Social Dormancy

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We met in birmingham bus station, having both been invited to a friends house for her birthday. The friend in question we both met through the medium of IRC chat, although we had never spoken to each other, previous to that fateful day in a grubby bus shed. In essense we met through an essentially antisocial medium. We provided a degree of support for each other in a relatively unknown social situation. (She had met them before in RL, I had not.) Subsequently, we talked at great length, and I started to recognise certain very familiar aspects of Ladymacbeths personality and behaviour. When the time came to return to our respective homes, we made a mutual decision that we didnt actually want to be apart, so she came with me. Since then, we have been apart for little more than a week tops, and that not consecutively. Somehow we have managed to compliment each others issues rather than complicate them. I am a little more knowledgeable about AS, having spent more time dealing with it, and thus find that I can help ladymacbeth deal with a great many issues that she previously found insurmountable. Adversely, she has brought a fresh perspective on AS to my attention. Basically, in caring for ladymacbeth, i am forced to confront issues of my own that previously I have sidelined. She likewise effectively cares for me, filling in the things im incapable with (such as maths - im completely dyscalculaic). With a string of failed NT relationships behind us both, its a refreshing change to spend time with someone who doesnt go all weird about stuff all the time. (Or rather DOES, but does it in ways we can totally understand.)

thinking on it, 1:250 isnt so bad. Probably half of them will be male anyway, so thats 125.. a good chunk will probably be gay as well, which takes away another 40 say.... we're already on 85. I imagine at least 5 will be immediate family, and another ten once removed, so thats 70. If you take out the children too, thats gonna be about 50.. so we're already down to 20. Take out those of pensionable age, and i imagine you're left with about ten people. Should be easy to find the aspie in that lot

i have issues with jumping in on convos

have never understood why people dont talk to me. i tend to find it insulting and it just perpetuates the situation cause it makes me less inclined to intiate anthing... cause when i do... i get weird looks... a pause... and then they go right back to whatever they were saying.

that and i often find that i cut ppl off... like ill think they're done talking when they're not.... then i feel all selfconsious and rude and am less apt to try again within that moment

Issues with correct conversational behaviour are a classic aspie thing. I do it too. We have a tendency to waffle on at length about things that everyone else finds boring, but we find terribly interesting, then wonder why no one cares. Turn-taking is often beyond us completely, and we become the living epitomy of "just waiting until its our turn to speak." If we are even aware that we do it, that makes us tend to be very quiet and withdrawn in conversations, often waiting for a space to make our point that never actually arises. Myself, I tend to not really get involved with conversations involving several people, but instead stand on the sidelines and occasionally interject with a sotto voce comment of some relevance. If people laugh, or pick up on the point, I consider it a success. If they dont, I just wait for the next opportunity to drop something in. After practice, it does sometimes get a little easier to stick to the more relevant subject matter, or if you are crafty enough you can make apparently irrelevant facts fit the subject in hand. This usually ends up with you gaining a reputation for being quiet but clever, rather than a gobby rude smartass.