Which have it harder? Male Aspies or female Aspies?

Post Reply New Topic

Look, men are ''allowed'' to act a bit odd more than women.

Look, men are ''allowed'' to act a bit odd more than women. I often see boys with a stooped posture and doesn't seem to make them stand out, whereas a girl has to walk up straight, they seem to look weirder if they are walking around like that.

And women have to make more effort. I know a man who has long, thick, greasy hair and dirty clothes and has a big beer belly, but nobody judges him or looks at him funny or anything. But I bet if I walked around with greasy hair and dirty clothes and a fat figure, I would most probably be shamed and people would tease me and girls would look upon me. I know it.

Just men seem to get away with more. Men have less expectations than women do. I've just got my hair styled and I'm starting to wear a bit of make-up, and ever since, I've had more respect from people, looked a bit older, and stopped being a victim all the time, and even teenagers have walked by and not mocked me, and when I give CVs around, I get a polite reply back, and less girls look at me funny in fashion shops too. So now I've got to add some new tasks to my routine (which is difficult when you suffer with executive dysfunction), and if it were upto me, I would be happy only washing my hair once a week, not wearing any make-up, just tying my hair back, and wearing tracksuit bottoms and scruffy trainers. But I want to get better respect from people, so I have to make that much effort with myself in order to get it. Men, on the other hand, don't have to shave their legs or armpits, and although it's not that nice to go out looking skanky they still don't seem to get judged in the way a skanky woman would, and they can shave their head if they want and won't get shamed if they choose to grow a beard, and they don't have to wear any make-up to get respect from other people.....


Men do have to make an effort, but women have to make twice the effort. Women just seem to get judged in a different way, and get more pressure. So you can imagine how hard it is for Aspie women. Plus (NOT SURE IF THIS IS TRUE OR NOT SO DON'T GO THINKING I'M SOME SORT OF a***hole) but female Aspies tend to be more aware of the social world more than a male Aspie might. Women have more of a social trait in them anyway, and I think SOME female Aspies can develop the social trait too, whereas a male Aspie seems to be more able to focus on a clever interest. I'm not into science or maths or other things like that - I'm more into socialising, although I'm no good at it so I just spend all my life being miserable. I'm only averagely intelligent, my social IQ seems to be higher than my intellectual IQ but that doesn't mean my social skills are at the normal standards.

Actually, when a man acts a bit odd he's perceived as threatening(ESPECIALLY by women). When a woman acts a bit odd, she's perceived as meek and in need of a helping hand.

or bullying I think I would have preferred the helping hand as a kid and still would prefer that.

Love & Dating forum is not a statistical analysis of who ends up married.

also, a person could just as easily say that many men in L&D ARE judgemental about women's social skills in dating. there is a thread right now of a man who doesn't want to date aspie girls, and in a thread devoted to the idea of whether aspie women are attractive... aspie men were split. i'd say that is very judgemental indeed.

whatever argument you make based on anecdotal forum evidence can easily be negated a counterargument to the same effect.

BTW, Joe90,

Why did you start this thread?

I started it ages ago, somebody just happened to bump the topic. But it seems that male Aspies say it's harder for males, and female Aspies say it's harder for females.

Let's just say it's harder for all Aspies who have social phobia and fear of rejection and humiliation and hate being odd. There, I said it.

(...) Plus (NOT SURE IF THIS IS TRUE OR NOT SO DON'T GO THINKING I'M SOME SORT OF a***hole) but female Aspies tend to be more aware of the social world more than a male Aspie might. Women have more of a social trait in them anyway, and I think SOME female Aspies can develop the social trait too, whereas a male Aspie seems to be more able to focus on a clever interest.

I'm not into science or maths or other things like that - I'm more into socialising, although I'm no good at it so I just spend all my life being miserable. I'm only averagely intelligent, my social IQ seems to be higher than my intellectual IQ but that doesn't mean my social skills are at the normal standards.

I started it ages ago, somebody just happened to bump the topic. But it seems that male Aspies say it's harder for males, and female Aspies say it's harder for females.

Let's just say it's harder for all Aspies who have social phobia and fear of rejection and humiliation and hate being odd. There, I said it.

Autism is a male privileged neurological disorder.

Research is biased greatly toward boys. This is justified by citing the fact THAT diagnosed cases of autism are predominately male even though it is well known THAT methods for diagnosing girls are less effective AND when girls are affected the severity can be more debilitating.

How many aspergers women/girls have you seen portrayed in movies ? As daughters, mothers, career women and love interests ? Different but loveable ? In the last five years or so, it has become trendy to be a male aspie. IF you are NOT in silicon valley reinventing the wheel, in some underground art culture giving Picasso the artistic finger, becoming a modern day DJ to everything RELATIVE to Einstein then Aspie men are surely on the big screen forming romantic relations BY being their sincere quirky innocent selves.

Personally, i think it's a disadvantage to have both research and media NOT have an ideal of who YOU are.

It might help to simply ask.


TheSunAlsoRises

I definitely agree, there should be role models for every type of person. I was watching Bleach on my DVR today and I began to think that perhaps Captain Kuchiki has Aspergers. He is the quiet diligent type, very logical and all about personal pride. Though I don't really see C. Kuchiki as a good role model, certainly for his talent he is a role model, but otherwise he has some fatal flaws.

Now that guy from Big Bang Theory is supposed to have Aspergers, but he is still just one character... More is needed in terms of successful characters with Aspergers.

I'm curious though, why did type "YOU" in caps? What meaning is that supposed to have. Are you saying I'd make a good character or something? Or does it mean you as in any group of people sharing a trait?

Autism is a male privileged neurological disorder.

Research is biased greatly toward boys. This is justified by citing the fact THAT diagnosed cases of autism are predominately male even though it is well known THAT methods for diagnosing girls are less effective AND when girls are affected the severity can be more debilitating.

How many aspergers women/girls have you seen portrayed in movies ? As daughters, mothers, career women and love interests ? Different but loveable ? In the last five years or so, it has become trendy to be a male aspie. IF you are NOT in silicon valley reinventing the wheel, in some underground art culture giving Picasso the artistic finger, becoming a modern day DJ to everything RELATIVE to Einstein then Aspie men are surely on the big screen forming romantic relations BY being their sincere quirky innocent selves.

Personally, i think it's a disadvantage to have both research and media NOT have an ideal of who YOU are.

It might help to simply ask.


TheSunAlsoRises