Be a "regular" person

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Dear_one
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20 Aug 2022, 3:53 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:

How is a regular person supposed to act?

The way a non-conformist refuses to.

CockneyRebel
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20 Aug 2022, 10:49 pm

I'll just be myself, thank you.

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Shadweller
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21 Aug 2022, 2:59 am

ASPartOfMe wrote:

From almost 9 years of reading stories from people here who have gotten an official diagnosis as an adult while an official diagnosis will increase your chances of your traits being accepted it is far far from a guarantee.

That's an interesting observation. I've still not told anyone I know "in real life" about the Autism diagnosis I received a few months ago. Due to the stigma I don't think it would help me at this stage. We might hope that it would increase understanding and / or acceptance from other people if they did know, but would that be the reality? I don't think so because it seems that Autism is so poorly understood in general by NTs and viewed so negatively.

But I can tell that the difference in self acceptance and self understanding is now a lot better for me. I am not ashamed of being Autistic in the slightest. The reason I don't tell other people is due to the stigma, not shame. Often other people take a person at their own estimation of themselves, so if a person can be accepting of and comfortable with their own difficulties (as much as possible) then indirectly this can affect how others relate to that person.

If that makes sense.

All this could apply to self diagnosis just as much, if the person is quite sure and everything seems to fit.

ASPartOfMe
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21 Aug 2022, 11:18 am

Shadweller wrote:

ASPartOfMe wrote:

It makes perfect sense.

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r00tb33r
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29 Aug 2022, 4:44 am

r00tb33r wrote:

Offices either did not return my calls or put me on waiting lists a year and a half ago, never to be heard from again. Not a single one to schedule an appointment at.

And once again I feel defeated to the point I no longer have the energy and motivation to seek professional help (for anxiety). They all failed me, again. When people like me call, it means it took a lot to make it.

I'm on my owl. I always was.

CockneyRebel
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29 Aug 2022, 1:22 pm

Regularity....yuck! I'll march to the beat of my own drum, thank you. +

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kraftiekortie
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29 Aug 2022, 1:24 pm

I bet some women would like Owl Men

They look cerebral.

r00tb33r
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30 Aug 2022, 3:37 am

kraftiekortie wrote:

I bet some women would like Owl Men

They look cerebral.

I was up until 9AM the other day.

skibum
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30 Aug 2022, 8:53 am

r00tb33r wrote:

My mom told me today to go into groups and be social. I reminded her that I'm not a regular person and it just doesn't work for me, groups make me feel like I don't belong, I feel like I'm in a glass box, or an outcast, and I can't casually socialize. "Then just be a regular person then," she said.

...

Mom: "You're self-diagnosing yourself with that nonsense."
Mom: "...Besides, they don't even diagnose people with that here."

Ugh.

On a typical day I don't identify as "different" or "special", but I do know my limits well.

So sorry you have to put with a mom like that.

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skibum
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30 Aug 2022, 8:54 am

r00tb33r wrote:

temp1234 wrote:

My sympathy to you. That's very difficult. That lack of understanding makes an autistic person's life unnecessarily difficult. Particularly coming from your own mother.

If you haven't already got a diagnosis, you should get one. It's really handy because it officially proves that you have certain difficulties. I rely on mine. Otherwise, my life would be harder.

Getting a level 1 ASD diagnosis as an adult in the states is very difficult. I sought it once years ago, it was next to impossible. Then I sought it again year and a half ago. Offices either didn't return my calls or put me on waiting lists to never be heard from again. There is not even a guarantee that it's possible, that's just to be seen by a specialist.

Years ago when I read literature on it, I re-experienced traumatic events in my life, accepting them and finding peace with the newfound understanding of why they happened the way they did. Later my mind just went blank on the past, and I could no longer assemble the intricate memories from my development for diagnostic purposes. I made a lot of progress during the past 6 years since I've been aware of my condition, I'm not even sure I can be diagnosed at this point. I'm just worried that if I sit across from a specialist now they'd just laugh in my face.

No, I don't mean that I'm worried that I'm fake. I just became comfortable with my past having understood it. It doesn't haunt me enough to recall it.

Do you have a job?

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Fnord
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30 Aug 2022, 9:03 am

r00tb33r wrote:

Whenever I read or hear something like that, I am reminded of this statement from one of the X-Men movies:

All sweetness, niceness, and good intentions, but completely cringe-worthy and totally stupid.

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