We Speak Aspie

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Personally, I think I speak "random" or "disordered."

It's not the speaking, it's the understanding.
"We understand Aspie" would surely get my business.

Autspeak, Aspeak Topic

Language is communication, which involves verbal, written, non verbal gestures and facial expressions. It is a complicated process concerning two or more people understanding what each is saying. Errors can result, of course, which could lead to unexpected results, which can run the gamut of simple misunderstanding on the one hand and on the other hand, out and out war.

NTs may think they read between the lines but the historical evidence of wars, strained diplomacy, dysfunctional feuds, disrupted social relations and the like point to the conclusion that they have problems interpreting communication even more than we do. Their advantage is that they maintain power by tending to congregate as majorities and utilize group think strategies that enable them to function and prevail, thus eliminating dissent and strengthening social cohesion. And because this has worked for them they have no need to change. Nothing succeeds like success.

People living on the Autism Spectrum do not go along with social and language rules as well as NTs. They analyze and question more. If anything we do read between the NT lines. We see through their nonsense. We beg to differ. And historically we have paid the price by being ignored, ostracized, banished, murdered, dismissed, excommunicated, cast out and in general discarded by NTs.

NTs need to learn how to listen to and understand what Aspies are saying.

An excellent topic and great posts by all.

No it doesn't but it is frustrating and one of the worst things about Aspieness not to understand things that everyone else seems to. It makes me wonder just how much of the world I miss out on because I simply don't get it.

this made me laugh because i so understand, it is so hard to understand why people do not just say what they mean and when i do they look for what i really mean when what i said is what i really mean , especially my psychologist, she is always saying to me " i think that you are trying to say" no i am saying exactly what i am trying to say lol, there is one thing i do have problems with though and that is i will hold a converstation in my head and then just come out with the conclusion and expect people to know what the context is but i am really trying to not do that any more but i sometimes forget lol, why should we have to learn to speak nt why can they not just say what they mean and accept that i do lol

Ugh! Me too. Or they try and guess what my response is because I didn't instantly respond as soon as they finished speaking.

Damn it! I'm an Aspie. I need a couple extra seconds to figure out what you are saying and then figure out how to communicate my response to you!! !

Exactly. Now that is not any surprise since our language has many words with one or more meanings and sometimes my head fills with images and I have to find the right one.

Yes, the ambiguity can be troublesome. Though, sometimes I know exactly what I want to say but can't think of the only damn word that communicates it well, and then I try to explain it using other words and it comes out as a giant disaster.

Just a few days ago, in front of a group of people, someone said he thought I was the type of person that is into heavy metal. I said "I'm not really into any music", and then 5 people turned and looked at me in shock, and then I had to explain that I like listening to music while I'm driving and I like going to concerts and such, but that I'm not "into" music like other people are. I still don't know how to explain it well, but I've had girls reject me because I didn't know who some singer or band was. Just recently, a date made me feel really uncomfortable because of the way she responded when she found out that I have a Marylin Manson CD and I also have the movie "The Phantom of the Opera". She made me feel like I am a freak because I enjoy listening to both. I would say that those people are "into" music. I'm just a casual listener!

Okay, I relooked through some of the links on my website and came up with an answer to this.

According to Carol Gray and Tony Attwood in the "Discovery of 'Aspie' Criteria":

Both my son's have invented some of their own terms... when they didn't know the accepted one or when theirs made more sense to them...

My oldest son started talking (mama dada phase) at 10 months. On his third birthday, my mother-in-law was watching him line his matchbox cars up carefully, so they were exactly even. When she commented on it he never looked up but said "Oh yes, I'm very meticulous...." her jaw almost hit her lap. Still he couldn't get "today, tomorrow, yesterday" in his head. He always insisted on saying "this day, next day, last day". Even now at 16, if he's distracted or stressed he'll use those, which tells me that's how he THINKS, he just translates those into the "accepted" terms for others.

My younger son had more practical ones, "soup water" for broth, "trout pants" for waders and when he was supremely pissed the ever popular "bugguss" as in "you... you... you is a BUGGUSS!! !" I still have no idea what that one meant...

To say things were broken I always said they were "Bo-bore." It made and still does make sense to me.

Speaking of the meticulous comment, I tossed out the word "claustrophobic" once when I was 6, and in the right context too!

That's a good description.

My husband says he has trouble finding the right words because he thinks in pictures and always has to keep translating into language.

I hear words as very literal. When someone says "Keep you eyes pealed" or "keep an eye on that," those phrases bring to mind some gruesome images.

When someone says "You're kidding" it makes me nervous because when I'm not kidding I don't want to be accused of it. Then I move through some fast passages in my head about the correct translation of "You're kidding" and get past the momentary distraction.

If you want a communication gap, try going for a job interview ! !!

I went to one yesterday, and I think I lost out when they asked how I'd feel about having a strict work schedule. I replied that I'd love it, and that I prefer a strict schedule. They looked at each other like the NT "poker game" look, and I think that's one I didn't get ! !!

I am like that too and it takes longer to answer people sometimes.