Do/Did you ever hate yourself because you're autistic?

Post Reply New Topic

I'll always hate myself but I still have love for friends and family.

Some self-loathing? Maybe but that's a characteristic of everybody from time to time

My self-hatred never leaves me but I can leave with it.

Sorry I meant to say live it with. Not leave with it. lol.

Yes it happens especially when I don't have the energy to do the things I want and can't seem to handle those close friendships NTs have. I am trying to learn to accept myself and my limits, I know you can live a great life anyway but not if you do hate yourself because it starts within. Talking to people similar to myself helps because they don't judge negatively.

But I do have my bad days of hateful feelings towards myself.

I was diagnosed when I was 8, but that still hasn't made me accept myself. Because I have learnt to adapt to the NT world, I don't really think much about my diagnosis any more. I know I come on here a lot, and coming here is the only time I do express the Asperger's part of me. But anywhere outside of WP, I blank my Asperger's out and pretend I don't have it. I can mask it well, so nobody suspects it.
But that still doesn't mean I'm happy with Asperger's. If I do think too deeply about it when I'm not on WP, I start getting depressed and bitter. The only thing about it that makes me happy is the traits I DON'T have.

Yeah, 20 years of being labelled hasn't actually helped me accept it. Asperger's doesn't define me. Asperger's is not who I am. I am Joe90 (or Jo). Asperger's is just something that I have got.

I used to hate being different and want to be normal. I insulted myself for being bad at sports, having meltdowns, and other things. I still get down on myself sometimes, but I've gotten better at appreciating my good qualities and not beating myself up over my bad ones.

I do not hate myself my autism. I hate them their humanity. For there is no reason to hate myself but for the ways in which they claim me to be hate-able. But the humans don't hate themselves their outwardly hate-able ways so clearly according to their reasoning we have no reason to hate ourselves either.

Don't take a social world engineered for them and by them to imply your wrongness. It implies your not-them-ness, and that they begrudge any engineering done for the betterment of not-them. Most species on earth are programmed to be selfishly lazy when possible. Humans are no different and it's easier to make others think they are worth less than to afford them more.

I may not be able to navigate the social world like they do, but it has become clear that many of them cannot do much other than that with any mote of skill.

Autism is not something to hate yourself for.

It’s more something to be irritated at.

No.

I hate myself for baking a German-chocolate cake with caramel-pecan icing, and then eating it all by myself in one afternoon.

Bad Fnord!
Bad, bad Fnord!

Why didn't you invite me over?

Autism isn't something to hate yourself for. That said, I do very often get frustrated--with both my autistic traits and the fact that society is so incompatible with them.

Sometimes I hate myself but I would never want to be an NT. I love many things about my Autism and I would not wish to be rid of it.

Yeah, me too. I'll gladly help you with that problem.

Perhaps once in a great while, if I am really frustrated or socially isolated; which doesn't happen as much anymore because I have a few really good autistic friends.

Is your avatar the old bell telephone logo?