Tell people you have autism

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It's still family-only that knows for me. I'm a sorta shy, dull reclusive jerk so I guess that's all anyone's likely to pick up on.

I've only told a few people. Most of them didn't seem to treat me any differently and seemed understanding afterwards,but one of them started acting rude to me. I kind of want to tell more people I have it to see how the would react to it. I feel like if I actually told more people though they might discriminate against me because of all the bad stories I here about disclosing.

Bird In Flight


I agree that there are times where there is more at stake. Ultimately we have to make choices that are in our personal best interest.

I found out in Oct 2016 that I was on the spectrum after my son's dx. Although I have dealt with social and sensory issues my whole life I never new why. Maybe my optimisim is because of my finding out late in life and I have not endured the negetive reactions of people after telling them. In my mind there is nothing that they can do to me. I know I am different and I know the core things I can't change. I know that change is needed, and I hope that enough of us are in a place to help facilitate a change in perception for the future individuals that will find a place on the spectrum, like my children. I have always been solution driven and I know that not being myself leads to difficulties and I have always said if you can't be yourself, then who can you be?

Maybe for those of us that don't feel comfortable telling people, those that do feel comfortable will tell twice as many.
Kind Regards Shark

In my case? I don't. Unless I wanted someone to know that... (Which is, so far only a handful online and almost none in real life. Others who might've known in real life is either my mom and my relatives, or people like my teachers -- others might've known from them...)
In real life, they don't have to know. They don't need to know. Because they have more needs for accommodations I do. People around me are actually more fragile and easily get uncomfortable or anxious than I do. So why would I give them more things to worry about?
The only, and I mean the only thing I get picky and uncomfortable about is food. And the rest, whatever I'm incompetent at, has no excuse; autistic thing or not. I'll ask them a weird question regardless.

And if they do want or need to know, it's most likely for the wrong reasons.

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I don't have a formal Asperger's diagnosis, but I have always known I was different all my life. I don't want to seek a formal diagnosis because my life has been on a good track and I don't want to be evaluated by someone who will limit me based on what a test could reveal on a certain day. That has happened to me far too many times before.

It really seems to me like disclosing either working well for you or being detrimental depends terribly on all kinds of factors about who you are in everything about yourself and your life.

Situations where it might work out just fine for you to be clear and honest with everyone about your diagnosis would be things like if you're already a person with a certain level of achievement, accomplishment, "normal" circumstances (partner, children, house, job, mortgage), and therefore a certain level of power in your world. There is a lot of innate power in being someone others already see as someone to look up to, someone doing all the "right" things in life.

If you're that person and you start to reveal that you have autism, it can be an educating thing to others, and they will be less inclined to make a complete downturn in their opinion of you. They won't suddenly see you as incompetent or necessarily change their behavior around you in a negative way.

Also if you're still young enough that you don't yet have to work, seek work or be in an employment situation, you are living in the belly of a loving family who buffer you from both practical and emotional harshness out there. If you're surrounded by supportive people who have know you all your life.

That's going to be very different from the scenario of a late diagnosed adult, no friends, no living family, dealing with work and dealing with the fact that most of the people in your life have not known you very long for reasons of your moving somewhere (for work or whatever).

If you have nothing, no status, nothing anyone already respects or loves you for, and you are surrounded by mostly strangers in your daily life instead of people who already know you and care about you, it's a very different situation.

Yes, I have shared this information with those who I will be interacting with for long periods of time. I feel that disclosing my diagnosis is the only way of explaining why I behave the way I do. Obviously, this has caused problems in the past where people have suddenly adjusted their behaviour to "accomadate" me, only to leave me feeling more alienated than before. For this reason, I am very picky about who I choose to divulge this information to.

ZombiebrideXD~~~"People dont need to know the full diagnoses, if i look normal im gonna let them think that theres nothing rpwrong with me."

There is nothing "wrong" with you though!

Where I come from there is a lot of ignorance about AS. Lots of people don't have a clue what it is & even the so-called experts think of it as like a less sever form of mental retardation. I was told i communicated too well verbally & seemed too intelligent to have anything on the autism spectrum. They were also focused on the fact that I had a high-school diploma. So I don't think telling people about my Aspergers would help.

After being assessed I have drawn up a policy nto guide me on disclosure.

I have disclosed the result to people who helped the process by providing the assessor with information.
I have disclosed to people whos feedback had helped my research.

I don't live with immediate family, and in fact left home 30 odd years ago. At this point I see no requirement to disclose.

Regarding further disclosure, if I think it will result in the person Lowering their expectations of me then I will not disclose.

If I think it will increase their understanding of Autism, and especially if I think it will help get the concept of Autism being a Spectrum.

I have thought of situations where I believe disclosure without identifying me has potential to benefit.

A very close friend of over a quarter of a century is a teacher, ad was one of the people who contributed to my assessment with observations of me. They have a blanket permission ot disclose "A very close friend has been assessed as autistic as an adult, and then pass on anything they have observed in me in the way of best practice, coping strategies, work around etc to any pupil who is known to be autistic in the appropriate circumstances. They also have my permission to disclose information and any appropriate reprimand to anyone with a diagnosis who misuses it as a get out of jail card for bad behaviour.

I am a part of a group of friends going back over 25 years who get together each year at a very simple bunkhouse, which over the years we have all played a part in maintaining. Several of the group have families of their own now, and one has a son who is actually diagnosed and at times there have been one or two vexing occasions. SAme close friend is also part of this circle, so they have permission to use a formula : "A close Friend of mine has been assessed as an adult. Would it be helpful if I ran that situation past them and see if they can shed light on it from the autistic person's point of view ?"

I wear identification, including not needing to let people know, as I cannot hide my behavior. It gets told for me...though I can elaborate.

After growing up LGBT in a Mormon, conservative, state during the 1960s through the 1980s, coming out as an autist is suddenly like landing in the colorful Land of Oz by comparison. I tell everyone that I am autistic whether they want to know or not. By taking a page from the LGBT political strategy book, coming out as autistic will be the only way to resolve our concerns.