(VIDEO) Epiphany: Defecits become Strengths

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This can be very true.
Some find my eccentricities and quirks very offputting.
BUT - i know many people and am actually received well in certain circles because of my eccentric ways when i do venture out into the world. People do tell me they like me and find me fascinating. I have also been told that i have had a markedly prnounced and powerful effect on others who have become close to me. (i have also been bullied and hurt and have been misunderstood a lot, and the scarring form this has taken years to get through, as Zonder sates.)

THe difficulty for me has been that i never really experience that closeness in a reciprocal fashion. So peoplehave felt moved by me, and i just wander off into oblivion, oblivious to the emotional bonds they have formed with me.

People like me. But do i like people? that is the question for me. And if i like them... for how long and where? one hour or two? out and about or at home?
Occasionally i have let people in to my life and who i am.

I think over the course of my life people have clearly mistaken my ASD honesty for intimacy. And so they perceive closeness with me when in fact there is little or none. I am 46 and it has never occurred to me to be anything but honest and frank. Nearing 50, i find the majority of people perhaps do not carry on in this manner.


However, Alex is right. People can like our quirks.
THey can like them a lot.

Our deficits can become our strengths.

We can even find a way to enjoy life and the word and our special interests.

lol. I see



Slavery. English was forced upon them when being enslaved and sent to the USA to strip them of their original culture(s) as part of making better slaves. They were prevented from speakign their original languages or be beaten to prevent a coordinated uprising, or they had people from different tribes work together to prevent that. Even with that, they fused the structure of their original languages with english words to result in the pidgin english.



I dunno. I'm not going to whip out that excuse that "they have soulllll"

Hey millie,

How is the exhibit you were working on? Hope that the outcome is to your liking - and that it is well received.

I like what you wrote, particularly about the reciprocation. I can have glimmers of closeness, but they don't seem to be sustainable. OR, I am so out of sync that it doesn't register how I feel about others until much later. It is really tough to try to keep up a relationship when you can't tell what you are feeling.

Maybe people respond positively because you are authentic, and that quality is rare in a world of appearances and positioning.

Z

all the work is done for the exhibiton. I paint so much that there is always a glut of work and i never actually have to "Work towards a show" like non-ASD painters!!
i am in bed with post people contact exhaustion today. My son had his cousin with us for 2 days. I am wrecked from trying to keep up with another person in the house. (and he is a quiet geeky kid.)

Yes, it is the reciprocity of feeling that is the issue, and the delayed emotional reactions....that difficulty identifying one's feelings -and the need to process the emotions at one's own pace which can be months out of synch with the actual communication exchange. I can be reading something one afternoon and suddenly have a feeling about a remark someone made two montsh before - it is such a different way of processing things to most people who have a kind of on-the-spot smoothness between mind and heart.

alexythimia (sp?) is the name for not knowing what one is feeling.

Spelling, hate it.

Being alexithymic makes it difficult to process emotional information - you own, or other people's, and it shows up in a lot of people with ASD. There can be a positive side - being emotionally detached can allow for evaluating things in a logical way, rather than in an emotional way. But it can also lead to anxiety because it can be so difficult to judge emotional content.

Glad to hear that you had plenty of work for the show -- rest up -- you deserve some down time.

Z

I have been wondering about "Ebonics" and maybe Warsie can enlighten me a bit.

I think there is a lot of cool expressions in that language, but I can't understand why ebonics speakers insist on keeping grammatical errors and misspelling in this language (like "she don't" instead of "she doesn't", "them people" instead of "those people" etc. etc.).
I assume it happened to be this way because no one bothered to teach black people classical English to begin with, but why keep it this way? Why not say: "I'm not stupid, I can learn grammar too", learn it and make this a statement? Why is poor grammar something to be proud of???

I don't mean to offend anyone, but I really can't understand that

The answer is that, as there is Neuro-diversity, there's Linguo-Diversity. AS is a different Neurology, Pidgin' English is a different English (a dialect).

It was established by the Linguistic erudites that if a certain way of speaking a language is shared by an X amount of people at least, then it's not "wrong" grammar and pronunciation but "different" (dialect).

Don't forget that Shakespeare wasn't able to market his masterpieces at the beginning because people were in horror of his "low-class", "incorrect", "wrong" English. Nowaday's "best English" is equated with "Shakespeare's English".

There's no such thing as correct or incorrect English. What you speak today is/was considered appallingly wrong and low-class at another point and/or in another time.

As a Linguist and teacher of English, I learned this attitude at university and totally agree with it.

Mutual tolerance of different cultural expressions.

I've often wondered that, too! It may have something to do with other cultures just singing more than white/western culture does. Here, if you burst into song in public, it embarrasses the people around you. It is not the done thing. . I've noticed other cultures just sing as a normal part of life. It is regardless of age, mothers sing to their children and without that horrible self-conscious "how do I look?" aspect that affects every action taken by the stereotypical middle classes. Singing can occupy a different role in life, something that everyone does, rather than something you pay money to see a professional do

Which is a long winded way of saying: "They just got soul"

The Jive Talk translator is brilliant! I've had many a laugh translating technical documents and management directives into Jive Talk It has several dialects, but Jive is the best, !

http://www.rinkworks.com/dialect/

Preach it loud, bruddah!

