If Aspergers is a gift, why do lots of people here moan

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I went through my childhood and adolescent years with out benefit of being called 'gifted' with anything. I went through my young adult hood, my middle age and now, (since people don't live to 130 usually) past my middle age still with out anyone suggesting I was 'gifted'.

so I guess I missed all the grumbling about being considered 'gifted.' I did get a lot of 'crazy' and 'ret*d' and 'dufus' though.

Merle

It's a gift AND a curse.

The difficult part is being socially awkward, and face-blind. This is what most AS moan about. We yearn for companionship (love) yet we're hobbled in our attempts to achieve it.

I for one, have always been told I'm gifted at writing and expressing myself. But that's it. Being able to recite Ferrari engines and makes doesn't impress many people.

Why must it be entirely a positive or negative? SOME have benefits, SOME have detrimental effects!

I don't understand dentarthurdent's comments - nobody has the right to belittle us and insult us for our differences! I do expect nt's to acknowledge AS, and if some don't like me for my AS behaviour - so what? I don't like limited-dedicated socializers, so were even!
I acknowledge them as they ought to acknowledge me.

I wouldn't call it a curse, nor a blessing, its just a different way of being. Unfortunately the majority of "NT"'s are quick to judge if anyone is different from them.. and kids are awful when it comes to being "different" and because of that we may feel its a "curse" but I personally don't think it is (because there are plenty of worse things that could go on with you other than being under the spectrum)... The way I see it is that the world would be a boring place if everyone was the same

I would think that to Luca Cordero di Montezemolo you would be exquisitely gifted, my dear Prof.

Merle

Because it's a curse and a gift at the same time.

You are too kind, Merle ...
I doubt that Mssr. Montezemolo would be impressed, but we would have a lovely chat over a bottle of Chianti, I'm quite sure ...

U R NOT Sofa King We Todd Ed topic

UA, NO ONE here is redardated (strange, yet creative adjective). If anyone dared to call me that, there would be a duel.

We CAN figure out how to use the gift. I have faith in me, even after almost 54 years of life.

I don't moan, I groan.

Asperger's isn't a gift. I wouldn't trade it for anything now, but Jesus Christ, it's no blessing.

There are both good and bad factors. It's common for depression to exist co-morbidly with AS so that may seem like "moaning".

im mild retardet i think

It's hard sometimes to see the positive for the negative. If it's only positive in your life as pertaining to gifts and benefits or whatever, then I'm happy it worked out for you. The challenges however are real and the rest of us aren't just bitching and moaning.

Rather than gift or a curse, consider it an aspect.

I do not expect everyone in the world learn sign-language, but I also expect those who do not, refrain from unlawful conduct, such as physically assaulting people, whether or not those people can only communicate in sign-language.
The fact is, it is never excusable to bully others employing violence, intimidation, threats, harassment, or other unlawful means. It's also not nice to pick on people, and picked on people are both likely to be upset about it, and make statements reflecting the 'not-niceness' of antics they have been victimised by.
In terms of unlawful acts, they're unlawful; enough said. In terms of not-nice acts (that are lawful), people are probably likely to respond with their own not-niceness (such as moaning about it). This is all very normal human behavior; if you wish to fit in with NTs, there's no reason to give up whining when you feel negative about something or someone since this is a behavior in common, like breathing and eating.

They can be blamed as anyone else can for their own conduct. Do we excuse child-abuse if the child was misbehaviing? Do we excuse burglary if the property owner failed to secure their property? Whether or not people with ASDs act in a way that annoys others, people are responsible for how they respond. Moaning about something is a common and culturally accepted response to 'adversity'. Assaulting or harassing someone is not.
If someone responds to annoyance in an unacceptable manner, moaning about it is entirely normal, human and more NTish than not. If someone responds in an acceptable but upsetting way to annoyance, moaning about it is entirely normal, human and more NTish than not.

If you wish to fit in with NTs, there is no need to give up whining when you feel negative about something or someone, since this is a behavior in common like breathing and eating.

And typical NT behavior also. Thinking it is all the fault of someone or something else, and moaning about that is entirely normal human behavior.

If you wish to fit in with NTs, there is no need to give up whining when you feel negative about something or someone, since this is a behavior in common like breathing and eating.

Whatever people could do or avoid doing to avoid negative responses from others, some responses are unacceptable, and further there is nothing particular to people with ASDs when it comes to whining, winging and/or moaning about adversity.

If you wish to fit in with NTs, there is no need to give up whining when you feel negative about something or someone, since this is a behavior in common like breathing and eating.

You are welcome to change your behavior. I see nothing wrong with trying to improve the quality of experience you have when interacting with others. Best of luck to you in all your endeavors.

Good point. I don't blame AS for most of my problems. I have problems on top of problems and AS is the least of my worries. Most of my problems concern other areas of my life, not the AS area of my life. I only talk about the AS area in this forum because this is an ASD forum and I believe the AS to be the most relevent. I want to clarify. I was bullied for other reasons, not my (what was then thought of as) ADHD. But I don't talk about the other reasons because this isn't that kind of forum, methinks. I think the AS might have made things worse because I didn't know how to get along and respond to everyone but it wasn't the original reason I was bullied. Autism had nothing to do with it.