counting and pacing

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On a long, boring walk at a purposeful pace, I would often count to four repeatedly, synchronizing steps with deep breaths in and out. Now, as an old fart, I have to count threes.

I count - in German, Latin, French and then English.

Why would walking around a bus stop look wierd in any capacity?

People stand around, why would standing around look any better then walking around?

People smoke, why would smoking look any better then not smoking?

Bus stops are designed to be waited at and all of the above are things people do when they are waiting around.

In a sensible world, people at bus stops would be doing stretches in all seasons and calesthenics to keep warm in winter. We don't live in a sensible world, but if you don't mind the attention, you can try to show the way.

I know right!

Like not living in a sensible world is like the best thing for my mental health right now.

People assume I am nuts and I am all pissed and grumbly and I turn on my TV and everyone has lost their freaking mind completely and I just walk away each bit at a time each day at a time.

As for the attention, I am walking all around bus stops so I probably am leading the way and apperantly I wouldn't know attention if it straight up jumped in my face and bite me.

So I am doing good

I find a lot of comfort in counting. Whenever I see a group of objects or images, my first instinct is always to count them. I count objects and pace when I'm anxious too, it creates a safe place in my head where I can disappear and feel more in control. I was getting really anxious in a coffee shop with my social skills group last night, so I went outside and paced up and down the fence counting the bulbs on the string of Christmas lights that were hanging on it. There were 71. I don't like odd numbers because they're so untidy, but it helps if I count them over and over, because then the reassurance of a consistent result every time outweighs the discomfort I feel at the fact that the thing I'm counting has an odd number.

I also like pacing in circles, often on my toes while flapping my hands. I like walking around objects like chairs or tables, or the edges of rugs. It's reassuring to know exactly where you're going and what's coming up because you saw it thirty seconds earlier. It's another method I use for escaping into my own brain.

Last edited by StarTrekker on 05 Jan 2018, 6:48 pm, edited 2 times in total.

I used to do this as a kid too. These days I only count staircases (the most common number where I am, including the top and bottom floors, is 15). I used to have a problem with counting my steps though, because it was like a compulsion that I couldn't stop. Even if I tried to turn off the numbers in my head, they'd always come back. I think it was a little obsessive compulsive.

I pace in patterns or circles. Sometimes I count while I'm pacing. Sometimes I don't.

Pacing: Absolutely. People mentioned at the bus stop or on phone calls - I pace a lot in both of these situations, as well as other situations.

I don't think I count all that much.