Is it Aspergers or anxiety and depression why I struggle?

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Friendly teasing: If you're going to write your book "Growing up in the Vile Belt" you'll need to have a next Chapter, whatever it may be. Chapter 9... Chapter 8 can't take up the whole book.

Anxiety is my main problem and often becomes a barrier of achieving some goals. I can't work in public places because interacting with the general public makes me clam up and I have difficulties being in authority. If I know a customer is upset but solving their issue will go against the company's policies (for example they want a refund on a non-returnable item), the fact that they're upset will make me so upset myself that I'll end up breaking the policy just to make them happy. And that could cost me my job.

Also anxiety is stopping me from having children, because of my severely low pain tolerance (childbirth), severe phobia of sickness (morning sickness then my child picking up stomach bugs), and fears of passing on my autism or ADHD to my child, which is more likely than the average NT because I have it myself.

Also my fears and anxieties stop me from having fun. I don't drink because of anxiety about embarrassing myself or having a hangover. I can't swim well because I'm scared of drowning (it's nearly happened before). I can't go on rides any more because of my poor balance, which makes me anxious about throwing up. I can't have sex properly because it seems to severely hurt.

These sorts of anxiety issues are hardwired into my brain and cannot be "cured" by medication, particularly being hypersensitive to pain.

I thought I hadn’t posted a topic asking the question in the title but looked through my posts to make sure.

Life can be difficult, especially when we are faced with an extra burden to carry. Anxiety and depression have been with me for as long as I can remember. I had a GP who would blame my physical pain on depression. That drove me nuts, pain and depression go hand in hand. Each feeding off the other. In the end, I just kept the pain to myself.

I hope you find some peace with the world you live in. It is a tall order and I wish you luck.

A totally off-topic comment, I've been reading books from the 1930s. One, "Native Son" by Richard Wright talked about how shame and guilt can be expressed as hatred. Other authors also made the same point as they described the turmoil in the early 1900s. The realization that hate from self-loathing was common behavior changed the way I saw conflicts that have plagued me. It is not always my fault that someone hates me, sometimes it is a reaction to their own bad behavior.

I think that you suffer from depression and anxiety.