I think my parents want to send me away someday

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Respite means a "break" or "time off" for a caregiver. It isn't only someone coming over so your parents can go out. It could mean taking you some place else so they can relax at home.

If someone in your life wants you to quit drinking, try to view that as information. You must be drinking too much or in the wrong way, for your parents to say that. Often we can't judge for ourselves when substance abuse is growing to be a problem.

I agree with what Dear_One said, that you need to do a few slightly scary things - a little bit at a time - in order to grow as a person. And if you don't even try, you are actually going backward.

Maybe you could start out by meeting the person who might be your respite worker (if they come to your home) or visiting the center where the care would be provided.