What does it mean to think your "better" than others.

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"Better" meaning self-entitled, or entitled based on society standards. People try to be better that each other through competition. Do you one up people or try to buy the latest and greatest and then use that as proof that you are "better" than the "losers" who don't measure up to you? If so, don't feel guilty, we are programmed since birth to hit milestones, make good grades, win, etc.,

I think an attitude of self-entitlement spoils good character and that sometimes we have to just toughen up and realize that no matter how much we achieve, we aren't more entitled than anyone else. Healthy self esteem is developed through good character. Poor self image causes one to try to overcompensate or beat others. Overcoming great hurdles in life strengthens the character and entitles the achiever to get what he or she wants out of life, but it doesn't entitle him or her to treat others like losers or break rules.

so what does this have to do with not talking?

You don't have to exclaim, "I'm special!" But if you act like you're special, such as cutting in line or breaking rules, this shows that you think you're something special.

Not communicating verbally doesn't mean you aren't communicating non-verbally. We communicate through drama, actions, facial expressions, body posture, eye gaze, etc.,

Many people assume that if a person doesn't naturally engage in the same level and type of talk that everyone else does, then it means that this quiet person doesn't like the people around him/her, otherwise the quiet person would be talking more.

The reason the quiet person doesn't like the others, it is assumed, is because the quiet person feels the people around them are too stupid/dumb/uneducated/uninteresting to waste time talking with. So, many of these people come to believe that the quiet person looks down on them, or feels they are "better" than them. Basically, the quiet person feels he or she is smarter, better educated, of a better social class, or just a more interesting person who can't be bothered socially engaging with the others.

They can, but not always. In my own case back in Junior High/High School, it lead to being targeted by bullies. The only time they talked to me was in a very demeaning manner. Being quiet seems to make you look like an easy victim, when that may not be the real case at all.

Funny thing is I never initially thought that I was better than them, they approached me with that idea many times during their bullying events though. I just wanted to fit into the new school and be left alone. However after they showed their cards, I reached a point when I had to prove that I was better just to be able to exist there.

With the exception of the bullying group mentioned above, I do not see myself as being better than anyone else. Due to my past history, I see myself as just being different than everyone. You could say I lost part of my humanity thanks to the violence, something that I cannot earn back.

People used to level the same bogus accusation at me - it actually wasn't true at the time (I was quiet out of simple timidity), but as I've got older I think it has BECOME true. I can't stand the company of the majority of people.

I definitely don't think I'm better than others. I have to work hard just to be thought of as adequate. In terms of life experience, I'm well behind and don't see myself catching up any time soon.

This is the best explanation.

Here's a clip from a costume drama to show where this idea of quiteness being taken as aloofness comes from. Some people really do, even today, think that others are too stupid or uncultured to interact with.

I over heard someone at a gathering once say to a relative who asked why they weren't talking to anyone :"Oh, I don't associate with these people." This was a private school educated person who had been dragged to a wedding by his wife.

Both Mary and Mr Darcy in this clip think that they are better than everyone else in the room.

Everyone matters, everyone is equal and equally important. However, I do feel that those that are nice people, tend to be better compared to those that are mean, in terms of ethics, morals and decent beings. Normally those whom "think" they're more superior compared to everyone else, tends to have egotistical traits

That exist in German too 'Die denkt wohl sie it was besseres'. It's sarcastic and negative. It means that they think that you don't want to socialise with them and to talk to them because you are totally into yourself and that you are thinking about yourself to be much better and above all others even if you aren't. Like you are thinking yourself of being a beauty princess or something special and all others to be much less worth common people.

Last edited by quite an extreme on 07 Oct 2018, 7:58 am, edited 1 time in total.

I don't think I'm better than most people... unless, of course, they don't know the difference between "your" and "you're."

I suppose that they think that you're being smug, and snobbish. And not just standoffish.

In reality it might even be the opposite:that you're afraid of not knowing what to say, or how to make small talk.

But regardless of your reasons for being quiet, its odd that they would project that motivation on to you.

I might be something about your demeanor beyond being just quiet and a wallflower. Some kind of facial expressions or something you make. But it sounds like they are projecting a lot of their own insecurity on you.

They are trying to say that they think that you act like you are morally superior to them and do not have to talk to or interact with them as a result.




It appears, to me, that almost everyone else, usually talks too much and too loudly. About nothing

They act like they are better than me,, when they act like every thought and emotion that goes through their head is the latest greatest scientific invention. And when I make the mistake of saying the slightest thing, they grunt "huh" and "what" . As if that is the etiquette equivalent of "excuse me"

Maybe they sense that silence is smarter than their own average conversation, and can't find any other way to complain about you.

"When you have become a great hunter, better than the others in your lodge, you should go out into the forest and search until you have found the oldest, mightiest tree there. Then, you should tell that tree how great you are."
- from the laws of the Eastern Algonquin
(which ran to three pages total)

I wished it but you are wrong. They are unable to recognise a girl that they don't like as beeing smarter. It simply means she is distant because she thinks of herself of being to good to be with the others. NT girls just tell this nasty way to keep others from liking her. I think hollowmoon looks pretty nice otherwise they wouldn't tell this way about her.