Running out of Things to Say in a Conversation

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I try to practice small talk. It can be uncomfortable at first, but it serves a purpose: you get to maintain social contact with coworkers even if you have nothing to say. It can also open new opportunity for conversation. I.e.: Oh, you did that thing that interest me last weekend, let's talk about it.

Someone also suggested that I ask questions, but that one backfired on me as someone got somehow offended. I was talking to a korean woman in my extended family who, in my opinion, always talked about how korea was better than your country, so I asked her about her culture, at some point she got annoyed at me and told me that I should just go read about it if I was so interested. I got annoyed and told her that I didn't actually care about her origins, that I was merely attempting to have a conversation. My sister in law laughed.

So, yes that one confuses me some.

I can definitely struggle with this, although I've improved from younger days.

I agree with others here about allowing people to direct conversation about themselves. It's an easy way out of this dilemma if you feel you need to build rapport with this person.

If you want to talk to someone or have an obligation to talk to someone and you run out of things to say, do an activity. Ask questions with long answers


Otherwise, tell them you have to do something and tell them, to, " have a nice day,"

The secret of having a conversation when you run out of things to say is to ask questions and then spin off the questions with other questions. In my old age I am getting much better at this technique. Especially when the questions are profound. I once asked a new employee her life story. And she accommodated me quite gladly for over an hour. Her life was really rather interesting. I am glad I asked.

Many years ago, I found this happened to me quite often when I would speak with my grandfather. As a kid/teen/young adult, I would often have difficulties knowing what to say to him. He was rather reserved, "a man of few words" as the expression goes, but he loved to sit and listen to other people, and seemed happy to hear anything and everything they had to say. Since I wasn't good at carrying a conversation all on my own, there were often times where there would be an awkward silence between us. I'd try to find something to say, and would get frustrated with myself when I couldn't do it.

When I was around age 30, only a couple years before my grandfather passed away, I'd call him once every one or two months to see how he was doing. His wife had died over 10 years before then, he was in his mid-80s, and he lived alone. To avoid the awkward-silence problem, I would often get a lined pad of paper out before calling him, and write out a number of topics that I knew my grandfather would find interesting. I remember one where I had about 15 lines worth of ideas, some of which were just single words, which could help me avoid awkward silences and direct the conversation so that I could have a good hour-long phone conversation with him. For example, I knew he liked and followed baseball all his life, so I recall writing "Baseball" on one line, and that became the topic during one of those calls when I sensed an awkward silence could occur.

I'm very glad I have the memories of those phone calls, because it's rare for me to be the one to carry and direct a good conversation

Why keep talking if there is nothing special to tell? Sometimes it's nice to let just the others talk of course. The easiest way to keep a conversation is to ask the others something and let them talk and once they mention an interesting point to say something about it and get to the next thing this way. Joking about the things that are obviousely or that they talking about is also a way to keep a small talk conversation.

For the most part, I've been able to convey that understanding that I'm a person of few words!

yep

That happens to me very often.

When I run out of things to say, I just start asking questions to the other person. People love to talk about themselves and they are always happy when someone gives them the chance to rant, so you could just let them lead the conversation and talk freely.
Alternatively, you could ask them one simple question that works every time, that is, "What are you passionate about?"
Everyone has something they are very good at, something that lights them up and fills them with joy. Just ask them about that and see if your interests match up.

If I am with knowledgeable people, I am never at a loss for conversation. If the conversation is superficial, I run out of things to say quickly.

I'm not a blabbermouth or a "chatty Cathy," but people say that when I talk, I make it count and I know my subject matter well.

It is hard to deal with people who talk all the time, because you can't get a word in edgewise.