, which lasted a combined 20 years. Thanks, for starting this thread, for I have never met anyone, who has openly claimed to be autistic. And, no, I don't either.

My original post put more emphasis on the negatives of the ld days because I was describing in detail why many of our generatio were and are misdiagnosed or undiagnosed and thus seem not to exist.

Since then a discussion has arison was it better for milder autistics back in the day dispite the ignorence. For me ignorence was anything but bliss from bullying to bieng the person let go when any type of downsizing occurred. Despite that I can honestly say that it was a LOT less bad for me because I grew up then rather then now. More freedom helped me figure out what I can and can not do in many areas. Also helpful as mentioned, while it was nice if you and your boss got along it was not expected, in many jobs teamwork was not demanded. I can see myself becoming quite mentally ill if I had to grow up today. Just reading about what I can not do because of my label, reading about parents commonly going through a grieving process when they find out who I am, my label bieng a popular insult. Add to that 25-40 hours of ABA, endless needs to multitask and engange in teamwork and on and on. Total nightmare when you are not mature.

...This is ultra-fast , but , with my sig adding more details here , I am , unfortunately , a material failure , much late-diagnosed , and my body is going downhill - I'd much like to (ultra-belatedly ) finish college university but ...

...Tended towards " special " (" dummy/ret*d " ) schools also ...........



quote="kraftiekortie"]I'm 55. Diagnosed with Classic Autism at age 3, changed to "brain damage" a little later. Spoke at age 5.5.

Became, in retrospect, "Aspergian" after I acquired speech. Didn't do well socially, did better academically.

Had no idea I had a disability. Just thought I was weird. Didn't care what people thought. Made very few friends. Didn't care too much about that. Shoplifted a couple of times because of boredom. Very apathetic about life. Enjoyed reading alone for hours on end. No Internet or video games. Liked pinball.

Went to "special" schools most of the time. Experiments with "regular" school failed.

Always thought I'd graduate high school and go to college. Did graduate high school, but didn't go to college until age 36. Graduated at age 45.

Have worked the same clerical job since 1980. Got my license in 1998. Independent since 1981. My job involves only cursory personal interactions, though I'm a friendly person. Not involved in the social whirl.

Made some mistakes, but moderate ones. Still paying for them. Will retire in 6 years with a pension.[/quote]

Almost 60, dx'd at 58.

I was smart at school, but everything began to unwind at adolescence. My doctor thought I was pre schizophrenic. There was talk of me being sent to some sort of special school because of my disobedience - this was a narrow escape, as have heard very bad things about the psychiatric schools of the time.

Had a very bad time on LSD. Became convinced that one day I would go mad and never return. Off the rails, living on benefits, soft to medium drugs. Hard drinker - if it hadn't have been for my family I'd have been on the streets / in the asylum or prison.

Spells of education. Attempts to work led to bloody awful jobs with bloody awful people that didn't last.

Presently very qualified in English and unemployable. I dislike the 21st century.

In the 50's and 60's aspies in the uk would have been found work on British Rail.

There were more pockets of society with a live and let live attitude back then. There was more Society.

Last edited by Alexanderplatz on 10 Sep 2016, 11:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I'm a couple decades younger than this but I was still picked up quite late and struggled for many many years before I figured out the direction I ought to pursue for further answers, life was pretty much in tatters for a long time convoluted by other mental issues. I was considering exploring schizophrenia if autism wasn't the answer behind it all, they used to call autism childhood schizophrenia so not too far away.

I could quite easily have written most of what you've written myself. I passed my 11+, went to grammar school, where I was predicted to pass 13 O Levels but the wheels fell off. After clocking up 100% attendance at infants, primary school and the first two years of grammar school I then clocked up only 3 weeks attendance over the next two years. Eventually I was expelled because I was "unmanageable." I seemed to settle into a pattern of being admitted to colleges, and eventually university, but then I'd lose interest in the courses that I was studying and "drop out." I drifted in and out of short terms of employment, generally quitting because I'd got bored with the job or I'd seriously piss them off in some way. I spent much longer terms on benefits. I experimented with lots of drugs, which generally resulted in paranoia and "bad trips" probably because of the way in which my mind is wired. I drank heavily, to the stage were I was suffering three day blackouts. I had relationships with a couple of people who "love me" but I had no romantic interest in either of them and all I was interested in was the physical sex. Finally, less than a month ago, I was diagnosed with "an Autism Spectrum Condition" and everything about my life suddenly began to make sense. There was a reason for my lack of friends (and not even understanding the meaning of the word), the bullying, being called a ret*d as a child, my intense interests, neverending collections and my preference for being by myself. As a primary school child I always felt like an outsider who didn't fit in and I often told other kids that I was either adopted, an alien or a faerie changeling. I guess that I wasn't far wrong.

