Let's be more silly?
It seems that icebreakers are about having fun.
I don't bond with people just because I have fun.
It may even make things worse.
They just throw us in a group and think that by having a little fun we will feel comfortable. But sorry guys. It doesn't work for many of us. Some of us are actually human.
Group activities can be difficult.
People often make group activities harder than they have to be.
But what is dry humour? Are puns dry?
I often tell homophonic puns.
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People often make group activities harder than they have to be.
If the group is working toward some common goal, though, sometimes that is not so bad.
I don't think it necessarily implies or excludes including an element of absurdity, but I believe it is possible to have both.
For instance, if I am purchasing a small item, for instance an automobile fuse, I might note to the cashier, with just a hint of concern, "I think this will fit through the front-door okay but if it only fits through if it's held on edge I might be back to to borrow a cart or a hand truck."
_________________
When diagnosed I bought champagne!
I finally knew why people were strange.
ASD for me is all about managing a very reactive stress response, and system in the reverse of when NTs would do so.
A bunch of NT folks are being silly by the edge of a proverbial cliff, but I am stressed and serious. They: "just relax", Me: "perhaps if we all move ten steps away from the cliff face, or I can step out (or do some less noticeable anxiety management exercises)."
A bunch of folks are being very serious in a ticket line, and I am stressed so I am silly. They: "just be serious", Me: "perhaps if I wasn't going to explode from boredom, or I can step out (or do some less noticeable anxiety management exercises)."
I am silly with a proverbial 1,000,000 point data set with full analysis due in two, but a bunch of NT folks are stressed and serious...
I am serious facing two irrational power-hungry workplace factions, but a bunch of NT folks are stressed and silly...
When my (ASD) mom burst out laughing in the middle of my aunt's funeral b/c the church folk were washing the dishes (Catholic post-sacrament stuff), and my (ASD) niece joined in giggling ---- I could totally see where they were coming from --- but with my NT grieving cousins... well, I held my silly inside and kindly asked my mom to conform, although it broke my heart a little... Why NT folks don't lighten up a little...
I am a very playful person (dolphin is my personality spirit animal), but when I am stressed my bottlenose is on task. It's hard to take that deep breath, realize the danger is not as dangerous as perceived and ... but for some of us it kind of is. I am the clumsy one who knocks the item over, takes that extra step and trips, forgets the things on the hood of the car, leaves the expensive item on the cab seat, takes my wallet and leaves my bags of groceries in store... so I have to be serious and pay attention to cliffs or I might just walk off one. That includes socially. I'm probably hyperthymic, so again, I do silly, but again ASD tends to be "too" much of most everything and I don't want to be "too" silly such that it can't be repaired. My NT son pushes my ASD daughter; she pushes him back MORE. My NT son teases my ASD daughter; she teases him back MORE. I see it when she plays tag, soccer and other sports, she responds with MORE. At school she's MORE quiet, MORE rule-oriented. Like me she's MORE of everything. More serious than others. More silly than others.
So, could we do NT: Take turns talking for 2-20 seconds each, doing silly and serious at levels 2-3, being personal at levels 2-4 ... ummm, yes? It would be soul crushing and boring. With our BFFs we talk not at all, or for minutes at a time, we do silly and serious at levels 1-8, we are personal at levels 2-7. That is life-affirming for us.
People often make group activities harder than they have to be.
If the group is working toward some common goal, though, sometimes that is not so bad.
I don't think it necessarily implies or excludes including an element of absurdity, but I believe it is possible to have both.
For instance, if I am purchasing a small item, for instance an automobile fuse, I might note to the cashier, with just a hint of concern, "I think this will fit through the front-door okay but if it only fits through if it's held on edge I might be back to to borrow a cart or a hand truck."
So if we are supposed to be very bad at body language and facial expressions are we supposed to be good at deadpan?
Are we really that bad at facial expressions?
I have heard that we can actually be better at it in comfortable situations.
This is why I think that some of us can be really good at acting.
Does acting silly help me be more comfortable? Not really.
I think doing silly exercices should be step 2.
Step 1 should be talking to eachother in a normal way.
But they say that comedy is important, right?
So if people walk into a room doing something slapstick that would make people more comfortable? Probably not. That would be the class clown.
Comedy doesn't always make me feel comfortable. If it is too silly without characters showing real emotions then I find it difficult to stand. People like Chaplin because he showed emotions even if he was a comical actor.
I do think silly exercices can be an ostacle.
What I need myself is being myself.
How should silly group exercices help?
Has it helped you?