Neighborhood bullying victim blaming
15 Oct 2017, 12:59 pm
Aspieallien wrote:
I have started to read the book: The sociopath Next Door, by Martha Stout.
It seems to describe my neighborhood bully rather well, and has given me some ideas about exactly what I am up against. I recomend anyone experiencing such bullying read it.
I think we should make a greater effort to expose and publicise these sociopathic bullies.
I am still very interested to hear from others who are victims of such bullies.
So please share your story.
It seems to describe my neighborhood bully rather well, and has given me some ideas about exactly what I am up against. I recomend anyone experiencing such bullying read it.
I think we should make a greater effort to expose and publicise these sociopathic bullies.
I am still very interested to hear from others who are victims of such bullies.
So please share your story.
I found The Sociopath Next Door to be an excellent resource. I can share my stories, however, I’ll wait until I have it in me to write them, out, here.
I just wanted to mention (based on personal experience), the importance of giving consideration to possible/potential consequences (to you, your health, your psychological, emotional and financial well-being, and so-on), if/when exposing a ‘Sociopath’/manipulative people). I’m not suggesting you refrain, necessarily, however, it is important to weigh and measure, prior to taking action, as a preventative measure, and, based on the path of destruction that some are capable of leaving in their wake, as the result of what you mentioned: twisting the truth, manipulation, etcetera, to fit their means to an end, coupled with the possibility that the people/organizations, etc., of which you expose them to, are possibly not well-versed in terms of the MO of a Sociopath. I’ve learned, depending on the situation and all possible factors involved, that it can be most favorable, to simply, move as far away from the person/situation, as possible, and never look back.
I hope things, quickly, improve with your situation!
Sweetleaf
Veteran
Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,916
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
15 Oct 2017, 6:52 pm
Aspieallien wrote:
RightGalaxy wrote:
Wolfram87 wrote:
Aspieallien wrote:
she told me she will cut what she wants, when she wants.
"Yes, me too!"
*fix her with your gaze, and finger a sharp object pointedly*
(joking response, do not apply)
Noooo!! ! ! ! Remember! This will be used against you!! ! Do not take that advice!! ! People who answer posts should really evaluate what they type - People can suffer with the wrong advice. That bully who is bothering the poster is adept at being what she is - she's had lots of practice. Litigation is best. You need pictures and proof of property lines. Record the things she says to you on your phone. You need evidence. In court, they're supposed to look at just the facts and not an old sociopath who is using her old age as a pity-play. Read that book, you won't be sorry. This woman will probably try to make you think that she is well-liked, etc.. She's not. If she were, she wouldn't be doing this to you. You'll have to look beneath the superficial. She's no good. Seek emotional support from those who love you. This will help you do the litigation and to gain back the confidence she is ripping from you. Don't let her attempt to be a friend either. People like this really know how to hurt others. Get proof, avoid conversations with her - she just might try to set you up into cursing at her or even hitting her. Take pics, get property lines, and AVOID that witch!!
Thanks RightGalaxy,
I must have a look for that book you mention, sounds like it is well worth a read.
Your right about not taking that advice. I am sure she is trying to bait me into doing something she can twist to use against me.
She is very much well practiced and experienced at her bullying. Something I just can't relate to at all. So in that way she is far ahead of me.
She is also turned it right around on me, making a series of false accusations, that are flat-out lies. With this she is now threatening to take an AVO out on me. So I fear that any attempt I make to legitimately stand up to her could land me with an AVO. Its like she is using this to have power over me, and make me defencless. And in Australia you don't need any evidence to take out an AVO.
She definitely has all the traits of a sociopath, so I'll definitely check out that book. It might give me a little more insight on the matter. And I think you are definently right about avoiding all contact with her.
Thanks again for the good advice.
That is most likely exactly what she is doing, so as hard as it is, its certainly a smart choice not to try to retaliate on your own...I agree getting evidence with which to prove what she is doing wrong is the best route to go. I remember back in school when I got bullied a lot sometimes the game was to keep provoking me till I acted out/tried to retaliate and then of course they'd giggle when I got in trouble with the teacher because their picking at me was more subtle than my reaction. This certainly sound like that but on a larger scale.
_________________
We won't go back.
15 Oct 2017, 10:14 pm
Record and document everything. The camera is a good idea. In addition, taking still photographs is also helpful. As well, record any interactions with her.
Don't let her make you feel guilty.
If you can, it's also a good idea to have someone with you when you confront her on anything.
