What Difficulties do you have?

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I don't do small talk-never have been able to. I just can't stand to sit there and talk about something completely pointless for long periods of time and often argue with my boyfriend asking him WHY he said something he did if it honestly had no point.

I normally don't hear people talking to me outside of my own thoughts-I hear them but it normally doesn't register.

When I am doing something of interest I have almost like imaginary boundaries to things-you don't touch anything I'm working with and I'm happy. Don't talk to me so I can focus while I'm doing it. If someone so much as sits in my personal space while I'm working on something I immediately move and glare as if they did it on purpose, and absolutely can NOT stand to be interrupted. I'll throw a tantrum almost immediately if it is someone who is close to me-they should know by now that it bothers me.

I try to apply my own rules of what I see as appropriate to outside of my home. In my house, I don't like people touching my things-I will not touch anyone else's stuff outside of the house unless they specifically tell me that they brought it for me to use. I will ask over and over until I get a response to my question of whether or not I can sit in their chair, use their ink pen-whatever it is, then will occasionally ask if they are sure it is okay while I'm doing it. I've even stood through a whole dinner before at a friend's house simply because they did not tell me to sit down in one of their chairs.

I cannot for the life of me read into anything someone says.

I'm constantly analyzing everything, everyone, including myself.

I question almost everything as I've found so many times when I went to do something or respond to something, it was not taken as it was intended to be, then I get frustrated if I don't get a straight to the point answer.

I absolutely hate getting unwanted help, and absolutely hate having to ask for help with things I need it.

I don't get emotions-I can know when I am frustrated or confused, but that's for the most part it. I say things all the time that wind up with very emotional responses from people that I know, but I never know why, and hardly ever feel bad because I never intended it that way. I've never understood how questions about things could cause such an emotional response if it's just a simple question and all you want is a seemingly easy answer.

My brain goes on overdrive when I get stressed-which is all the time, and which means more than one thing going on at once. (i.e. I'm trying to think and someone asks me to do something OR I'm trying to think and hear an unrelated noise)

Social interactions absolutely exhaust me, even ones I enjoy and find relaxing at the time.

This is better than it used to be, but I tend to drift off into thought and stare randomly. Now I try to make sure I'm staring at something, not someone. I freaked out a lot of kids in school by staring at them, they thought I was mad at them, and I could never figure out why...

Again, better thanks to new meds, but the panic attacks are a pain in the behind. Another way to freak people out.

My partner says I'm "clutterblind." I won't notice when the floor is covered in junk, or if there isn't room on the table to put something. At the same time, the more messy our apartment is, the more anxiety I feel and the more likely I am to panic.

I also have a terrible short-term memory, and a fantastic long-term one. I have no idea what I did last night, without thinking hard, but I remember my birthday party when I turned 2!

Ah yes, the exhaustion of social interaction.
Sensory screw ups, like yesterday walking to the store a car was pulling up behind us and it made a strange noise doing so which initiated a small, intense but quick fading panic.

Wow, these are some great answers (by great I mean in-depth, well written and interesting - certainly not good things ) . Thanks.

I can't do small talk. I can't just talk about nothing. It has to be about something, even if it is about my pets. I was at one party where I had absolutely nothing in common with most of the other people, and spent most of my time enjoying the antics of the cats and dogs the hosts own.

So today ____ did ____ and blah blah
Why the HELL do I care?

I think it was SeriousGirl that had the following in her signature:
If the talk is small, why talk about it?

Exactly.
it has to be about something I know well or can debate or an obsession or an analysis... something or else I'll just keep quite and further my data collection.



YES. AND DON'T WATCH ME. You want someone's attention GO ELSEWHERE. PHONE SOMEONE ELSE. I'm not here to entertain you, sorry.



I think this is my main problem with people too, especially the "feelers" is that I automatically depersonalize everything and objectively analyze every situation. Those who ask "whats the meaning behind that, what are they really thinking or feeling? ect" In personal reference to themselves and/or their world irritate me. DO NOT make yourself believe that I have enough effort to constantly be considering your emotional BS. I don't care enough to personally insult you and I show my caring by NOT personally insulting you.

If I meant something as an insult you'll know it because it'll come along with a bout of rage rather than just a cold analysis.

my grasp of emotions is so weak - I understand now why I was constantly having fits and tantrums, ect. - really sucks sometimes. WHY AM I FEELING THIS!? WHAT DO I DO!? WHAT HAPPENED AAAAARG -punches wall-


Ditto. However my roommate is INFP so she takes EVERYTHING I say personally and stays quiet about it until you can feel the brooding overwhelming suffocation of 24386756235423546812347834 emotions ricocheting off the wall and it sends you into an overload.

