Reconciled with any bullies ?

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My main bully was my brother. We've reconciled to the point that we can get along at family events, and have some very interesting conversations, but I'm always a little guarded around him. He feels a little bad about it, but not enough; Once he said, 'do you have any idea how annoying you were?' as if that justified it.

Yeah, and I don't believe I will ever meet up with any of the bullies again. I like to think they are now fat, ugly and boring old farts whereas I am still young at heart.

Labpet,

That "conduit" just sounds like an IDIOT! I don't have nearly as many differences as you in that area, etc... but I have had SIMILAR treatment. I think they are just JEALOUS that WE can do our jobs, and THEY can't. And, with me and possibly you, they will say *I* dropped the ball if THEY did, just to shift blame.

As for me? TWO bullies stopped bullying me WITHOUT a fight. A couple other at least feigned friendship for a time. ONE, in Junior college, just magically seemed friendly! TODAY I have just people attacking through lawyers, etc... Of course THAT is just to try to see if they can get me to make them rich so it is easier to understand.

Same with me. Teachers seemed to hone in on me like a homing missile. I'll never forgive them... they were old enough to know better.

Nope. Never.

Not only do I not want an amicable reconcilation with any of the bullies in my life but if I ever have the chance I will break them.

Oh, don't get me wrong! There are some that, if they ever saw me, might even have been walking on the other side of the street. The ones I "reconciled" with were more a nuisance than anything else. The ones that were NASTY just dissappeared.

I am sorry to say that I “reconciled” with every one of them. I did so by beating the living hell out of them when I got strong enough to do so.

I guess that's what I should've done....

I've had two bullies who stand out in my life.

Bully 1: Joined the Marines during the war (I never saw him again). He is said to have married unhappily and committed suicide at the age of 35.

Bully 2: An intellectual bully (may have been an Aspie!) in high school. He was very good at showing how superior his intellect was to mine (and others'), possibly with reason, but I managed to fight back as well as I could (verbally). I decided that at our fifty year (!) high school reunion I'd apologise as I don't want to carry old grudges to my grave.

At the reunion we were pleasant enough to each other in a distant sort of way, but I recognised that he was just as obnoxious as he had ever been and I'd be damned if I'd apologise to that jerk!

So much for good intentiions.

I've had two bullies who stand out in my life.

Bully 1: Joined the Marines during the war (I never saw him again). He is said to have married unhappily and committed suicide at the age of 35.

Bully 2: An intellectual bully (may have been an Aspie!) in high school. He was very good at showing how superior his intellect was to mine (and others'), possibly with reason, but I managed to fight back as well as I could (verbally). I decided that at our fifty year (!) high school reunion I'd apologise as I don't want to carry old grudges to my grave.

At the reunion we were pleasant enough to each other in a distant sort of way, but I recognised that he was just as obnoxious as he had ever been and I'd be damned if I'd apologise to that jerk!

So much for good intentiions.

Luckily before I moved I lived in a big enough city where the chances of ever seeing anyone that I went to school with outside of school were slim to none. Never saw any of them again.

I can't say I ever have. On the rare chance that I meet any of the many who sought any opporunity to humiliate me, they act like nothing ever happened. The worst of the bunch "found" religion and became a totally different person.

The only thing that bugged me about the religious conversion was that of course, he had no recall of any of the things he did and said to me in the past. How convienient for him. I suppose he figures that if Jesus forgives him, good enough?

I wish people like that would stop hiding behind Jesus and take responsibility for their actions in the past and own up to it.

Strange thing. In junior high, I was mercilessly tortured with mental cruelty by the vast majority of my classmates- it was the 'gifted' program, with lax rules that encouraged a sort of "Lord of the Flies" atmosphere that usually landed hard on poor Piggy me. Among them, there was one girl who was the absolute worst. She never missed an opportunity to let me know how worthless I was, and she seemed, at the time, an ultra-confident sadist to whom nothing would stick and which nothing would topple.

So. Time passes, high school happens, and I suddenly have passing dealings with this girl. She is no longer the cruel peacock she once was. She seemed unsure of herself, a little bashful, and not at all hostile to me any more- as if she was at a disadvantage in general and knew it. And somehow, my bitterness and anger towards her melted away, because she was clearly not the same person.

I did, for a long time, hold resentments against the people who didn't 'get me' in my school years- the ones who weren't actively hostile but didn't know what the hell to do with me, my narrow obsession with film and my unwillingness to fit in. Part of me hated them for their uncomprehension, and another part of me hated myself for not knowing how to get with the program. But with my recent diagnosis (at the annoyingly advanced age of 34), that all fell away, too. It wasn't my fault, so I didn't need to return to that bitterness anymore, which I was using to scapegoat whenever something went on in my life. I'm remarkably peaceful, knowing what I know now.

For what it's worth.

I did have one bully come up to me when I was in college and sincerely apologize for the way he treated me, that he felt really bad for doing so. I now think he just took part in it because of peer pressure, and to avoid being bullied himself. I couldn't hold a grudge against him after that.

Really? In a way that makes him worse. He knew what he was doing was wromg but didn't have the guts to stand up for what he knew he should have, so he made someone else miserable. And then tried to say "sorry" as a way of salving his own guilt.
Nah, he's scum and should be made to felt as such so that he wakes up.