So I went to a aspergers and autism support group today...

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i hung out at AANE for a while when i was in boston. they have a great number of groups going on around the boston area, toronto has a lot fewer -- for adults; i signed up for a list but in the past months there hasn't been any activity.

i attended a women's group and an art thing at watertown main office, support group in canton, and pizza & game night in canton. and a bbq. i had trouble about the pizza, though, it's like, aspies love pizza and i'm doing gluten, casein and soy free (erm, trying).

undxed (going there soon, very soon), and i was very nervous at the time how i would be received in an aspie group. everyone was nice, for the most part.

i found it really quite affirming and alarming how much i related to a lot of the people there. i was in the very early stages of .. recognizing AS for real in myself. my bf came with me to a couple of these things. i'd recommend it. it helps to see how diverse we as a group are, blows away a lot of the myths.

i wish there were more adult groups.

Aww, ill have him read this, he'll prob blush haha. Yea surprisingly his whole car club are just as accepting, sometimes your be surprised on how some ppl actually do care and wto take that extra mile to learn that ur not some ret*d hehe.

When I went to the "pizza and game night" at AANE here in Boston, I didn't know that I had an official diagnosis. I was actually talking to one of their facilitators about getting help with getting diagnosed at the time. They ultimately did get me referred to someone who was able to get me the neurological testing I needed for legal reasons -- the psychologist there also informed me that the report I already had was an official diagnosis from the psychologist in Portland. I wasn't aware that it was a diagnosis -- the psychologist in Portland had just said "it's a report, but you'll need more". So apparently I now have 2 diagnoses. But when I went to the group meeting, I thought I was still in the "self-diagnosed" category. And nobody said anything about it -- it was just "hi, here are the drinks, we're out of food, sorry, and here's where everybody's sitting in groups playing trivial pursuit or x or y or z."

You are the first real person I've met since my self-diagnosis last summer, so that part was exceptionally cool.
I had no idea what to do with myself, so I didn't talk much. I figured someone else would come and take over. Still, it was good to meet someone from here.

I didn't even think of that part yet. You're right. Trust is so hard to do in this world. Right now, I don't really have anyone. Not at that level, anyway.

Hey if u do make up a support group on grasp lemme know ill join! i want to start up a support group at the college i attend, i'm still thinkin about it, itll be hard but i thought it would be such a great idea for families affected by autism to jus go and hang out in a judgement free zone ya know? who knows

Hi Tahitiii, you said,

"That does not sound like fun. Is it even healthy? Do you think it was helpful?" in response to my third therapy session where my wife and two sons went with me and were sharing their thoughts on my issues.

The sessions are designed to help me be a better father to my two sons. I have some issues where I feel awkward interacting with them the way a father should. Although I feel tremendous love for them, I have trouble showing them that love.

Was it fun? No. Halfway into the session I broke down and began crying, then my 7 year old son began crying because I was crying. He kept saying how much he loved me and wanted to do more things with me. We hugged for several minutes. I will never forget how tightly he was hugging me and telling me how much he loved me. My 12 year old son also stated he wanted to do more things with me. The therapist kept saying, "this is good, this is good..."

Is it even healthy? Yes, I think so. My therapist has given me some good advice in how to be able to share my feelings with them better. And he gave me a technique about involving myself into their interests. We all meet with the therapist again in two weeks. Today, my wife said she feels closer to me than ever because she is really beginning to understand things about me more than ever. By the way, I was recently diagnosed.

Do you think it was helpful? Yes. I can see hope for me.

My wife and I talked a bit today about my concerns on fathering issues. We are both convinced that I do spend a lot of time with my sons and talking with them and stuff. In fact, I probably spend as much time with them as most fathers do with their children. But, we see areas where I can improve---such as playing ball, playing their games, etc.

Tough I imagine, for an AS father if the kids like to play ball in particular... My guess would be that part of the reason why people with AS rarely develop any interest in sports is because of sensory issues and how they tend to cause inefficiency in motor control. I had underdeveloped gross motor skills as a child (although I'm told my fine motor skills were advanced, probably due to my interest in illustration). Clumsy kids like us aren't good at sports, so we tend not to be interested in areas where we're unskilled. So as an adult, for myself in particular I know that I would really have to push myself to get out and play ball with Nicholas because my interest in sports has always been slightly less than zero.

Luckily you live with your sons. I haven't lived with my kids in the past decade. We're moving back to Dallas to change that. But I'm told that Nicholas (my youngest, with whom I have the least relationship) is a stereotypical jock-type. That scares me honestly. I might be able to play ball with him, but I'm not likely to be very good at it and may tire easily due to not being very physically fit and having to chase after the ball a lot. I'm much more comfortable interacting with my daughters, my oldest Alex who's taken an interest in illustration like myself and my younger daughter Calli who's interested in dinosaurs, but is very quiet and heady much like I was at her age and whom I suspect is on the spectrum.

I went to my first one today and I felt so nervous, I stimmed like crazy. The gathering was more like therapy/school. I met this real nice lady there and she rescued me from the Temple Grandin interview for a few minutes. Boy it was long and there were breaks during it but Roger Meyers does not allow anyone to talk during the breaks. I stimmed less when we came back inside. I guess all I needed was fresh air. I also kept my body stiff so I wouldn't stim. sometimes I like to challenge myself. See how long I can go without making a stim and I didn't sweat this time.

But sadly the lady left and I thought she just wet outside to take a walk because she needed a break from all that bla bla bla Roger was doing but no I realized all her stuff was gone so I new she left for good. I felt like crying. Because I wanted to talk to her some more and I enjoyed it but I had to be quiet because Roger decided to have a discussion about our experience with the snow we had last month. Then after we all had out five minute talk, he talked but wouldn't shut up and he said he would only talk for a few minutes. Even aspies can mislead. Hey but I learned on here "few minutes" can mean to "a half hour" but he talked more than that. I am sure the lady got frustrated so she left or she had to be home at a certain time because she took the bus. I know how I feel when I want to be home at a certain time when you need to get up early the next day for work.

I want to go back despite all the bla bla bla but I really liked that lady. I will just keep going just as long as there are people there I enjoy. I think I'll start requesting days off for that day.

I am starting a group a week from Tuesday in Northern New Jersey. It was supposed to be last Tuesday, but it was canceled due to snow.

where in north jersey? please say not that far up north... i also wish it wasnt on tuesdays, the only night i have class ahhh

Flag you say? At NAU?

PM me sometime, or I will pm you... lol.

I live in a large city, but all there is is parent support groups for those with children with autism spectrum disorders. None for adults with ASD or what would be even better for me would be a parent support group for parents with ASD with children (either NT or ASD). When this group has gatheriings, they know that i will most likely be playing with my kids rather than be socializing with all of the parents.

And I adore my group Lovely lads (and girls ) I'm glad I joined it

oh it's quite a way, Australia.

I used to go to one when I lived in Ireland. I still miss it.

Hahaha, seriously? That's like setting up an open bar for an AA meeting. I know it wasn't funny for you at the time but...