It may gots sump'n t'do wid oda' cultures plum sin'in' mo'e dan honky/western culture duz. Here, if ya' bust into beat in public, it embarrasses de sucka's around ya'. It be not da damn done doodad. . I've noticed oda' cultures plum sin' as some no'mal part uh life. It be regardless uh age, moders rap t'deir children and widout dat ho'rible self-conscious "how do ah' look?" aspect dat affects every acshun snatchn by de stereotypical middle classes. Rappin' kin occupy some different role in life, sump'n dat everyone duz, rada' dan sump'n ya' pay bre'd t'see some professional do

What's this Jive Talk you speak of? (above is your post translated by the Dialectizer)

I think there must be a genetic difference at work too. Looks like black people are born knowing how to dance and sing beautifully. We observe this where I come from in Brazil. A black toddler often dances like no white dancer could.

I ain't got no formal training in linguistics, so this is all hillbilly academics.

It's been my impression that the dialect of black Americans places the greatest emphasis on the vowel sounds, while the mainstream white dialect focuses on the sound of the consonants. This reaches it's lowest point of degeneracy in California, where the vowel sounds are all pronounced essentially the same.

Might be some connection with music there, I don't know. Vowels are definitely more musical, and the musical traditions coming out of California sound to me like industrial noise.

White southern dialect also emphasizes the vowel sounds.

Speech that's considered bad grammar often flows more smoothly than the technically correct stuff. Ain't nothing more to it. No sense following rules just to be following rules.

A short, sweet, to the point video with a nice positive message.

As for the the video sound quality, I was able to hear it well, though keep in mind I'm one of those Aspies who test on the verge of superhuman hearing. (Even heard the high-pitched alarm beep outside the isolation booth that was supposed to alert the nurse that the hearing test was over. She had such a shocked expression when I raised my hand to respond to the sound it was comical.)

Agree that our quirks can become our strengths. A supportive family helps in that, as does a positive attitude. I also am a strong believer in the power of prayer.

Wow! A Dialectizer ?!?! Way Cool ! !! !!

Glad your discussion brought it to my attention, ManErg and Greentea!

Thanks!

I can't say much about the topic, since as I been getting older, people appreciate my quirks even less than they did before, which wasn't much to start with.

Think it's got something to do with puppies being more charming than old dogs.

Maybe somebody else's experiences are different.

lol sure
im not a native speaker being autistic but i have knowledge



those are not grammar errors; the grammar function stays the same throught the usage' transplanting the west african languages onto english words...looking for a source...

eh; using wikipedia.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/African_Am ... ct_marking



because it's not 'poor grammar' it's a distinct dialect with its' on rules.

EDIT: damn spelling, without my firefox highlighting out bad spelling errors I won't notice otherwise FFFFFFFFFFFFFFF



lol.



"what is soul" as I don't have a concrete definition. Anyone want to help me with this.



lol @ 'hacker' dialect

I translated the GNAA recruitment thing (part of it)





what the f**k? Where's the n****r at!! !!



loll. that's 'hardcore' 1337. there needs to be a chanspeak translator



...or it's cultural.

Why do I fail at this then.



this is correct. there are similar things in AAVE and Southern Dialects IIRC

Warsie may say otherwise about the ancient history, but I can tell you that people in MY day weren't! Black people that were born long before I was weren't! HECK, there are some blacks that speak better than most whites, and there are some whites that speak as poorly as some of the worst blacks.

I can tell you FOR A FACT! People, like blackcat here, even complained about it, that BLACKS are encouraging blacks to speak poorly. THAT was the REAl reason for "ebonics". It became BLACK, because the culture was most of the BLACKS. Whites have the SAME problem, but the cultures are FAR smaller. And SOME pidgeons are related to mixtures and have anotheer name that makes it sound better. I won't mention that anymore, because at least 1 state has a lot of people that speak one. Of course, a lot of people speaking THAT are black, but that is because they identify with the OTHER culture as well, and have been exposed to it so much.



THAT is a matter of opinion and preference. A lot of blacks sing a certain way and want to hold notes, warble,. etc.... Frankly, half the time, I wish they would sing songs as they have been sung traditionally. But most other races USUALLY don't sing songs like blacks unless they have been traditionally sung that way. BTW the customer was probably telling the truth. even some blacks that seem to have horrible speaking voices can sing very well, and it IS something that other races often don't try to emulate. BTW I HAVE heard some white sing some songs like that, and I think they sound as good as any of the black singers doing it. That just doesn't often happen.

Of course, some whites DO try to sing like blacks, and fall flat on their faces("Meaning that they fail in a comical way"). Most of them aren't good singers anyway, so don't hold that against whites. Look at the "American idol" tryouts. Some idiots THERE SWEAR that they are great singers, etc... and I bet 99% of the people watching, including ALL the judges, think they are just IDIOTS! You have to wonder what they are thinking. BTW most of those people are NOT black. I am simply saying that their claiming to be a "singer" doesn't mean they can sing.

One more thing too. There ARE a lot of bad BLACK singers also.

There really isn't a language called "pidgin english". It simply refers to s language that is obviously english, but is a pidgin. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pidgin

BTW that article seems to be fairly complete and unbiased. It is only a coincidence that it agrees with what I say here.

Look at what it says about a pidgins development.