Going to a local support group, but having a dilemma.

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Hmm... here's my 2 cents: I would definitely have someone there serving a role of facilitator. It sounds like that the head of the group could serve that role.

A facilitator doesn't necessarily add to the discussion per se, but helps to ensure that people get a chance to talk and helps to keep a meeting moving along. they know when more time might be need on certain subjects, and when to politely urge people the right times to push on to the next part of the meeting.

Perhaps suggesting this role for someone might help? Dunno, just a little something. Hope things go better for you!

Also, I feel that Aspies in general are more accepting of having communication straight on. Subtle hinting at things may not get across. But having said that, some tact is advised.

I'm glad that so far just being up front about my concerns has gotten a positive reaction. I was a bit leery initially because of past experience with getting into trouble for questioning why a disability service or support resource was more or less accommodating for some people more than others. So far that hasn't been the case here. I know I need to be careful not to be too literal about what the group is "supposed" to be vs. reality.

I have an idea about how to handle sensory issues. The Autscape convention uses a series of colour coded badges specifying whether the wearer needs others to initiate a conversation, needs to give prior permission to be spoken to, does not want to be spoken to etc. Could this approach not be used for sensory issues? Each person wears a badge that states things like "Please don't touch me", "Please be quiet when talking to me", "Please stand away when talking to me". Obviously these could be abbreviated to "No touch", "Quiet", "Distance". If everyone wears them then no one feels awkward about doing so.

Anyway, it's an idea.

I like this. I'll see if this is something that would work for the group. At some of the meetings we've have those stick-on "Hello, my name is" tags, so perhaps a variation of that might work. At the very least, perhaps just having it made clear that we have sensory issues to varying degrees and that everyone needs to be aware of that, and conversely, it's allowed to alert someone about one's sensory issues if someone is being loud, invading personal space, or touching. I think some of the problem is when someone feels forced to interact even when being made uncomfortable and isn't sure how to respond, so if blanket "permission" is given to be honest that someone's behavior is causing problems, that might be helpful. Personally, the way I process things, I'm expecting people to just say something and be honest- not rude, just up front if I've unknowingly talked too much or perhaps approached someone to chat without realizing I might have wheeled up to them too quickly, so yes, I'm ok if the rules would apply to me as well