_________________
Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
Aspieallien
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: 8 Jul 2009
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 190
Location: NSW, Australia
17 Oct 2017, 9:42 pm
Britte wrote:
Aspieallien wrote:
I have started to read the book: The sociopath Next Door, by Martha Stout.
It seems to describe my neighborhood bully rather well, and has given me some ideas about exactly what I am up against. I recomend anyone experiencing such bullying read it.
I think we should make a greater effort to expose and publicise these sociopathic bullies.
I am still very interested to hear from others who are victims of such bullies.
So please share your story.
It seems to describe my neighborhood bully rather well, and has given me some ideas about exactly what I am up against. I recomend anyone experiencing such bullying read it.
I think we should make a greater effort to expose and publicise these sociopathic bullies.
I am still very interested to hear from others who are victims of such bullies.
So please share your story.
I found The Sociopath Next Door to be an excellent resource. I can share my stories, however, I’ll wait until I have it in me to write them, out, here.
I just wanted to mention (based on personal experience), the importance of giving consideration to possible/potential consequences (to you, your health, your psychological, emotional and financial well-being, and so-on), if/when exposing a ‘Sociopath’/manipulative people). I’m not suggesting you refrain, necessarily, however, it is important to weigh and measure, prior to taking action, as a preventative measure, and, based on the path of destruction that some are capable of leaving in their wake, as the result of what you mentioned: twisting the truth, manipulation, etcetera, to fit their means to an end, coupled with the possibility that the people/organizations, etc., of which you expose them to, are possibly not well-versed in terms of the MO of a Sociopath. I’ve learned, depending on the situation and all possible factors involved, that it can be most favorable, to simply, move as far away from the person/situation, as possible, and never look back.
I hope things, quickly, improve with your situation!
Unfortunately I think you make a very valid point.
I have already spent a lot of money on solicitor s, and the emotional turmoil has already taken it's toll.
Aspieallien
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: 8 Jul 2009
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 190
Location: NSW, Australia
17 Oct 2017, 9:48 pm
Sweetleaf wrote:
Aspieallien wrote:
RightGalaxy wrote:
Wolfram87 wrote:
Aspieallien wrote:
she told me she will cut what she wants, when she wants.
"Yes, me too!"
*fix her with your gaze, and finger a sharp object pointedly*
(joking response, do not apply)
Noooo!! ! ! ! Remember! This will be used against you!! ! Do not take that advice!! ! People who answer posts should really evaluate what they type - People can suffer with the wrong advice. That bully who is bothering the poster is adept at being what she is - she's had lots of practice. Litigation is best. You need pictures and proof of property lines. Record the things she says to you on your phone. You need evidence. In court, they're supposed to look at just the facts and not an old sociopath who is using her old age as a pity-play. Read that book, you won't be sorry. This woman will probably try to make you think that she is well-liked, etc.. She's not. If she were, she wouldn't be doing this to you. You'll have to look beneath the superficial. She's no good. Seek emotional support from those who love you. This will help you do the litigation and to gain back the confidence she is ripping from you. Don't let her attempt to be a friend either. People like this really know how to hurt others. Get proof, avoid conversations with her - she just might try to set you up into cursing at her or even hitting her. Take pics, get property lines, and AVOID that witch!!
Thanks RightGalaxy,
I must have a look for that book you mention, sounds like it is well worth a read.
Your right about not taking that advice. I am sure she is trying to bait me into doing something she can twist to use against me.
She is very much well practiced and experienced at her bullying. Something I just can't relate to at all. So in that way she is far ahead of me.
She is also turned it right around on me, making a series of false accusations, that are flat-out lies. With this she is now threatening to take an AVO out on me. So I fear that any attempt I make to legitimately stand up to her could land me with an AVO. Its like she is using this to have power over me, and make me defencless. And in Australia you don't need any evidence to take out an AVO.
She definitely has all the traits of a sociopath, so I'll definitely check out that book. It might give me a little more insight on the matter. And I think you are definently right about avoiding all contact with her.
Thanks again for the good advice.
That is most likely exactly what she is doing, so as hard as it is, its certainly a smart choice not to try to retaliate on your own...I agree getting evidence with which to prove what she is doing wrong is the best route to go. I remember back in school when I got bullied a lot sometimes the game was to keep provoking me till I acted out/tried to retaliate and then of course they'd giggle when I got in trouble with the teacher because their picking at me was more subtle than my reaction. This certainly sound like that but on a larger scale.
I think your right. She keeps provoking me until I make a normal expected response.
Yes this exact same thing happened to me in school as well. I always ended up getting in trouble for being bullied.
This is just the school yard all over again for me on a larger scale.
