Would like to know your opinion

Post Reply New Topic

hehe thanks, I'm actually a woman haha, but eh, even in person I have "masculine" energy/vibes so I'm used to people thinking I'm a guy (online) haha

huh, this information sound very restrictive, is this an accurate discription of Asperger's? These definitons do not seem to apply to me but when I read personal discriptions it's like the person is me, maybe I just dont understand it properly:

Symptoms
Signs and symptoms of Asperger's syndrome include:

Engaging in one-sided, long-winded conversations, without noticing if the listener is listening or trying to change the subject
Displaying unusual nonverbal communication, such as lack of eye contact, few facial expressions, or awkward body postures and gestures
Showing an intense obsession with one or two specific, narrow subjects, such as baseball statistics, train schedules, weather or snakes
Appearing not to understand, empathize with, or be sensitive to others' feelings
Having a hard time "reading" other people or understanding humor
Speaking in a voice that is monotonous, rigid or unusually fast
Moving clumsily, with poor coordination
Having an odd posture or a rigid gait

Nah. That desription applies to some, but not all. I could say, simply by looking at their president, that all Americans are backwards, xenophobic, mentally-retarded hayseed puppets.

Of course, that doesn't really apply to all Americans at all, though.
So, yes - that description of AS is limited.

First things first, many people with AS are incorrectly diagnosed with ADD/ADHD, although sometimes you have both, like myself. Autism is basically a struggle to be understood. You say one thing and people hear another. You may try to tell people how you feel and they just don't understand, or seem not to care, which is frustrating, and for me usually leads to an arguement when I try to explain what I'm trying to explain but can't. As far as "talking to yourself" I do that a lot myself. If I'm reading a book, I sort of "hear" the words as I read them. I also understand what you mean when you say that people who talk faster win every arguement. That happens to me because while I'm struggling to find a way to tell a person something they usually start talking and then the opportunity is lost, so I end up just listening until they're done. Mostly this is because I have to think before I talk and so I can't keep up. You described a situation where you quit a job because everything really weighed on you. This also happens to me a lot. Social overstimulation I call it. For me interacting or even being around people is a chore. This is also linked to ADD. ADD is basically the innability to tune anything out or to stop thinking about it unti all possible tangets of that thought are resolved. And this of course is impossible, so your brain eventually gets tired and gets stuck in a "loop", like you described. I have frequently described myself as sort of detatched from the rest of the world. Observing the social cluster from an outside perspective. Aware of it but not really understanding or wanting to be a part of it. Shying away from people in groups is also something I do. I don't like to be seen by or interact with groups of people because it's the chore of interaction multiplied by the number of people present and it's just too hard.
I think I understand what you're trying to get across very well, and if you do have AS or HFA, that's probably something that you've never heard before, or didn't believe if you heard it. I would IMMEDIATELY go and get a diagnosis. Based on what I've seen, there's a 99.999999999999999999999999999999999999% chance that you're somewhere in the autism spectrum.
For the time being however, if you're having problems, if you can't communicate with someone or you're just overstimulated, the best thing to do is just relax. Just stop what you're doing, stop talking, stop thinking and just remove yourself from the situation. Give yourself some time to figure out what's going on and then when you're ready, jump back into the fray.

Well just my 2 cents, I'm not a psychologist but the major defining trait of autism is an inability to deal with the social side of life. Seems that you have a lot of friends and you describe yourself as a social person, so automatically I would probably discount ASDs.

I don't really agree with that. Having ASD doesn't mean you can't have friends, and having friends doesn't mean you don't have ASD. A person can have friends but still have trouble interacting with them. And like in my case, I am extremely intelligent, which allows me to compensate really well for my Asperger's. Most people don't know that I have it until I tell them. It doesn't affect the people around me. It only affects me. And as long as I can work around it it doesn't show. But sometimes that's not the case.

I visited a psychiatrist yesterday and told her that I suspect myself to be Aspie. She has never heard about the AS before
But still I'm sure that I am.

Here's an interesting tidbit for you. Before I found wp, I had always typed and written with perfect capitolization, grammar and punctuation. And I'd never met anyone before who did that in an imformal situation. But I've noticed something. Anywhere on this site you can see it. ASD people type like I do, and NT people type differently. they type like this without puncuasion and bad spellin and stuf. So... yeah. Just somethin' to think about.

I halfway disagree with the last sentence.

When you know something applies to you it's an epiphany, that makes sense.

But just because something applies to you, even applies greatly, it doesn't mean you know it. So stating that, as a reason to doubt being autistic, makes no sense, because it's totally possible to be autistic and not know (even after being told) that it applies to you.

So I don't understand why asking about being autistic (which is, after all, similar to what seeking a diagnosis is doing) somehow implies that it doesn't really apply to you. It seems more like gathering information.

