Need Help: How Did You Know You Had Aspergers

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Well, I always knew I was different. The rest is self explainatory.

My mom told me she thought I had Aspergers after I graduated high-school. I never heard of it before. I did alittle research & it seemed to fit but I didn't dwell much on it. I tried to get diagnosed after I had a mental breakdown when I was 20 but the so-called "experts" ruled it out in favor of a bunch of other things. I didn't think much about Aspergers for like 5 years. I kept having problems on forums & I remembered I heard about this one from afew members. I decided to join hoping my experience would be better. After reading alot about it here & posting alot trying to figure things out I believe I have it.

When reading about autism, I always seemed to recognize "something" - and when I saw the first book about AS, I got even more interested. Years later, I got two informal "diagnoses" and at last the real one in 2013 (at 60).
I always knew, it seems. I might not have, if I had done better socially and in jobs.

I didn't, someone else spotted it when I reached around 17.

At my tiny elementary school and my tiny high school, I had structure and natural support from family and teachers. At the large public university, I lost most of that. My ability to cope was stretched and strained, so my poor executive functioning became obvious. My sister (a psychology major) and I searched our psychology textbooks, looking at OCD, OCPD, and ADHD/ADD (I did see a short DSM description of autism, but the book said it was a childhood disorder, so I did not look too closely). Nothing fit quite right so we gave up.

Then a few years later, I was curious about my sensory issues and stimming habit (primarily my habit of rubbing, scratching, and picking my skin). I searched online, found HSP (highly sensitive person), then SPD (sensory processing disorder) which better described my experience, and decided to seek a diagnosis so I could try occupational therapy. The first psychotherapist was good for gathering my thoughts together, but when I realized that she was not going to do any testing or diagnosing, I left and found another. The second practice specialized in comprehensive neuro-psychological testing, and eventually diagnosed me with autism.

P.S. I was oblivious to my social and communication difficulties before the comprehensive testing.

_________________
31st of July, 2013
Diagnosed: Autism Spectrum Disorder, Auditory-Verbal Processing Speed Disorder, and Visual-Motor Processing Speed Disorder.

Weak Emerging Social Communicator (The Social Thinking-­Social Communication Profile by Michelle Garcia Winner, Pamela Crooke and Stephanie Madrigal)

"I am silently correcting your grammar."

I've never actually had Asperger's because I spoke quite late.

I knew I had "brain damage" from the time I was a tiny little child.

I learned about autism from a TV commercial when I was 9. I also knew a kid who was autistic. The mother called it "not getting enough oxygen in the brain when he was born."

I was actually diagnosed with autism at age 3; though I didn't know it till adulthood.

I went to special schools for kids with "emotional problems."

Whenever I go home from school, I usually either go home angry or crying. Friends are rare, even if I have validation and popularity. Suspicions around 8 that I'm different. But NOT special-needs different. Never something like Autism. That time, I never thought myself as autistic at all.
How did I know I have Aspergers? I simply heard my diagnosis. No one told me directly about it, and no one ever brought up about it. They just figured I'm aware of it.
Prediagnosis? I have two different emotions about it: The "that explains everything" feeling and betrayal. I end up following the latter before the former. So emotional denial goes first, before logical acceptance.

Felt hate and envy. There was anxiety, there was depression, there was isolation.
Then felt love and acceptance. There was learning, there was willingness, there was discovery.
Then maybe I felt apathy. There was anti-sympathy, and laughing at the pitiful memories of my worst years... Perhaps, annoyance towards the needy. And I don't deny it.
I no longer cope everything because I adapt instead.

And here I'm. Chronologically a 21 year old taking things the slow way, which is rather ironic.

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Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

I've known since early childhood I was different. No one needed to tell me. When I was eight my mom told me I had lot of ear infections as a infant and losing my hearing and then not being able to talk. I thought then that was why I was so different so I felt it messed me up and why I talked funny. So I now had an explanation for being different. Then when I got to 4th grade, I started to realize I had more going on than just language because there were other kids in my school who also talked funny and said words wrong and they didn't get treated like me so I knew something was up that made me a target. Plus I would have a hard time figuring stuff out and it seemed like kids could see invisible lines and knew when to break rules and when to follow them again and I found all this confusing. Plus I have always felt younger than my age and I had a hard time relating to my peers and fitting in and I had a hard time with conversations and social chit chat.

I have had other diagnoses before Asperger's my mom never told me about but she did tell me about AS in 6th grade to explain why I was different and then she started to tell me about my other diagnoses I had with it like OCD and anxiety. Then I found out about ADD in 8th grade and self diagnosed but then found out at 15 I had already been diagnosed with it which my mom never told me about. I knew I had attention problems and I could never understand why I was so distracted and why I couldn't concentrate on my school work and just do it and I hated school work and doing it and I hated homework. I just couldn't keep on task with it and I would be one of the last ones to get done with tests and school work. I did read about AS finally in the year 2000 two years after I was given the diagnoses and I felt it explained everything and why I got so obsessive and wanted to talk about the same stuff over and over and why kids misunderstood me and thought I was mean or rude and it also explained why I had autistic traits. AS was a form of autism so it shared some of the same characteristics with AS and back then AS and autism were both totally different from one another and AS only shared some symptoms with classic autism. I was in denial of AS for a while when first told about it. I didn't even want to be different so I rejected the label. I didn't want it. I remember going to a psychiatrist for it but I had no idea what was going on. I knew I was there to get better so I could be back in school again and it was to find me the right medication.

Funny. Many have thought, they had a braindamage - perhaps ever so slight. So did I.
Susan Boyle was even diagnosed with one, but it was AS.

I was diagnosed with "regular" Autism when I was 4 and re-diagnosed with AS when I was 13. Being re-diagnosed was likely because I was an early bloomer, meaning that I began puberty when I was 10.

I was diagnosed when I was 3, but didn't know until I was 12. My mom was afraid to tell me because she was scared I might get mad at myself. I got diagnosed again at 13.