Stimming with Clothes

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It's a great one! As I'm about to quit smoking I'll have to find a new one as I usually just fidget my my lighter and rub it / spin it round.

In my one year in the late 1990s of teaching math at a all-boys Catholic school—

when giving a math test and standing in the back of the room, at any one time, maybe 4 students out of 25 would be bouncing a knee.

And during the entire test, maybe 12 students overall would have engaged in this knee bouncing behavior at some point during the test.

———————

Also consider that poker players will sometimes rhymically fiddle with chips. And I think for the same reasons we do, to help take the edge off stress, and to maintain a higher than average level of concentration.

I’m very sorry you’re mocked. That’s royally uncool of people, and damn unnecessary.

As far as alcohol, my dad’s had a drinking problem, so I feel I have to be pretty careful.

Pre-Covid . . .

There was a bar I enjoyed, especially on Sunday nights when they had loud karaoke music, football on TV, and me surfing the web on my phone. It was like a total sensory immersion. I could nurse a beer a long time, two beers even longer.

And then suddenly, I had enough of the overload.

It was like I was mentally and emotionally filled. Fortunately, if you paid cash, you paid as you go. So, I didn’t have to get the attention of the bartender, wait for change.

I could just leave.

But for a while, it was part of my regular schedule. Wednesdays were also good, but didn’t have the football (American tackle football).

Yeah I totally get it. I'm like that often.. I go out and suddenly I feel satisfied and have had enough. It's why I didn't go out with friends much. But they don't talk to me anymore anyway. But I have problem drinking behaviour and my dad was an alcoholic so I'm told but I don't believe anything I'm told anymore except this one thing or two because I remember it like yesterday when I was 4 and watching him at the sink taking pills in order to take his life plus trying to kill my mom and my sister and I hitting him and forcing him off her. Then this in turn makes me hate on myself as I kinda did someone similar few years back. Anyway I've no idea where that came from. But people bring out the worst in me and i tend to bring out the most hated qualities that I see in people as a kinda revenge on myself or towards others completely disregarding my own intentions that are genuine and adopting everything from everyone I despise so I don't rage on others as I would no doubt push people into on coming traffic or worse. This is what being mocked and not fitting in does to ones mind. As for the stimming with your leg I've observed this is pretty common and seems to be acceptable for most people unless you're me as some idiot I used to hang around would often tell me to stop it as he deemed it was from being ... well nervous I guess and actually f him. I was comforting myself and am probably the worlds biggest stimmer of this kind and have done this my entire life now I think about it.

Okay, we all have violence inside us. If for no other reason than we’re social monkeys and we’re into dominance hierarchies.

Yeah, it is bad that you pulled a similar scene as your father.

The irony is that small remedies may make all the difference in the world. For example, the cross-hand grib. If someone is starting to get right in your face and you feel that tiger welling, reach across with your dominant hand and put it on their opposite shoulder. It’s physical, it’s assertive, but no, I don’t consider it violent. In fact, it’s self-protective. And in similar ways, you may be able to adapt orther martial arts techniques.

I am very ashamed of it. But I'm open and honest about having ASD and realised that too late and didn't have to social skills and defiantly not the skills to communicate in my relationships.

You can and will continue adding new skills.

Just like I will. In fact, I’ll even learn to better appreciate aspects of quote “normal” persons, even though for whatever strange reasons, they don’t seem willing to let themselves intensely get into life interests. Seems like they miss much of the color of life.

Maybe they think they make up for it in other regards. I’ll try to be open to that!

I live my life wearing hoodies, trackpants and regular t-shirts.

I don't wear jeans, shorts or button shirts.

I swim with my grey trackpants on instead of swimming shorts.

i like to rub silky material....counterpain, linning of coat...anything silky....rub rub rub rub. I think it might be a stim. But I do like comfy clothes as well.

That's a comfort and sensory preference thing. Stimming is a self-regulation thing.

And self-regulation sounds like a good thing, right?

And then we come to the topic of public vs. private stims, which I can easily accept.