Alexythmia

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the test is too difficult for me.
i have much trouble answering correctly in tests of this nature.
the first question i got stuck on was question 1.

i could not answer it in a way that is accurate. i never feel true emotions, so i mostly know the answer to "what emotion am i feeling?". the answer is "nothing".
so i should check "strongly disagree". but "strongly disagree" also infers alternatively, that i always can describe my "emotions". i do not have them. the questions are hard to answer because the test will be incorrect in it's assumptions.

other examples are



this sounds like the last question except that "feelings" are different to "emotions" i think (based upon observation).
so, while i have a "poverty of emotions" (as described in my diagnosis) , i do have basic feelings, and they are "pleased", "neutral" and "displeased".
i usually feel "neutral", but they are the only three words i have to know in order to describe how i feel.
if i am "pleased", then i am "pleased" and that is all there is to it. i do not feel any of this "oooh i'm so happy i feel like my heart has been swept aloft by a flock of sparrows" stuff.

skip to...



i want to check "strongly disagree" , which would make it sound like they never tell me that.
but i would want to check that option because even though people do tell me that, but i am NOT doing my utmost to understand. in fact i do not try much at all.

so i chose mainly "undecided" throughout the test.
the "evaluate test results" button did nothing, and i am not interested in my score so i will not laboriously tabulate it manually.

a friend of mine the other month said that after he read about it, he felt that he had it.
i discounted his comment because how could he tell me he "felt" he had it if he can not tell me what he feels?

anyway, i have never really learned exactly what an "emotion" is. it is intangible (even on a conceptual level), so i can not grasp it. people have described what "emotions" are to me many times.
it is like trying to describe "color" to a person who has been blind since birth.
it is impossible for blind people to ever really "see" color, but some seem like they understand it.
like songs by some blind people that use colorful imagery in the lyrics seem very visually imaginative, and the composer seems knowledgeable about color and visual beauty, when in fact, they never have seen anything at all in their lives.

i know that no blind person (from birth) could ever imagine what "color" truly is.

even though i was said to have a "poverty of emotions", "emotions" are not so easy to diagnose the absence of, so i do not know if i have them or not.

it is similar to : if there was no such thing as blindness, and if no one knew a blind person was blind and never told them, and the blind person did not know they lacked a sense that sighted people have, would the blind person feel "sure" they know what color is ?

who knows.
sorry for not being able to be concise.


p.s what happened to the 20 min edit thing where it did not say "edited" at the bottom of the page if you edited it with in 20 mins?

anyway my edit was to get rid of superfluous quotes and add a crucial word to avoid misapprehension of a sentence.

Last edited by b9 on 28 May 2009, 8:38 am, edited 2 times in total.

I've taken this test before, and I scored in the "Has Alexithymia" range.
I certainly agree that I show the traits for it. But, I'm not sure how much I believe in Alexithymia as being some separate condition.
I see it to be part of Asperger's, or perhaps related to my social anxiety. It's like alexithymia is just a name for a set of traits, not an independent disorder.

I don't really comprehend what people mean when they mention "identifying emotions". I have no trouble identifying how I feel. If I can't identify how I feel about something that usually means I don't feel any particular way about it. I can (and often do) lie about how I feel but that's not identifying anything, that's just BS'ing in order to be socially correct.

But identifying the causes, well that's a completely different story. I do have trouble with this. When people ask me why I'm feeling depressed I often don't have any simple answers for them and they get frustrated. A lot of the time I'm just unenthused about life in general.

all the questions generally mean the same thing, lol

either way i answered "agree" to just about all of them. it's the whole "lack of empathy" autistic deal imo.. didn't know it had a special name.

I don’t feel a need to actually lie, but I do often let them assume. They love to project. Most of the time, it’s not worth it to try to clarify. If I deny the most obvious feeling, they’ll either assume that I’m lying or project the next most obvious feeling. Or maybe not even hear my denial at all, because it’s just too absurd to them. Hearing what I’m actually saying is never an option. If they’re going to get it wrong no matter what I say or do, why bother?

That is so me. It’s three things going on at once:

[1] I never thought to call it “unenthused about life in general.” My way of thinking of it is that running a low emotional temperature is normal for me – I’m sorry if my failure to act like a manic-depressive is not entertaining enough for you.

[2] I often don't have any simple answers for why I'm feeling depressed (or whatever) because (a) it’s too long and no one has that kind of time and (b) the person I’m talking to is usually guilty of the same things as the person I’m complaining about. They don’t want to hear it.

[3] It’s hard to pin it down because, at any given moment, I can think of a thousand reasons to be upset or depressed. Which one is keeping me awake or turning my stomach THIS time? Let me toss that 20-sided die. #1 will represent the fact that I married an azz. #2 will represent the fact that my parents were azzes. #3 Wars, corruption, the fate of the world and that I don’t really expect to be alive this time next year. #4 I need a job. #5 I feel guilty and inadequate in my volunteer stuff. #6 I’m worried that I went wrong with my kids on various issues. #7 I’m worried about physical health issues (have suspicious symptoms) and this would be a really inconvenient time for them. #8 The thought of packing all my junk so I can move is overwhelming… I could go on and on.

yoep... 150, where do I claim my price?!