The fine art of nearly falling over but saving myself just in the nick of time by performing a short interpretive dance routine inspired by the futility of trying to swat the midges in Scotland. (Please don't try this at home, it is safe only for artistes with Scots ancestry and decades of practice at nearly falling over.)
Distracting store security guards and CCTV operators from the criminals that they're really trying to catch.
Avoiding violence by my uncanny ability to communicate, with neither words nor gestures, that I have absolutely no idea what is going on right now, and that I am so puny, meek and timid that even thinking of hitting me would actually lower a pub brawler's testosterone levels.
Discovering new physics theories of multi-dimensional space-time that explain the exotic places, apparently not accounted for by intuitive Euclidean geometry, where I manage to find something on which to accidentally bang my head.
Concealing my atrociously poor self-esteem by making really pathetic jokes, allowing me to quickly run away and hide while people can't see me because their vision is too disturbed by furiously rolling their eyes.
And I have been told many times that I brew a very good cup of tea!
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When you are fighting an invisible monster, first throw a bucket of paint over it.