coming out

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My reactions have been mostly negative, with people quickly saying "No, you don't have that! You're just... different... that's all." Most of my family is in the camp that all psychological disorders are just made-up by psychologists in a big scheme to sell medications to treat them and make $ off of simple "differences" among the mindsets of people. Doesn't matter that AS is untreatable with medication... still doesn't exist, just a conspiracy.

Then I had 1 friend whose mother is an actual psychiatrist who likes to jokingly call me names like "Poopyhead" or "Stinky". I told her about my AS, and she told her mom, and then my friend got back to me and saying "You can't have Aspergers because when I call you a Poopyhead, you know I'm kidding. Someone with Aspergers couldn't know that." Somehow the concept of learning when people are joking (after you know that individual pretty well) and that AS is a spectrum disorder is totally lost to them. I seem to remember being quite upset the first time she called me a name, thinking I'd upset her somehow. She doesn't remember that, and still insists I can't have AS on that alone.

I've so far only had 1 friend that said "That explains you pretty well." She said she was quite shocked at how accurately I fit into the definition of it.

(Those are both online friends; my few real-life friends seem to be too scared of hurting my feelings by agreeing with me having AS somehow. Maybe I'm just not explaining it right?)

The only people I've come out to are some online friends... Two of whom have Asperger's and one who is diagnosed but not positive he has it (he was told he had "a mild case"). I haven't been in a position to be judged by anyone yet.

I have no idea who I want to tell, though. Most of my social life is online and there I will probably be open about it... Not sure about telling family though. That's a bit scary. (And I live with my parents.)

ok, sorry, i kinda had a mini meltdown there lol

what im trying to say is that in my opinion, we should tell whomever we wanna tell, but we really should not care much, or at all, about what they think about it. if theyre supportive and cool, thats awesome, but when they react negatively or in a disbelieving manner, i think we should ignore those types of reactions. of course, they got the right to disbelieve if they wanna, but it shouldnt affect us. but as you can see it affects me. what i dont think i will ever understand is disbelief; the concept that you tell someone something and they deny you your belief. its demeaning and thoughtless and rude.

that's all i'll say on this, thanks.

mike

It has been a mixed bag.
(and I don't have a diagnosis...and don't say I do..but might mention that I relate to the spectrum and whatnot)...but it is comforting to bring it up once in a while....and sometimes I might when I am not supposed to....

reactions have ranged from

being laughed in my face...
to skepticism that graduated to grudging acceptance...
to....that explains alot of stuff about you..and I have friends who are aspies...
to....I think that sorta sounds alot like me..(from a good friend who well could be... at least a little bit..)

I'm really close to the friend I've told, and I told her, and not my other friend of... ooh... coming up to 4 years, and she is only a 1-year-friend. xD
Anyway, she took it really well, her mum was a nurse, so I assume she knew what it was, she doesn't mention it, and it's as if I didn't say anything, and she doesn't tell our other friends, which is great.

It's good having a friend you can tell secrets to.

I don't have my diagnosis that long, but only my closest family knows and my best friend. My mother told her colleagues at work, and my teachers know about it. I'm not plaaning to tell my classmates, because I know for sure that they won't see me anymore, but my AS, it will overrule everything. After all, it is just a bunch of bullies, liars and gossipers. it is just a fact. If they'd know, I guess they'll be very negative, too. Asking denigrating questions. I just don't want them to know, and I'm probably not going to tell my other friends.

It's rather annoying that my mother thinks she knows me better than I know myself. She really doesn't know that much, however, she seems to believe she knows where all my conduct comes from. When I tell her something else, and that she's wrong, she doesn't believe me and, probably because I have AS, and she doesn't even really know what that is, she works with autistic children with an IQ up to 85, but she knows almost nothing about AS however she believes she does.

Very varied. Friends have been supportive. Family has been supportive. Business colleagues have treated me better than before. A few people have been very nasty about it, but it seems to me that some people can manage to be nasty about just about anything, so maybe that's not a big surprise. Have I regretted telling people? No.