Autism was not initially (say, the first 6 or 7 years after diagnosis) an epiphany to me, because:

1. I had no idea how I appeared from the outside, and that people were interpreting my behavior in the same way the DSM interprets autistic people's behavior.

2. Many descriptions of what went on inside autistic people's heads didn't fit me, unless the description was written by an autistic person. This is because non-autistic people, even scientists, don't understand how we think very well, and make a lot of errors in describing it.

3. I was unaware of certain facets of my early development. Or rather, I was aware of them, but because of other evidence that seemingly (but not really) contradicted it, I believed my awareness to be in error.

4. I had almost no self-confidence.

After realizing I might really be autistic, I assumed that I was either very mildly autistic or very atypical for an autistic person. Because, still, the descriptions did not seem to apply to me, and I erroneously assumed that they did apply to 'regular' autistic people for the most part. (Research is showing they don't.)

Keep in mind, at the point that this was going on, I was pretty visibly different. People treated me like a young child most of the time. By adulthood I spent large parts of the day unable to speak. People stared at me (I was told -- I don't notice stares very well). Some people actually referred to me as low-functioning. I once went to a proctologist and he immediately looked at me and asked a one-word question to my parents -- "Autistic?" People called me ret*d a lot. And when I went to Autreat at age 19 some people referred to me afterwards as low-functioning, and at least one person expressed real irritation that I had been allowed to travel alone.

And yet I still doubted this for many years. Because I didn't know how I looked to others, and I still thought for a long time that the experts must know what they're talking about. I was far more insecure about it than this person in this post seems to be, and yet I'm clearly autistic now that I know what autism is and what I look like and stuff. So for me the epiphany came far after the official diagnosis, and far after being involved with the autistic community. I had to wait until I both understood stuff more and trusted my own judgment more.

I know quite a few people but its becuz I have 2 extremely social younger brothers who kinda drag me into, everyone knows me as thier sister & that is how I meet people or through my friends. I really like to make friends. I usually know all about a person before I even say hello. But talking to people on my own is terrifying & when I go out with friends I'm obnoxiously glued to the back of whoever I feel most confidant with. I have to work really hard to even go becuz I feel really uncomfortable, so unless I have at least 2 people I am really close to with me all the time, I tend to drink waaaay to much and stand in a corner staring at people.

I used to not be able to laugh audibly & had to practice to make a sound, & even now people say my laugh is "creepy" "wierd" or too loud

I also couldnt talk like, at all, my lips moved & in my head I heard the words [perfectly but was making no sound, it took me a while to really differentiate my internal voice from my external, but now I can talk to people, like superficial polite conversation, beyond that is where I get messed up. I usually say the wrng thing or ask something wrong.

hehehe
It's true! I do that too! I had to learn to write more "informally" becuz it was bugging my friends. But also becuz I consider myself a writer but tend to write "dumbed down" becuz I want as many people to understand me as possible.

And also how polite everyone is, not bashing, etc.

[quote="anbuend]
2. Many descriptions of what went on inside autistic people's heads didn't fit me, unless the description was written by an autistic person. This is because non-autistic people, even scientists, don't understand how we think very well, and make a lot of errors in describing it.

4. I had almost no self-confidence.
[/quote]

These are big problems for me.

I'm so happy I'm not nuts, seriously. I saw mozart & the whale, but it just did not seem to apply to me, altho the girl was very like me, becuz I think, I am extremely intelligent, altho I dont go out of my way to show off, & I dont obsess in the same way they did, nor did I have problems with my movements or speaking, I THINK I look normal, when I make an effort I'm pretty sure I pass, it's when I stop trying that I realize how different I am & feel isolated. I have friends etc, but I realize I have to WORK a lot harder than they do, somehow.

No one here will ever say anything to degrade you because of any disability. We know all to well how it feels to be misunderstood and mistreated by people who don't even understand what they're doing. That's why we're here. In real life, around NT people, we can't be ourselves, because people don't understand us. So we create facades for ourselves. But here, we don't hafta do that. We can let it all hang out. I am who I am, and I like it that way. Also, the problem have an internal voice and an external voice is, I believe, common among those with HFA. Not so much with AS though. I'd say that you're somewhere inbetween the two. Just keep in mind that people with ASD are not clones of each other. Everyone is different. Everyone has a different set of challenges, and strengths. Don't ever forget your strengths. You're clearly intelligent, and you understand yourself better than most NT's ever will. And that's important.

Thanks very much, like serious, a lot.

No problemo. Also, I see from your avatar that you chew your fingernails. Fingernails are tasty! I don't even own a pair of fingernail clippers. I used to chew my toenails too when I was younger, but I can't do that anymore.