I was born in the late 40's and went to a catholic grammar school in the 50's. The nuns considered me a quiet shy little girl. I was mostly spaced out in my own world.
My parents thought I was babyish and slow. I finished grammar school with bad grades.
I went to a public high school in the 60's. I was getting D's and F's in my classes and didn't have friends or talk to other kids.
They found out I had a high IQ and got 99th percentile on an abstract reasoning test. A phsych came to the school to evaluate me but he didn't get the answers he wanted and gave up.
My mother said I was sick in the head but told my father she didn't want to take me to a phsych because she was afraid they would think she was a bad mother.
My father thought I should go to a finishing school for girls because I didn't know how to act.
My adult life was messed up. I was socially naïve and people said I wasn't playing with a full deck and some people used me.
I was a welfare mother living in poverty.
In the 80's I learned some programming languages and became a mainframe programmer. I worked the graveyard shift by myself for over 2 decades. The janitor told me that people in another department thought I was weird.
I'm just now learning why people thought I was weird and it wasn't anything bad. I just didn't know how to act and be social and get along with people.
It didn't occur to me to fake being normal because I didn't pay attention to those things or know the importance of being social. It was always my default to be in my own world.
02 Feb 2017, 8:42 pm
