Autism and empathy

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All I want is for people to treat me as I treat them: with kindness and open mindedness.

But it seems the human race is getting more and more selfish and 'me me me', not noticing that other people have problems different to theirs. Probably because there are so many humans now, the Earth is overcrowded.

It wasn't like this when I was younger, people were more accepting of others problems. At least where I lived anyway.

I've seen people here say that there are typically arguments on autism sites like this one because there's a lack of empathy among the autism community. But those people simply haven't seen sites and social media that aren't autism-specific, such as Facebook. I've seen loads of arguments on Facebook more than here, plus bullying due to disagreements, and it would be unfair to assume that the people on Facebook and other non-autism sites who bully or have arguments are only autistics or psychopaths. A lot of them are probably well-adjusted NTs who can't agree.

I think WP is a very empathetic place, despite the disagreements and victimising I have seen going on here and have experienced myself. I believe that is because we are all humans too and nobody is perfect, and wherever there are people there will typically be disagreements, victimising, etc etc, even over the most pettiest of topics.

I like the idea that this is a relatively safe place, even though I am half scared out of my wits to post an opinion. I only frequent online support groups, so wouldn't know in general. Facts as we interpret them feel safe enough. Fact: This is my lived experience (right or wrong). Fact: This source said (right or wrong). I'm scared when I go beyond that.

Yes, I do get scared to post my opinion here these days too. I was even scared to post a dream I had the other night (in the weirdest dream thread) because it involved an electric chair, and for some reason I had visions of getting a PM from the mod saying my post has been removed because mentioning an electric chair might be offensive to Americans or something. I know you're not allowed to mention guns or shooting on Facebook because of that country.

Last edited by Joe90 on 14 May 2023, 9:04 am, edited 1 time in total.

So far, I've only seen the good side of WP. It seems nice and friendly IMO.

But I've been online since 2009, I've seen the really ugly sides of Twitter, Facebook, other sites. I've been insulted, sexually propositioned, bullied, excluded, attacked verbally, trolled.

I haven't had any of that on WP yet but I will stand up for myself if necessary. I've kept my claws in so far but I've had a lot of practice defending myself on those other sites, I'm pretty battle-hardened.

I don't think you'd get any flak for mentioning 'Old Sparky' in a dream you had, it's just a dream. Graphic detail might not be appreciated, or your opinion on the death penalty might cause a debate.

It might be a good idea not to refer to America as a “wretched country.” Some people might find that hurtful for obvious reasons.

99% of WP members are friendly. A small percentage of members will speak up when they disagree with something and can be passionate about it. Troublemakers don't last long here.

I nearly posted the same advice but thought it might be seen as provocative coming from me.

There are more than enough anti-American idiots here already.

As an unpatriotic American, I don’t find it hurtful although I can see why others certainly would, especially when various members are making similar comments. It’s just an extreme thing to say. In order for me to call a country “wretched,” conditions would have to be horrific, and I would be commiserating with the people, not satirizing their situation.

In general, I have more of a worldview. I don’t like the tribal behavior and ethnocentrism that so often accompanies attitudes toward one’s country and those of others.

With that being said, it’s better to critique specific laws or political leaders than an entire country.

I've edited my post before I unintentionally cause an argument here then someone will end up calling me "lack of empathy" which will enrage me and there'll be another 10 pages of off-topic arguments about my posting style and...

Yeah.

Even so, and it was quite a graphic dream, so I quickly changed my mind.

I just feel angry about America because of the gun laws, that's all.

This is a post about empathy, so I will explore. When I read "wretched country" I get a tightness in my chest. Then I think about the facts: it is true in part (some things come to mind) and untrue in part (other things come to mind). Seemingly leaning towards the former more so these days. Then I get a tightness in my throat, because I can feel the horribleness of the hard parts (like Joe) and I wish I could do more about it. Then I steel myself because I'm doing my small part and that's all I have to give at this time. Then I'm sad I don't have more to give. Then it's time to distract myself and suppress those feelings ---unless I want to do EMDR (or meditate or other tool) --- my therapist suggested I do it when I have symptoms of anxiety and I was like --- I'd being doing to 15 times a day and would have time for little else. She says it would lessen over time...

I think it’s mostly untrue. We have a lot of freedom. While imperfect, we have social systems in place which help people. There’s peace. We are lucky compared to a lot of people in the world - past and present. There are better places to live, but there are far worse places, too.

It's still just a dream. I'm sure you could tone it down if you wanted to post it.

Gun laws - that's another debate that can cause a lot of passion, don't go there unless you bring your A game. Although you may be in the majority with your opinions - take a look viewtopic.php?t=413324#p9283505

I just hate it whenever I hear of another mass shooting in America and people have been hurt or lost their lives.
But let's drop this gun topic otherwise this thread will become political and I've been advised not to discuss political matters here.

I have a lot of empathy but my political opinions can be rather stoic, probably because where I come from most people I know share the same views and get angry at the way of the world. That's why I love watching South Park.