auntblabby wrote:
blackicmenace wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
blackicmenace wrote:
I vaguely recall reading about a study done on how much people lie on average during a day and I was left in a state of shock that people would use such an illogical form of communication so readily. What is gained from a web of lies is beyond me. How does one form trust with deception? Seems silly.
sociopathic types [vastly undercounted in amuurica] don't necessarily want you to
trust them so much as they'd rather you put them on a pedestal and/or feared them.
I guess that does make sense if your goal is to suppress someone. Seems like an inefficient use of time and effort having to keep track of nonsensical garbage. This explains antisocial behavior that lack empathy, but what about those that don't suffer from that? People on average lie a lot!
am no expert, but I sense that a lot of sociopathic behavior is ultimately wasteful, a cost-no-object concealment of culpability, gainsaying and self-aggrandizement. I am guessing that sociopathy per se represents a spectrum, of mild to severe, and that many more folks than those that can be or are adjudged to have whatever type of antisocial personality disorder, have prominent sociopathic traits or at least dissocial traits. a lot of people will pathologically lie their way into a corner, but for the smarter ones that corner might as well be a million miles away.
I'm no expert either, but everything I've ever read supports what you say. It's certain traits, in large or small doses, that make up a complex picture. I've met some extremely unpleasant people who still manage to care for their kids. Who knows what their kids will grow up to be like? Yet they make an effort to take care of them, and I don't think it's just because society will condemn them if they don't.
One thing I've seen repeatedly is psychologists mentioning that the "intelligent psycopath" so beloved of pop culture is actually quite rare. Sociopathic traits is something that is more common with low intelligence, which is why so many of these guys end up in jail - because their planning ability is limited, along with their ability to distinguish right from wrong.
About the site mentioned: I didn't read it, because I don't want to fill my head with depressive crap, but I remember that a while ago someone posted an article about one woman's failed relationship with an aspie man. The fascinating thing was that she mentioned, in passing, that she was diagnosed with adhd. And adhd shares some communication problems with autism - although not at the same level. The funny thing is that she blamed all the miscommunication on his autism - yet did not even consider that her adhd might have been contributing at least a bit. Not everyone can be together, but at least they could talk to each other.
I really don't like these professional victims. I do get that it's hard to leave a confusing and/or abusive relationship - but listening to people who have never done anything wrong, ever, in their lives, is bloody exhausting. Black and white thinking, much?
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I sometimes leave conversations and return after a long time. I am sorry about it, but I need a lot of time to think about it when I am not sure how I feel.