Some people (NT's) are just thick!! !!

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Mikomi
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18 Feb 2008, 1:39 pm

Well I am autistic and I can share with you a story that reminds me of your son and how others just don't get it.

My aunt was visiting from Texas for the first time in 12 years (I'd been there in that time, but anyway...) and my mother had this thing planned for her family and ours (my aunt, uncle, two cousins, my parents, my sister, me, hubby and our two kids) to go to dinner at a restaurant 45 minutes from where I live at 6:30PM. No problemo. Until she changed the location and the time at the last minute. I can't deal with that and so I ended up not being able to go and instead spent the rest of the evening at home in tears. I REALLY wanted to see my aunt, but I couldn't go. The restaurant she switched to was farther away, I didn't know exactly how to get there and there was no way I could have made it in time. They said it was fine if I was a little late, but none of this was in the original plan. It still haunts me, and this happened last year. I do not handle changes in plan or routine well without advance (read: at least 24 hours) warning. It's like it just ruins everything.

So your son's internal struggle is one I know well, poor little guy.


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Mum2ASDboy
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18 Feb 2008, 3:01 pm

TLPG wrote:
Mum2ASD, next time that happens - switch the TV off and pull out the plug before giving him a verbal serve about your son.

In order to fit in with your son, you yourselves need to establish some sort of routine. Now it's not always going to work out (nothing ever does) but if you can just get things going properly and include some talk time for him to air his grievances - and remember to listen of course (I'm probably preaching to the converted there!).

If Dad won't do it - kick him out. Yes I know that sounds cruel, but if he truly loves the kid as you do, he'd do it.


Just have to clarify that Dad is MINE, Damo's Poppa. Damo's own father thinks there is nothing wrong with him



TLPG
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18 Feb 2008, 3:38 pm

Oh! That makes things harder! But my post still stands though. And does your husband respect the routine need?



Mum2ASDboy
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18 Feb 2008, 3:45 pm

TLPG wrote:
Oh! That makes things harder! But my post still stands though. And does your husband respect the routine need?

I am a single parent, NO husband, NO partner so it is actually slightly easier for me. Me and Damo live with MY Dad. Normally Poppa (Granddad) is not too bad unless he is tired or worried.

Damo sees his father once a week (if he is lucky) so I only have to put up with him for 3 hours at the most. He left when Damo was a baby because he couldn't handle Damo's crying like WTF babies cry, get over it!



TLPG
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19 Feb 2008, 7:12 am

Mum2ASDboy wrote:
TLPG wrote:
Oh! That makes things harder! But my post still stands though. And does your husband respect the routine need?

I am a single parent, NO husband, NO partner so it is actually slightly easier for me. Me and Damo live with MY Dad. Normally Poppa (Granddad) is not too bad unless he is tired or worried.

Damo sees his father once a week (if he is lucky) so I only have to put up with him for 3 hours at the most. He left when Damo was a baby because he couldn't handle Damo's crying like WTF babies cry, get over it!


Thanks for the info! And I agree with that last sentence - although speaking for myself I don't like those three words (the very last three).