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SIDWULF
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29 Dec 2017, 11:49 pm

I have a big problem revealing things that are better left unsaid. With the help of my mental health team I am learning how to curb this behaviour and filter so I don't embaress myself unintentionally.



auntblabby
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29 Dec 2017, 11:54 pm

^^^ way to go Sidwulf :wtg:



wrongcitizen
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29 Dec 2017, 11:59 pm

Yes, and not only that, I fail to reveal to others what I should be. I am not good with timing the whole "I love you" thing to people, and feel weird saying it for some reason. I'm also pretty bad with getting the cues and typically anger people by not saying anything at all.

One time I got in trouble for telling someone they had a nice dress. I still don't get why that's bad. I was complimenting their decision on clothing but to them I was harassing or something. Another time I told someone I had AS and they got really weirded out and said "you shouldn't be telling me that". I just met them though, that's sort of the issue. I now DO know why that is bad however, compared to the dress example.



auntblabby
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30 Dec 2017, 12:07 am

at work in the hospital, I innocently complimented one of the patients on her artfully applied nail polish. next thing I knew the bosses called me on the carpet saying the very angry patient accused me of sexually harassing her. I promised my bosses that from then on I would not so much as say anything to the patient even if they were on fire. they did not appreciate that comment too much. :oops:



Ashariel
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30 Dec 2017, 12:21 am

^ That sucks. Seems like someone would want to be complimented for that, but you have to be so careful these days. Makes small talk that much harder if you're worried you'll get fired for screwing up! :(



auntblabby
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30 Dec 2017, 12:25 am

another employee pulled me aside and clued me in to the fact that if I was "more of a man" it would not have been taken so badly by the patient. IOW, only alpha males may make small talk with anybody.



Ashariel
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30 Dec 2017, 12:28 am

What's more confusing than trying to figure out 'normal' social rules? Finding out that they don't apply to us anyway. :?



auntblabby
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30 Dec 2017, 12:32 am

the only peace I've found is in hermithood out in the woods. not much in the way of social rules out here other than "leave me alone and i'll leave you alone." but it can get lonesome out here, just the same.



Ashariel
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30 Dec 2017, 12:47 am

That sounds like a cool life to me, honestly. But thank goodness for internet!



auntblabby
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30 Dec 2017, 12:54 am

if it weren't for the internet i'd likely not be alive now.



Kelby
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30 Dec 2017, 4:22 am

Yes, I do this, and once I realize the faux pas, the thought of what I said (or wrote), will continuously loop in my mind, for hours or, days, afterwards...



firemonkey
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30 Dec 2017, 4:34 am

This thread was brought about by my post about masturbation in the adult section. I made it and then thought-" Oh s**t, I've overstepped the mark".

I still remember the first and only dinner party I went to that my parents held. I decided to blurt out much to my parent's embarrassment that I had got drunk at boarding school. Then there was the time I made inappropriate comments to a mental health worker supervising a walking group I was doing(It involved something to do with whips). I just said it light heartedly as a joke but it was seen as overstepping patient-mental health worker boundaries.



Trueno
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30 Dec 2017, 5:32 am

I'm guilty as charged.
I try to say less and less over recent years. Mrs Trueno acts as Social Interaction Liaison Officer and I just smile and nod. Sometimes I feel obliged to correct someone if they say something that is factually incorrect... but I usually manage to keep quiet.


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LittleCoyoteKat
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31 Dec 2017, 4:08 pm

All the time. It took several people explaining how it's something you shouldn't do and why certain things are embarrassing, several times before I finally learned how to be more careful.

I still do it way too much, but at least I can remember the things people have told me I shouldn't say, and keep those to myself. I know personal things are supposed to be embarrassing, but even though it was explained to me I still don't understand why being human is embarrassing. I don't think I ever will, ha.


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