How do you cope with the intolerance and misunderstanding?

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It's a Spectrum thing to both be misinterpreted and misinterpret, so we will likely never know.
It just reminded me of our home idiom "little Chinese hands" that means any work requiring incredible patience and dexterity.

I sense, perhaps, that an accumulation of these little incidents made this particular incident really irritating to Alien.

It's somewhat close to a sense that it's "the straw that broke the camel's back"---understandable, definitely.

Still, though, I don't believe Alien should interpret this as a reason to just "give up" on NT's, or on people in general.

This is where I believe that misunderstanding other people's cognitive state is not just an autism trait, otherwise non-autistics would understand us a lot better.
I might be wrong, but it's likely your boss has unfolded plenty of tables before and was easy to him, and so didn't think that it would be hard for you. It's what most humans think in most situations; if one person finds something easy or fun or whatever, they assume others think the same way.
It's just a shame that only autistics are accused of having this trait, when in reality most humans are guilty of this.

I struggle at unfolding tables as well. Like the OP, I'm not dumb. It is really embarrassing at times. Writing and typing are the only things I do really well with my hands. I'm clumsy with other skills, as the OP mentioned.

How Do I Cope With The Intolerance And Misunderstanding?

I avoid people whenever it is humanly possible...
Simples...

You can bring an NT to logic...
But you can't make them think...<shrug>
Only took 50 years to work that one out...

Worst thing that happens is bursting into tears, but that's relatively rare.

The tone of voice is key.

From the words alone its impossible to tell WHAT your boss was trying to convey. Could be either a put down, or a klutzy attempt at supportive humor.

But if he had a bit of a growl in his voice that conveyed anger then, yes, it was probably a sarcastic put down.

Back to the original question, my best ways of coping with misunderstanding is asking for clarifications.
It wasn't easy at the beginning, I have quite a fragile ego and I felt ashamed of not understanding - but then I saw that the people I respected the most (like my Math teacher in sec school) did not make any fuss about being wrong - they just corrected themselves. That was classy. That impressed me. I wanted to be like them.

I still feel the sting of shame or jealousy but over time it became easier. A lot of conflict stems out of misunderstandings and it's not just an Aspie thing.

When it comes to intolerance, KK already said - developing thick skin. Why should I care for an opinion of some intolerant jerk? Just shrug it off and focus on doing your part of the job.

^ I'm agree with NP it's almost impossible to tell what the Boss's intention was with that comment unless you know him , know his his humour and know when he's pissed off.

Sounds a bit like work banter.

IMO the best way to deal with this is to out bant the banter , make them or work colleagues laugh and you've won.

It's a dangerous game to play in the work place and it can easily backfire especially if a boss is involved.

I would of taken the comment as banter or sarcasm as I couldn't open the table at that moment.

I probably would of fired back with something like "You do it then , Mr PHD in Bants " or "I have a PHD but it's in 'I'm gonna kick your judgemental arse if you don't shut up' ".

This is how I would deal with it but it's not recommended for everyone.

You can laugh along, if you want

But please do not worry about it too much

Your boss did not think about his statement, as much as you thought about his statement

Any statement could be misinterpreted

Give the benefit of the doubt, if you want


Plenty of times I got fired


At least your boss wasn't angry and didn't fire you


Nobody is nice all the time


Maybe you misunderstood his statement


But whatever


A "failure" or success, has nothing to do with a table




Please worry about the Maslow's hierarchy of needs