what are your Social skills deficits?

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Talking too loud or too softly
Zoning out in crowded situations
Not picking up on other people's insecurities
Bad at lying
Not having capacity for dealing with a lot of people simultaneously
Muted affect/ being overly expressive when animated
Anxiety makes me overreact
Not knowing when to shut up
Not picking up on social status
Social skills are often ok one-on-one, but introduce more people and I flounder
Variable eye contact

BuyerBeware,

I am also unable to fake it as far as facial expressions are concerned. My emotions show on my face. I am far from being the person with the "flat affect" that is stereotypical of people with Asperger syndrome.

Anxiety in a large and unstructured group setting.

Initiating in an unstructured social setting.

Initiating in a setting with a purpose is different - I generally use the white badge at Autscape for example.

I hasty response occasionally lands me ib a bit of bother.

Small talk. Example some months back on a big construction job - no difficulty in communication when sorting out cable and pipe routing, laughing together at her another change of plan by client, but small talk about family, children etc over tea pur my stress levels up and I tended to use lunchtime to do a trade counter olys cafe trip instead.

I just can't shut up LOL

Even when I know it's best not to say anything.

Oops accidental duplicate post

I can't have group conversations- I either go silent or wander off
I don't like small talk
I'm either flat or exaggerated with my emotions
No eye contact
Going on long, tedious monologues
No "respect" for social norms or social cues
Very formal speech in certain situations
Odd voice characteristics- childlike or monotone
Face blindness
Trouble making and keeping friends
Have to process sarcasm/idioms literally first
Don't get jokes right away
Appearing very shy and passive
Not knowing what to say during conversations
Can't work in groups
Terrible theory of mind
No concept of fashion or anything "popular"

All of them.

Mostly, I am nonverbal, until an interest is sparked and then I can't shut up (AND TALK TOO LOUD). What's frustrating is, I don't start out TOO LOUD, the volume gradually increases, with my level of excitement and passion surrounding my subject matter. And it still doesn't keep my audience from nodding off due to boredom.

In small talk, I'm only good for pointless remarks about the weather. If I comment on anyone else's small talk, it will likely come out as inappropriate and creepy.

I can be spontaneously funny, in a group of people I've known for a while, if they all are okay with strange and inappropriate humor, or brutal sarcasm, that might offend a more conventional audience (social lubricants like alcohol and weed help). But mostly I just stim and listen.

Oh, and I tend to slip out the nearest exit and leave suddenly and without warning, whenever no one is looking in my direction. Like Batman.

Last edited by will@rd on 19 Jul 2017, 10:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

WTF?

Last edited by will@rd on 19 Jul 2017, 10:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Making friends
Initiating conversation
Small talk
Poor fashion sense
Difficulty putting myself in other people's shoes
Never told a joke
Talking too quietly or too loudly

considering someone else's perspective

explaining. phrasing. articulation. although, in my defense, some of the things i tried and failed to explain were pretty hard to explain.

talking too softly

talking too loudly

talking too much

talking too little

interrupting

lie detection

naively trusting precious lil "people" that have ulterior motives

holding intensive long term grudges. that might not be a defecit. that might not be a social skills defecit

phrasing statements in ways that often cause misunderstandings

not getting when something is a joke

not knowing what to talk about, if anything

getting annoyed that precious lil "people" act like they are the greatest thing since sliced bread

Can't do small talk
Can be blunt at times
No filter

_________________________________________

yeah i can't do small talk neither.

talk about what, the weather? professional sports?

never liked professional sports. wasn't raised with professional sports fans. none of my precious lil "friends" were pro sports fans. and at this point ain't got no precious lil "friends".

talk about the weather? what is there to talk about? it's hot. it's cold. it's raining. it's snowing. thunderstorm. hurricane. tsunami.

whooptie do.

small talk seems like things too trivial to talk about.

and larger things like politics and religion seem to emotionally charged. say the slightest thing wrong, and some that otherwise (appeared) easygoing, nice, sociable, and (the whole nine yards), suddenly acts like you raped him.

and besides, plenty of precious lil "people" can't tolerate anyone different from them. and can't tolerate any views different from theirs. they act like their opinion is not just fact but more important than fact.

I can do small talk on Movies if anything decent comes out.

Forget about stupid sports though.

Acting weird in social situations due to anxiety
Not knowing what to say in a conversation
Erratic eye contact
Not wanting to talk to people

not wanting to follow other peoples rules of how to behave
50 years that never did nothing for you (me), more the contrairy, it got even worse at that time,


forgetting to present the cake, you made, to the guests
believing things others say
there's a lesson; if they say it once, it's nothing, twice it's possibly becoming an idea (of feeling good about oneself for saying it)
this explains why things have to be repeated several times, i always found that strange( stupid enough i was learned, a word is a word, or that's what i mistakenly took from it)

saying sorry is the stupidest thing to do, outside close personal relationships
don't expose others to being kind or unrevengefull, that litterally obliges them to retalliate, its in their mechanics,
they don't control that, it's your fault, dummy

oh i didn't (don't) understand why you have to make yourself "attractif",
i missed that train completely
and find it utterly dangerous too

Last edited by B19 on 13 Jul 2018, 8:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.: Profanity removed by moderator - see rules please

All of my Problems only occur when I‘m stressed or confused (Except for 1,2,3,5,8,10)

1 monotone voice
2 speaking quietly
3 taking things litterally
4 problems with eye contact (rarely,mainly strangers)
5 problems with sarcasm (sometimes)
6 reading subtle ques
7 not knowing what to say in a group conversation when I‘m not interested
8 flat affect
9 knowing when to stop talking when someone is bored (extremly rare, but happens )
10 interrupting someone else