MatchboxVagabond wrote:
hrod1234 wrote:
Social skills training is just codeword for autism conversion therapy. We shouldn't have to change for the sake of neurotypicals, just as gays shouldn't have to change for the sake of heterosexuals.
Not really, some of us are extremely high masking to the point where we do seem to fit in. We're still autistic, we just are fortunate to have the option of avoiding some of the pitfalls for a while. Even if we do occasionally commit a faux pax or get stumped by some sarcasm. The fact that we can do it, does not mean that we're not drained by a day of laughing at jokes we don't get and pretending that we understood things that we didn't understand because it seemed easier and less awkward that getting the person to explain what they meant for some trivial interaction. Or the getting hit by a random mine when we do miss the point entirely and then get to laugh at ourselves to avoid it being really uncomfortable for everybody else in the room.
I'm not really the biggest fan of masking as it is a massive expenditure of energy and resources that I'd prefer to put to other uses, but it's pretty much undeniable that some degree of masking does make it easier to live amongst the NT and to need less help just to exist.
I'm very low masking. Why so some Autistics feel they must heavily highly mask? I can understand if they're in a line of work where even the most subtle oddity can get them fired. Or if they're running for a political office: yes, got to extremely mask. But those circumstances are not the case for the vast majority.
Heck, I go through life pretty much myself. My biggest masking trait is the suppression of stimming around people (I only do socially acceptable stims). I don't care if someone is perplexed that I didn't laugh at their joke. I look forward to the day that some jerk calls me out on this. I already have my response rehearsed:
"I'm sure there are one or two things in life that you're good at, but ... being funny isn't one of them."I can sense when people think I'm odd or wonder about me. So what. Let them. That's THEIR problem.
Even at my niece's wedding, I has on only a VERY LIGHT mask, very light. But my brother was still able to see my social awkwardness. So what.
As adults, why do so many autistics fear for their well-being if they don't pass?
I'm an Alpha. Maybe that's why passing doesn't matter to me? Maybe that's why I'm not afraid to put someone in their place if they call me out on being odd?
09 Apr 2023, 5:42 pm
