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Why do nuerotypicals view being "quiet" as a bad thing?

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TUF
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24 Apr 2019, 1:25 pm

Fnord wrote:
Teach51 wrote:
... In NT culture quiet is often equated with troubled...
Being quiet is also equated with being sneaky, stuck-up, or scheming on some nefarious plot. People accused me of these things when I only trying to NOT draw attention to myself. They would also imagine that my sex life was kinky, perverted, or just plain weird when I didn't even have a sex life!

When one person who is hardly ever upset about something, suddenly raises their voice, the world turns upside down and seems to come to an end... it is often the quietest lamb that can have the roar of a lion.


This is what I want to do but I want to do it in a classier way than what my detractors do



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24 Apr 2019, 1:34 pm

Fnord wrote:
Teach51 wrote:
Fnord: Yes, the lion's roar comes when you finally cannot take any more. The quiet, abused lamb finally speaks out for himself. Bullies are the biggest cowards often. Many of those who made my life a misery are terrified of me now.
The bullies stopped picking on me once I laid their leader out cold in the middle of the street with one punch to the face. Something like this, only without the arena or the referee:



A "lucky" shot on my part, but everything changed for the better after that.





I am impressed :!:


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Fnord
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24 Apr 2019, 1:42 pm

Teach51 wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Teach51 wrote:
Fnord: Yes, the lion's roar comes when you finally cannot take any more. The quiet, abused lamb finally speaks out for himself. Bullies are the biggest cowards often. Many of those who made my life a misery are terrified of me now.
The bullies stopped picking on me once I laid their leader out cold in the middle of the street with one punch to the face. Something like this, only without the arena or the referee ... A "lucky" shot on my part, but everything changed for the better after that.
I am impressed.
Don't be. As I said, it was a "lucky" shot that, if it hadn't landed, would have ended up causing more trouble for me all around.

As it was, there were about a half-dozen teachers in the upstairs library window who witnessed the whole thing, and every one of them vouched for me to the principal. I came away with a lecture and some sore knuckles, while the other kid had to sit in the nurse's office with a wad of cotton up his nose and the principal shouting in his face.



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24 Apr 2019, 1:56 pm

Fnord wrote:
Teach51 wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Teach51 wrote:
Fnord: Yes, the lion's roar comes when you finally cannot take any more. The quiet, abused lamb finally speaks out for himself. Bullies are the biggest cowards often. Many of those who made my life a misery are terrified of me now.
The bullies stopped picking on me once I laid their leader out cold in the middle of the street with one punch to the face. Something like this, only without the arena or the referee ... A "lucky" shot on my part, but everything changed for the better after that.
I am impressed.
Don't be. As I said, it was a "lucky" shot that, if it hadn't landed, would have ended up causing more trouble for me all around.

As it was, there were about a half-dozen teachers in the upstairs library window who witnessed the whole thing, and every one of them vouched for me to the principal. I came away with a lecture and some sore knuckles, while the other kid had to sit in the nurse's office with a wad of cotton up his nose and the principal shouting in his face.



Lol still impressed :lol:

I don't believe in luck, but divine providence, you know that already, and no I cannot prove it. :wink: Would have looooved to see that punch.


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24 Apr 2019, 1:59 pm

Teach51 wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Teach51 wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Teach51 wrote:
Fnord: Yes, the lion's roar comes when you finally cannot take any more. The quiet, abused lamb finally speaks out for himself. Bullies are the biggest cowards often. Many of those who made my life a misery are terrified of me now.
The bullies stopped picking on me once I laid their leader out cold in the middle of the street with one punch to the face. Something like this, only without the arena or the referee ... A "lucky" shot on my part, but everything changed for the better after that.
I am impressed.
Don't be. As I said, it was a "lucky" shot that, if it hadn't landed, would have ended up causing more trouble for me all around. As it was, there were about a half-dozen teachers in the upstairs library window who witnessed the whole thing, and every one of them vouched for me to the principal. I came away with a lecture and some sore knuckles, while the other kid had to sit in the nurse's office with a wad of cotton up his nose and the principal shouting in his face.
Lol still impressed ... I don't believe in luck, but divine providence, you know that already, and no I cannot prove it. Would have looooved to see that punch.
I don't believe in "luck", either, which is why I usually put the word on quotes. Too bad that this happened decades before everyone carried a cell phone. I would love to replay it at every class reunion.



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25 Apr 2019, 11:05 pm

There are a lot of people that are uncomfortable with silence. They often will feel a need that that quiet needs to be filled with some kind of noise. Some of those people also are not comfortable with their own thoughts. If things are quiet, then all they have for noise is what is in their head. You might be surprised how many people are kind of afraid of thinking too deep into themselves.

There's certain preconceptions about those that are quiet, they're rude, they're angry, they're a stick in the mud, they're not friendly, they want to be alone, etc. There are positive ones too but I think more people tend to focus on the negative out of caution. I had a former classmate that once said, "It's usually the quiet ones" in reference to the people that end up being crazy and doing some nutty or violent act. This was just one person, but I think it validates that the idea is out there, that quiet people are a kind of sleeping threat. It's not true of course, a quiet person is probably no more likely to chop your hand off than a talkative one. But you'd probably see the talkative threat coming and maybe not so much from the quiet one. This of course is an added worry, the quiet person is seen as being less predictable.

What it may boil down to is a fear of the unknown.


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26 Apr 2019, 3:22 am

Some people have a self esteem issue and they think that if someone is quiet they're bored about what they say.



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26 Apr 2019, 2:20 pm

I did a poor job explaining this.

NT's don't like anyone who is out of the norm, including loud or talkative people. There has to be absolute uniformity in the cues of a social situation, and being quiet or loud is simply ways that the control is lost. I've been treated like s**t for being loud and to my perspective, absolutely everyone is quiet. In fact, people are overly quiet. The gaps between conversations leave the whole room feeling empty because I can't read cues, which is fine but hard to control.



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26 Apr 2019, 8:20 pm

They talk too much and too loudly and there are too many of them

They act like every slightest thing is the funniest thing in the world

Someone asked the bus driver if she could get off. Answer no. Some idiot burst out laughing





They act like they have a moral right to be happy at all times

And if they are not happy, someone must have violated their stupidass "rights"



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27 Apr 2019, 10:40 am

shortfatbalduglyman wrote:
They talk too much and too loudly and there are too many of them

They act like every slightest thing is the funniest thing in the world

Someone asked the bus driver if she could get off. Answer no. Some idiot burst out laughing





They act like they have a moral right to be happy at all times

And if they are not happy, someone must have violated their stupidass "rights"


Everyone does have the right to be happy, everyone. If we don't know how then we had better learn.


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