I find it difficult working out what to say to people without having tiume to plan my answer. SO I just blurt out some random gibberish.
I also have a hard time carrying two things at once, like a cup in one hand and a plate in the other. Consequently my dinner often ends up on the floor, much to the annoyance of my mother.
I'm not very good at thinking up examples like this.
I'm also not very good at remembering names. And I'm crap at taking in information from someone without writing it down/making notes. So in lectures I'm fine, but in lessons at school I found it hard to pay attention.

My boyfriend gets frustrated because I won't ask him how things went, how he feels about anything, then gets upset if I don't respond to his upsets. I don't see a point in responding to them, and get upset because I'm being asked to do something I don't see a point in, lol. It's kind of hard not to react when I don't know what he is wanting out of me-is he talking about something for small talk purposes, is he just venting, is he just talking to hear himself? Ah, the mysteries... I've actually sarcastically asked him to make me a manual on how to respond to certain things because otherwise they don't effect me, and at least I could pretend just to make him feel better... he didn't find it funny or cute, and got angry, lol. I get really confused because I don't know how to "be myself" as he says he wants me to, when he's got an emotional response for everything and I'm busy analyzing or trying to understand why he feels that way about anything.

Yesterday I took my daughter outside to play, and when she ran along to play and we had to chase her, he sighed and said "this is what I do every time". Of course I didn't respond-I'm her mom, it's not like it's any different than what I do. So I assumed he wanted her inside, brought her inside to make it easier for him since he DID sigh after all, then we argued for about an hour over it (he called it fighting, I called it debate-big difference in my eyes, but he sees it as the same thing for some reason), all to find out he was just saying it to get a response of "yeah, I hear ya on that" or something to that nature, and didn't want her inside. Then I asked him for half an hour why say it if you don't mean anything by it or don't want anything done about it? Anyway, end of story, big mess-just one example of something that happens every day.

I can't STAND being watched while I'm doing something. Or when I'm doing nothing, for that matter.

Yeah mine would come out in anger. I don't so much anymore but when I was younger boy - there was a LOT of anger.




Feelers are strange creatures aren't they?
She always comes home and asks how was my day and I always respond fine because I don't see much of a point in saying anything unless something important came up. Otherwise? Uh.. whatever? The day was a day - Friday May 18th 2007 in fact. If I have something to talk about I'll bring it up to you, if you have something important to you bring it up to me but pointing out the obvious like "this is a ceiling", "I'm staring at a wall." "la la la la I'm tired."

La la la, who cares?

Don't get it and usually aggravates me.
All these little tiddly bits that show a person cares or some crap
Small talk doesn't show me you care it shows me your annoying.

LOL! I always figure it's just to hear yourself. It doesn't pertain to anything at all, it's almost always something obvious, or something they are going to say anyway-why ask about it?

I also hate small talk because some of the things are always "iffy". "How are you doing?" You are either going to get a longwinded answer about something that makes absolutely no sense, or you are going to get a lie-because there is always more going on than "I'm doing fine".

Either response, I could usually care less. I actually do tend to ask on-line at times, but only because I can actually see it written down and grasp what the hell they are saying usually by the end of it and usually it only takes the first and last sentence to put it all together

Despite having a large vocabulary, I can't really talk well because my mind goes blank when I try to talk. It gets worse when I'm angered/nervous/etc.
I don't understand practical jokes... at all. I don't understand verbal jokes that aren't based on my knowledge either.
I can't use higher than primary gestures such as pointing and waving hands without getting laughed at.
I can't hold a conversation with people about normal daily stuff. It either has to consist of jokes or interests.

Nothing else crosses my mind at this late time of the night, lol.

Exactly.
I interact much better online.
I can interpret how someone is 'feeling', what they are meaning, sarcasm ect through writing style patterns, ect. I interact much better online than I do in real life. Don't get the blur and everything is blurry so I just sit and watch everything run past me wishing I had a f*****g pause button or going on my own play by play which usually leaves those blur seeing folks frustrated by my strobe light.

(that theory was great btw, I do believe that was yours.)

lol, I'm so dumb-I remember reading that theory, and went on a search to figure out exactly who was the one who said it I liked it a lot as well though-bf read it and didn't understand it one bit, lol.
DeepBlueLake
http://www.wrongplanet.net/modules.php? ... ic&t=32133

Reading what people say, and writing down my own thoughts-though they may be longwinded on my part (I'm workin on that, lol), helps me see things a lot clearer. Watching things happen is just insane to comprehend. Too much emotion to be reading, to many tones coming out when something is said, words running together, etc. I hear a bit, space out, hear a bit, space out. Then by the end of it, I don't know what they are talking about and am stuck on some detail from way at the beginning

Aah.. the eye.
Did you're avatar have an eye before this sign?

yeah, it was an eye with a zipper on it. I switched it because someone mentioned it being a bit... disturbing, and then it got to the point of when I looked at it, it made my eyes itch, lol.