My boss is a sociopath...

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That's really odd, to just tell you that, like that.

It seems to me that people tend to do that kind of "confiding" or confession in order to try to get a similar confidence/confession out of you, yes.

It's actually kind of a psychological technique that people can use inadvertently or in fact deliberately. They share something personal about themselves and it tends to prompt the other person to feel compelled to also share something equally personal, private or a similar confession.

Only thing is, something like this often works with NTs in general but I don't think it always works well with us on the spectrum, because we kind of don't respond in the same way. Stuff like that goes riiight over MY head, when someone does it to me. It takes me wondering about the conversation for days until the penny drops or someone else tells me that was what was expected of me (sharing something back in return).

She may possibly think you are the same as her and was trying this sharing technique to get you to say so, or she may not think you have the same as her but something else, and she was trying to get you to share that in any case.

She was trying to get some kind of "equal" information to be shared by you, whether it be that she thought you might be the same, or that you might share that you are on the autism spectrum. Either way she seemed to be wanting to hear something from you, I think, based on that "confiding" technique.

I've had this happen to me actually. People straight out told me they were psychopaths. And also that they had never told anyone else. I think in my case at least, it was a situation of like-recognizing-like. They could tell there was something different about me (alexithymia) which was similar enough to what was different about them (psychopathy). The two do share traits. They were curious as to how I'd react I suppose, and curious if I was a psychopath too, as the condition is so rare.
Perhaps your boss was trying to suss out if you were like her, and if so, she would have to handle you differently than the other employees, because your mind works fundamentally differently if you were.
I suppose that's part of good HR skills. Telling you about herself may have prompted you to do likewise - but then again, that sort of move rarely works on a sociopath, either, so perhaps she was testing your reactions to assess what you were and how to handle you.
The information may be helpful for you however - if she is correct and she is a sociopath, you have a nice blueprint of predictability about some of her behaviours and motivations, and you can deal with her in a more appropriate fashion with that in mind. I've never found psychopaths to be a problem if one is sensible of their nature, and responds accordingly. You can't treat them the same and have the same basic expectations of them as you would normal people. Others seem to be scared of these kinds of people because they believe they are going to hurt them. And true, with the psychopaths I knew, indeed you could not rely on any basic emotional barrier to stop them doing so, because they don't have any. That noted though, understanding that means you can more easily understand their real motivations, and dodge any problems.

This question has caused an amusing cycle of thought.

It occurred to me that "maybe she is just pretending to be a sociopath to manipulate you". But if she were THAT manipulative then she would pretty much have to really BE a sociopath. Lol!

Anyway. Beware. Maybe you can turn the tables on her and get her to confide/confess to stuff to you....that you can USE the blackmail her. [evil laughs]

Did you tell your boss to seek psychological help. Because if she willing to tell you maybe she has enough good in her to realize her sociopatic tendencies.

People feel a compulsion to talk about whatever is on their minds. Detectives rely on this happening. You are probably the person your boss feels is safest for her to confide in. She may be wanting to discuss how to get along with a difference, and trying to build a support group. Ad-hoc groups can be great, but they are more hazardous than groups with traditions as well as personalities.

I didn't expect such a response to be honest and I'm rubbish at giving advice so thank you to everyone who's had a go.

I think mainly we all seem to agree that she's trying to build some kind of bridge with me. I have known her for nearly two years now and have recently been promoted (by her) but due to my own nature, I don't give much away.

From reading everyone's responses I'm thinking that she might have seen a different side to me and this has prompted her to tell me stuff about herself.

I don't know really but we'll have to see how things go. She does know about me having Aspergersbas well, so maybe she is seeing relatable signs.

Thanks again x

At least she's honest about it.

Even if she was being honest about it. Unless you are qualified to help her without becoming prey or accomplice, then a professional help is still the best advice you can give.

Watch your back, consider changing jobs.

i think that sociopaths do not recognize that they are sociopaths.

much less disclose that they are sociopaths.

and if/when they disclose, they do not disclose at work



and it sounds to me like something unusual, complicated and suspicious is going on

Well in my unqualified opinion I don't think my boss is a sociopath.

On the other hand I believe her partner in the business to be one.