Puppy Eyes
Is it established that the same feedback loop exists in human-human eye contact? It seems likely.
As AS people, avoiding eye contact may mean, as you said, that we are "missing out," but it may also be a defense mechanism. Dogs are honest and straightforward in their feelings, and their eye contact reflects this. This isn't always the case with humans.
Skilled NT humans can use eye contact for bonding, but also for deception and manipulation. For some of us, looking into certain NT eyes might be like a bird looking into the eyes of a cobra.
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"Donkeys live a long time. None of you has ever seen a dead donkey."
Benjamin the Donkey wrote:
Skilled NT humans can use eye contact for bonding, but also for deception and manipulation. For some of us, looking into certain NT eyes might be like a bird looking into the eyes of a cobra.
And I suspect many NTs have also been burned by deception and manipulation. But I suspect that NTs have learned another instinctive trait. The ability to read emotions from the eyes. The eyes, eyelids, eyebrows and orbicularis oculi muscle play a major role in projecting emotions and the degree of emotions.
Psychologist Paul Ekman, an authority on facial expressions, says that of the 23 facial expressions relating to human emotion, about one-third involve the eyes. Not being able to see a person's eyes greatly reduces our ability to infer his or her emotions. For example, telling a fake smile from a real one can be difficult; but if the person who is smiling is wearing shades then detecting the sham smile is almost impossible. In a real smile, a muscle called the orbicularis oculi is activated, creating a hard-to-fake crinkling around the eyes. The eyes truly are the windows to the soul.
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jimmy m wrote:
I had many dogs during my lifetime. Most of these I obtained when they were puppies. When I pick them up and gaze into their puppy eyes, I immediately sense a form of affection. I gaze into their eyes and a type of bonding occurs, it melts my heart.
I came across an article yesterday that referenced an interesting study. So I tracked it down today. It is called Oxytocin-gaze positive loop and the coevolution of human-dog bonds by Miho Nagasawa et. al.. Here is a link: https://science.sciencemag.org/content/348/6232/333
The study shows that "gazing behavior from dogs, but not wolves, increased urinary oxytocin concentrations in owners, which consequently facilitated owners’ affiliation and increased oxytocin concentration in dogs. Further, nasally administered oxytocin increased gazing behavior in dogs, which in turn increased urinary oxytocin concentrations in owners. These findings support the existence of an interspecies oxytocin-mediated positive loop facilitated and modulated by gazing, which may have supported the coevolution of human-dog bonding by engaging common modes of communicating social attachment."
In other words gazing into a puppy's eyes sets off a hormonal chain both in a human and a puppy that produces a bonding experience.
One of the differences between NTs and Aspies is that Aspies do not make very good eye contact. In other words when I do not gaze into someones eyes I am defeating a common instinctive trait used by NTs to bond with other NTs. I do not trigger a release an oxytocin hormonal chain that signals to them that I am friendly.
I came across an article yesterday that referenced an interesting study. So I tracked it down today. It is called Oxytocin-gaze positive loop and the coevolution of human-dog bonds by Miho Nagasawa et. al.. Here is a link: https://science.sciencemag.org/content/348/6232/333
The study shows that "gazing behavior from dogs, but not wolves, increased urinary oxytocin concentrations in owners, which consequently facilitated owners’ affiliation and increased oxytocin concentration in dogs. Further, nasally administered oxytocin increased gazing behavior in dogs, which in turn increased urinary oxytocin concentrations in owners. These findings support the existence of an interspecies oxytocin-mediated positive loop facilitated and modulated by gazing, which may have supported the coevolution of human-dog bonding by engaging common modes of communicating social attachment."
In other words gazing into a puppy's eyes sets off a hormonal chain both in a human and a puppy that produces a bonding experience.
One of the differences between NTs and Aspies is that Aspies do not make very good eye contact. In other words when I do not gaze into someones eyes I am defeating a common instinctive trait used by NTs to bond with other NTs. I do not trigger a release an oxytocin hormonal chain that signals to them that I am friendly.
This is new to me.
Fascinating.
BTW, I am an autist who has no trouble looking into people's eyes.
I have had to learn to inhibit eye-contact.
Doesn't seem to help me with interpersonal relationships with people. <chuckle>
Sheldon's smile.
Fake or genuine?