"We have to hurt you in order to help you."

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k96822
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05 Feb 2008, 2:32 pm

richardbenson wrote:

abusive people, holier than thou people and hipocrites usually have the attitude of "We have to hurt you in order to help you."
three words should be used often here: just ignore them

Great point. Abusive people want an excuse, holier than thou people feel entitled, and hipocrites just plain don't understand they're doing it.

TLPG
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05 Feb 2008, 3:40 pm

zendell wrote:

Some people, like the person I mentioned, felt bad that people were mistreating me and noticed I didn't stand up for myself. He stood up for me and then punched me after that when he saw me and told me he wouldn't stop until I punched him back. I eventually punched him back and after that we boxed for fun. He became my best friend until I had to move a year later.

I'm disgusted by this. Sorry, but that's still bullying in my book - and in fact if I was treated like that and told "I'll keep punching until you punch back" I would have gone to the police and pressed assault charges.

Punching is for cowards - full stop. (Except if you are a boxer and you get paid for it - and even then personally I hate it)

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05 Feb 2008, 5:18 pm

TLPG wrote:

zendell wrote:

Bully definition - "A person who is habitually cruel or overbearing, especially to smaller or weaker people." http://education.yahoo.com/reference/di ... ntry/bully

Helping a person stand up for themselves is clearly NOT bullying. Its the intention that matters. There's nothing cruel about punching someone to help give them some self-respect.

Think what you want TLPG. I won't argue with you. Its your loss.

k96822
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05 Feb 2008, 5:57 pm

zendell wrote:

If a person is being habitually cruel or overbearing, aren't they a bully regardless of their intention?

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05 Feb 2008, 6:48 pm

That idea along with "cruel to be kind" are stupid. When stiff like that happen I wonder

you "really" is disturbed.

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zendell
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05 Feb 2008, 6:58 pm

k96822 wrote:

zendell wrote:

If a person is being habitually cruel or overbearing, aren't they a bully regardless of their intention?

Cruel definition from http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/cruel
2. enjoying the pain or distress of others: the cruel spectators of the gladiatorial contests.

Their not inflicting pain for their own enjoyment. Their doing it to help.

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05 Feb 2008, 7:40 pm

zendell wrote:

Sound's like an excuse a child abuser would use when caught beating his kid as a punishment.

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k96822
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05 Feb 2008, 8:25 pm

zendell wrote:

k96822 wrote:

zendell wrote:

If a person is being habitually cruel or overbearing, aren't they a bully regardless of their intention?

Zendell, surely the first definition fits this particular situation:
1. willfully or knowingly causing pain or distress to others.

sojournertruth
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06 Feb 2008, 2:03 am

Zwerfbeertje wrote:

sojournertruth wrote:

I work in a hospital, and a lot of what modern medicine does is painful but helpful ...

Are you religious, do you believe in an afterlife? If so, you would be better off dead, no?

It makes me sick to think about what happens in that hellhole and anyone supporting it is the lowest kind of life-form imaginable.

No, I'm not religious, and I don't believe in an afterlife. I think that this life is all that we have, and if it takes a chest tube to save someone's lungs from colapsing, to preserve a little more of their ephemeral, precious life, then so be it. People can refuse treatment - if someone is competent (ie, adult, not a danger to selves or others), then hospital staff can be charged with asault and battery for treating them against their wishes.

The hospital I work in is, in fact, not a hellhole - it is among the top 90% in the nation in terms of patient satisfaction.

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06 Feb 2008, 4:20 am

zendell wrote:

I think most of the anti-NT posts here are the result of aspies misunderstanding others.

Im glad that you had someone who wanted to help you, but the majority of the bullies that people encounter are not like that, they want to take their problems out on someone else.

I think that boy you are talking of is the exception, not the rule.

And as for aspies misunderstanding NTs, we think differently to them, of course we are going to misunderstand them. You cant expect us to magically be able to relate to them, or to have respect for their groupthink when we are so individualistic. I dont think it is misunderstanding at all, I think it is a clash of cultures.

I think more understanding between the 2 mindsets will help though. I mean, wouldnt it be nice if they respected our need for independent thinking and behaviour, and we respected their desire to fit in and be like whoever they admire?

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Zwerfbeertje
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06 Feb 2008, 7:10 am

sojournertruth wrote:

... if it takes a chest tube to save someone's lungs from colapsing ....

And what exactly has a collapsed lung in common with autism and skin-shocks? Do you believe pain, terror and the fear of punishment are appropriate treatment for autism? If so, say straight up that you favor torture as a treatment, but don't hide behind a statement about collapsed lungs.

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06 Feb 2008, 8:29 pm

One thing that I'd like to add, is that just because we don't understand NTs, does not mean that we need to be cured.

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k96822
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06 Feb 2008, 8:50 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:

One thing that I'd like to add, is that just because we don't understand NTs, does not mean that we need to be cured.

Exactly. For the same reason we're not thrown into institutions -- we can do any job, anywhere, and excel in anything, so long as NT's don't actively stand in our way because of irrational feelings.

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06 Feb 2008, 11:40 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:

One thing that I'd like to add, is that just because we don't understand NTs, does not mean that we need to be cured.

Actually, I do understand NTs. Just realize that perversity is part of their makeup.

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07 Feb 2008, 1:05 pm

does restaining count..it has never acsually hurt but i have been sometimes upset coz of it

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sojournertruth
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07 Feb 2008, 3:05 pm

Zwerfbeertje wrote:

sojournertruth wrote:

... if it takes a chest tube to save someone's lungs from colapsing ....

At what point was it officially declared that this thread was only about skin shocks and terrorism?

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