Why Do People Hate Self-Diagnosers?

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Adult diagnosis of autism doesn't come with drugs, unless the drugs are needed to manage disorders that are not autism, e.g. depression, anxiety, bipolar, schizophrenia, ADHD. In rare cases, an adult may be prescribed risperdal to target specific problems rooted in autism, e.g. severe and frequent meltdowns, self-harm, harmful repetitive behaviors.

I used to be self-diagnosed. As of last November I am professionally diagnosed. The only difference is that I now have a 15-page report stating I have ASD, and I am $1,500 or so poorer.

I've read through every page, every single post, it was like watching children arguing over whose the 'pooh pooh face'. With a select few being somewhat tolerant. (You can decide for yourself whose who, better yet just assume I think it was all childish then you won't argue with anyone who is willing to argue back.)

Both sides with extremely staunch views. [B&W thinking]

Both sides thinking they know best. [Arrogance]

Both sides being oblivious to the others social-emotional needs. [Social-emotional reciprocity deficits anyone]

Both sides demonstrating a lack of emotional control. [whether admittedly or not]

Both sides showing perseverance. [what page are we on again?]

The list goes on....

The funny (as in ironically asinine) part is, both sides kept spewing the same refrain over and over again hoping the next iteration would somehow get the point across. [welcome to the department of redundancy department ]




(Side note: I really don't care what anyone is, if your behavior towards me and others is that of an ass frequently (everyone has bad days not so much bad weeks/months/years) you can be the queen mother superior diagnosed by Freud himself or self proclaimed supreme commander of the imperial army and you'd still be an ass and only an ass in my opinion.)

Sorry I got side tracked mid thought.

To continue:

The reason that would be considered a 'grey' view is, because it allows for the possibility that something might work for someone else, while still allowing for the idea that something different worked for you. For the most part if your thought contains, 'always, should, shouldn't, never, etc' it's most likely a B&W thought. Sometimes B&W thinking is good though, you shouldn't get in cars with strangers, you should get dressed before going outside (unless you live in a nudist colony or own a lot of land), you should try to be tolerant of others even when they aren't as tolerant as you.

Another example of B&W thinking is I always like my tea in a certain mug, I get very flustered when it's not in that mug, because it should be in it that's the mug I always use. I won't allow anyone else to use it unless they have no other choice. Is it important that I change that, no not really it doesn't hurt anyone that I like my tea out of that mug. Would it hurt if I had to drink from a different mug, well.....

I don't hate self-diagnosers at all--unless they really don't seem to be on the spectrum to me, in which case it feels like they expect that I understand them or feel some sort of kinship when I don 't. On the other hand, a lot of people who ARE professionally diagnosed are so different from me that I don't feel a connection either, so with self-diagnosed people I'm not quick to judge.

Also, I generally do feel a sense of "otherness" to many who weren't diagnosed until adulthood. And many who are self-diagnosed are that way--I haven't met many people who self-diagnosed (or were diagnosed by parents, without input from a professional) in childhood. My behavioral issues as a child were such that I pretty much HAD to be diagnosed with something, and many who made it to adulthood without contact with professional psychologists had much less severe problems, hence a more "normal" childhood. Also, people who believed they were "normal" as kids tend to have fit in better, hence they are more normal/mainstream as adults.

My problems with self-diagnosis are not the type that could be resolved by "it's good that it works for you, but it doesn't work for me". I don't believe in the validity of the process of self-diagnosis, and I consider saying that one is autistic without official diagnosis to be misrepresentation. I also don't believe in diagnosis for personal or group identity reasons. I believe in diagnosis to address impairments. I find more connection with people who don't self-diagnose, but recognize that they have autistic traits, they seem more similar to me in terms of how they think and feel.