For some autistic "feeble minded" people their treatment in the dark ages of the 1950s, 1960s and 1970s was undoubtedly horrific. However there were also some much better places and the more fortunate "mentally handicapped" people could spend their lives in large residential facilities, set in acres of countryside, where people were cared for and where they could potter around in greenhouses growing geraniums or spend their afternoons finger painting. Nowadays people are left to fend for themselves in what is euphemistically called "community care" and if they're lucky (?) they might get a ten minute long visit once a fortnight from an overweight unqualified "carer" who'll wander around their home, with a cigarette hanging out of the corner of her mouth, pocketing small valuable items, while looking for where the vulnerable autistic adult has hidden their cash.

^

What a wonderful post. Very evocative of life in Britain, then and now. Your description of the individuals employed as 'carers' is absolutely spot on. Where do they get these people from?

Like you I was diagnosed later in life, so although our experiences have been different in any number of ways, your point about it suddenly making sense ... makes complete sense to me.

(By the way, I like your avatar of Jute, the downtrodden junior boy in the film 'If'. That too was very accurate.)

Hey! I did that job. I do not fit that description. I will say though, it was a awkward, weird-assed situation. I was 23 and they were 40-60 and it was my job to just go into their home and give them "contact hours." But they really didn't want me there and they really didn't connect to me at all. And so we would just sit there. I remember one guy teaching me how he cuts an onion. Another dude was a physics professor before he became disabled, but I couldn't get him to talk about physics. He didn't talk much at all. These guys were absolutely horrible at self-care. They ate nothing but frozen dinners and only cleaned up when someone made them. I was like, how can you be anything but sick if you sit inside all day and eat only frozen dinners and watch daytime TV? But as I said, I was young. I don't know how I would perceive it if I went today. Once I made the effort to help one of the guys go to the store, buy fresh ingredients and make himself some real food. But the next week I came back and he said he threw it out because it didn't taste good. I felt horrible because I know they are on really fixed budgets. So he went back to frozen dinners for every meal... and he kept taking the high blood pressure meds that helped his body cope with all that crap in his system.

It just needed more salt--TV dinners have lots and lots of salt.

@jute and Hyperborean - it fascinates me that aspergers is so observable, the sticking to being oneself no matter what the outcome stands out in the syndrome. Picking through the stories finding evidence of neurologically inspired behaviour maps (does that make sense?).

With dx I have come to understand the extent to which I have been bullied, some physical, but mainly psychological - one fluke of fate is that I am big and dangerous looking (though a big softie inside). Society took a major task at gaslighting me and failed.

Something to emphasise in my history - a marked aversion to going anywhere near Psychiatry, though part of Psychiatry has obviously got a bit better, and we've made up these days to be on quite friendly terms.

My hunch is that what happened to some aspies in the 70's is that they'd get diagnosed with a co morbid, go into the asylum for a "little rest" as doctors used to put it, then get drugs to treat the co morbid, which would leave the central aspieness exposed, ONLY ON DRUGS, which don't work on the centrality of aspieness.

The drugs might well at this point have produced symptoms of a Psychiatric illness in combination with the incurable aspieness being interpreted as anything, et voila, you have a revolving door Psychiatric patient forever.

Have read of a case in the Guardian of precisely the above. The patient in question just happened to bump into someone trained in Autism spotting after decades of being in and out of asylums.

I don't want to knock the Psychiatric industry as there are very good people in there doing their best, and if I want to blame anyone, it's Bettelheim and the disneyfied audience he sold his charlatanism to.

Last edited by Alexanderplatz on 11 Sep 2016, 10:07 am, edited 1 time in total.

Anybody else used to hang around fairgrounds yearning to be stolen by the fairground people and trained up to be one of those blokes on The Waltzer?